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A Fair Trade	By : sesshoumarusmistressofthewest Category: 1 through F > Beetlejuice Views: 4507 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to the Beetlejuice franchise nor do I make any money from this. I just like to use them for my own twisted amusement and that is payment enough.

Chapter List
- 7
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Disclaimer: I don't own anything associated with the Beetlejuice franchise nor do I make any money from this.

“Betelgeuse, we are not juicing to my parent’s house,” remarked the pregnant woman standing in the kitchen both hands on her hips, watching the man at the table continue to read the paper. Her eye begun to tick in annoyance, and a foot started to tap against the tiled floor. Was he even listening to her?
His bottle-green eyes flicked up from the newspaper taking note of his wife's agitation with raised brows. She was mad, and the poltergeist had no clue as to why since he wasn't ignoring her. For fuck's sake, he heard every word that she was squawking about. Betelgeuse could feel the irritation growing while his gaze narrowed, and he barked out, "Why the hell not?"
A sigh fell from her pink lips before she answered him. “I’m not that far along, and we don’t even know if it’s safe for the baby and me. I don’t want to risk it, Betelgeuse.” She didn’t mean to make it seem like his power would hurt them, but the truth of the situation was that she shouldn’t even be pregnant. She didn’t want to do anything that could jeopardize the pregnancy.
Betelgeuse set the paper down even more irritated with the assumption that his juice would hurt his wife and unborn child. His lips curved into a frown as his tone heated slightly. “My juice is fuckin’ safe, Babe. Ya know I’d never put either of you in danger.” Letting out a huff, he made a point to remind her that she let him juice with their daughter and never said a lick to him about it. “You let me juice with Bug all the fuckin’ time, and she comes back in one damn piece just fine.”
Running her hand through her raven locks, she let out another sigh and tried to unruffle her husband’s feathers. “I know you wouldn’t hurt us, honey but I’m a little nervous.” Hell, she was more than a little nervous. Her mind couldn’t help but go to all of the things that could go wrong, and there were many them. She should have never started reading that damn pregnancy book. “Many things can go wrong in the first few months, Betelgeuse.” Lydia placed a hand on her stomach, her tone dropping softly. “I just don’t want anything to happen to the baby.” The pregnancy may have been unexpected, but it was most definitely not unwanted.
The chair scraped across the floor when the poltergeist stood to move to where his wife was. Betelgeuse wrapped his long fingers around her wrist and pulled her gently to him. He looped his arms around her waist and whispered into the side of her head. “Sweets, that kid of mine ain’t goin’ nowhere. You got nothin’ to worry about, ya hear me?”
Her face buried into his shoulder, breathing in his earthy scent before she pulled back a little to look up at him with puppy eyes and a nod. “Yeah, I hear you, but I’d still feel better if we drove to my parents.”
His gaze softened at the sight while a sigh escaped. His ample shoulders sagged in resignation as he said something. “Fine. If it will make ya feel better, then we’ll drive there..." Betelgeuse then paused a mischievous grin surfacing on his rugged features before continuing, "but under one condition, Babe."
She raised a black brow and asked what the man wanted. “And that would be?”
“I get to drive.” Declared the poltergeist with eyes twinkling in amusement. He gave her a little squeeze then laughed boisterously.
Lydia let out a snort while shaking her head and waving a hand to and fro. “I’ve heard about your driving, so no not happening.” She was not letting this man behind the wheel, not after what Barbara and Adam had told her. How could she trust him to drive a real car, when the man couldn’t even drive a toy one? Seriously, crashing into a goddamn fire hydrant.
His grin fell at his wife’s rejection, and he let out a cry of protest. “Awe come on, Sweets. That was a long time ago, and I was under fuckin’ duress.”
Duress! HA! Who the hell was he trying to fool? Her brows went up once again, and another snort rang from her. “Duress, my pregnant ass! You were pissed off.”
The poltergeist’s face clouded at the memory then contorted into anger. “Damn right! That would’ve been one of my best if it hadn’t been for those goody-goodies.”
Didn’t he realize that if his scheme would have gone the way he had planned it, then the chance of them being like this might never have happened? Lydia’s chest just hurt thinking about not being with this man. If it weren’t for him, where would she be? Most likely dead because there was a big chance that she would have still had her photographs shown at the same gallery and met Luke.
She saddled closer to her husband, a hand coming up to rest on his chest as she peered up at him with a small frown marring her lips. “If it hadn’t been for them, you most likely would have scared us off, and there’s a good chance that we wouldn’t be here right now.”
His large hand raised to her cheek and cupped it tenderly while utter confidence colored his tone. “Naw, if you’d had run I would have found ya.”
Lydia leaned into his touch and questioned her confident husband with a smile playing on her lips. “Oh yeah, why is that?”
Betelgeuse flashed his gorgeous wife a blinding smile. His voice dropping to a smoky timber, while moving his face closer so that he was staring into her dark eyes. “Cuz Babe…You had my attention.”
His words caused a rush of happiness and a silly smile to grace her features. Lydia should have known she had caught his attention since he had wanted to marry her. Granted, a huge part of that had been for his freedom, but maybe on a subconscious level, it had been more. Fluttering her lashes, she gave him a flirty grin as she spoke. “Do I still have your attention?
Heat flared in his glittering gaze while shooting her that predatory look of his and running a thumb along her bottom lip. “All the motherfuckin’ time, Baby.” He swiftly leaned in and kissed her soundly before pulling back, wiggling his brows and sporting another grin.
A laugh broke free as her cheeks warmed, and the small hand on his chest grasped at his button-up. What could she say? When this man kissed her like that, well, she can’t help the giddy feeling bubbling up inside of her. “Fine, you can drive.” She knew he would never intentionally hurt them, and it was ridiculous to rely on something that happened in the past. So, she caved and waited for her husband to crow loudly.
His face flushed with surprise as he stared down at his small wife. “No shit?” His grin became even wider and kissed her again.
She drew back and laughed at the poltergeist then pointed a finger and started to poke him in the chest. “Yeah, but if you crash, I’m kicking your ass.”
“Deal Babes,” agreed the dead man with a wink then he laughed happily before kissing her once more.
The couple broke apart when a hoarse cry sprang from the baby monitor resting on the table. Both parents promptly turned to the device then back to each other while the child’s crying increased with every call for her father. “Daaaaaaadaaaaaaaa!”
“I guess that little nap didn’t help her mood any.” quipped Lydia tiredly to her husband, who nodded his head in agreement and released his hold on her.
He blew out a large breath before stepping back and turning away from his pregnant wife to make his way quickly out of the room. She hurried to catch up and paused in Lucy’s doorway to watch as her ghostly husband approached their upset daughter.
In a few steps, the poltergeist was next to the crib gesturing to the little girl sitting there rubbing her wet eyes and calling for him. “Come here Bug,” cooed the dead man gently.
Her watery hazel eyes peered up at her father while she crawled to his waiting arms. “Daaadaaa.”
Snatching her up, Betelgeuse drew the infant to him and cooed softly into her matted locks. “Sssh…I know kiddo. Daddy’s here.” One arm was holding her snuggly to his side while the other went to rub her back.
Her little lip wobbled, and she tugged on her ear as she stared at her father and called out to him again. “Daadaa.”
The poltergeist continued to rub his daughter’s back and whispering as he did so. “Sssh…Daddy’s here now.” Lucy let out small whimpers then rested her blonde head on his shoulder. More soothing words came from the rough specter and unconsciously began to rock her back and forth. “Sssh…It’s okay, Bug.”
Lydia’s gentle tone came filtering into the room. She slowly made her way to the dead man and child with a frown marring her features. “I think she may be coming down with something.”
“Hmm…Lil Bug hasn’t been actin’ like herself,” said Betelgeuse while his gaze drifted to his wife then to their daughter before his forehead crinkled in thought. "It must be somethin'."
Lydia’s hand reached out and slowly stroked her daughter’s head. “Do you think we should cancel? We can do it another time?”
Her husband scoffed and turned his gaze back to hers. “You ain’t getting out of this one babe. Lil bug will be fine, and if she ain’t better by the time we get there, then we’ll quickly tell your folks and cut it short.”
“If you think it’s okay then fine we’ll go. Can you help me with the bags after you get her dressed?” asked Lydia as she stepped away for the father and daughter duo.
Snapping his fingers, the dead man smirked down at his wife and quipped smartly. “Done, Sweets. Now go get your coat and other shit on so we can hit the road.” He then began moving around the room to get Lucy ready for the trip.
It must be nice to be able to snap your fingers and get things done in a blink of an eye. That would be wonderful for when she can no longer see her feet. How many times while being pregnant with Lucy did she have mismatched shoes on? A snort left the woman as she thought to herself. 'Too many times to count.' "Wish I could do that?" grumbled Lydia loudly as she left her husband and child to go get the last of her things ready.
As soon as they on the road, it took the couple about an hour to drive from their place to her parents. By the time that they were driving up the winding private road, their temperamental child had fallen asleep once again.
When the car stopped in front of the house, Lydia turned to the poltergeist and gave him a pointed look as she spoke. “Betelgeuse, remember you promised to behave.”
Shifting the vehicle into park, he rolled his eyes and said drily, “Yeah, I remember. No scarin’ no one. Wouldn’t want to give daddy-in-law a good ole heart attack. I’ll be good. I swear it, Babe. Scouts honor.” He made the hand gesture of the boy scouts then winked before bending around the seat to release and grab a sleeping Lucy from her car seat.
She loudly snorted at the gesture and opened the door to step out. “When have you ever been a Boy scout?” asked the woman as she shut the door.
Betelgeuse peered over the top of the car and smirked. “I’ve been many things, Sweets.”
“I’m sure you have. You’ve been around for ages, after all.” She threw over a shoulder, laughing while walking to the front door.
“That makes me older and wiser than.” Retorted the man behind her.
“You got the old part right.” Lydia laughed some more as she approached the door but was stalled by her husband’s hand on her wrist.
His cool breath tickled her ear, causing a gasp from the pregnant woman and a chuckle from the devious specter. “Baby, that’s not what you were saying early this morning as I was poundin’ into that tight little pussy of yours. As I recall, it was don’t fuckin’ stop and harder Betelgeuse. I didn’t hear nothin’ about me being old.”
Her face flushed with color as she did indeed remember their morning activity and the things she had said during the heat of the moment. There had been a lot more than just those two things to come out of her mouth. Her poltergeist seemed to draw out aspects of herself that she never thought was possible.
Lydia tilted her head back, eyeing her husband while her pink tongue came out to lick her lips and purred at him. “Honey, I never said being old was a bad thing.” She drew closer to his cool lips and coasted over them before continuing, “Some things get better with time.” Right before the flirty woman was going to move in to touch their lips together, she pulled her body away from his and winked.
He growled loudly, then grumbled under his breath. “Fuckin’ tease.”
“Only to you baby.” remarked the newlywed with another wink before letting out a giggle and knocking on the door. When nobody came, Lydia opened it and stepped inside, calling for family. “Dad? Delia?” She looked around the room and called some more. “Barbra? Adam? We’re here!”
"Lydia my dear," yelled her stepmother from another room. They could hear the clicking of designer heels as she hurried towards the entry. "I'm coming!"
Delia passed through the doorway, wiping her manicured hands on a tea towel and smiling brightly. When her happy gaze landed on the dead man, her face paled then twisted into horrified shock. The towel fell to her feet, and the terrified woman scrambled backward until her back hit the decorated wall. A shaky hand pointed at the poltergeist and began to stumble over words eyes flicking to Lydia in horrified confusion. "W...w...what is HE doing here?"
Before Lydia could open her mouth to respond, her father came rushing out of another room. At the sight of them, he let out a scream of his own and made a beeline for his scare wife.
The pregnant woman watched as her parent eyed her husband in both terror and confusion. Well, this was going better than she had thought it would. Turning to the poltergeist, Lydia noticed the Glasgow grin plastered on his face and his eyes bright with amusement as he took in the flurry of chaos that erupted around them. It shouldn't have surprised her that he was enjoying the situation he thrived on this shit. Plus, she had asked him to behave, so this had to be wonderful to see her parent's nearly pissing themselves.
The sound of Barbara and Adam echoed from the second floor, and their voices came from the staircase. “Charles? Delia?”
Lydia and Betelgeuse both turned in that direction and watched as the ghostly couple flew down the stairs, only to pause when they spotted the poltergeist.
For a few seconds, the dead couple did nothing then the curly-headed specter snapped out of the shock as her mouth flopped open and his name spilled forth. “Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse!” Eagerly waiting for the poltergeist to vanish, the scared couple soon realized that nothing was going to happen when the specter remained.
Betelgeuse's head fell back, and an amused laugh sprang from him before returning his twinkling peepers to the in-laws. That Chelsea smile continued as his smoky tone echoed against the fashionable walls. “Sorry to disappoint you all but that shit doesn’t work anymore. I’m a free man. Well as free as a married man with a wife and kid can get.”
Lydia elbowed her husband in the stomach and turned to glare at him. “Gee, you make it sound like we are some kind of burden.”
Betelgeuse scoffed and narrowed his green eyes at her “Woman, don’t be puttin’ words in my mouth. I didn’t say shit about ya guys being a burden. You know I’m with ya cuz I want to be.” His hand snagged out and pulled her to him, both forgetting about the other people in the room. “Now don’t get your panties in a bunch. It’s not good for you to get upset and it’s most certainly not good for the baby, Babes.”
Despite being scared and confused, Delia was the one who questioned them. “Baby; What baby?”
Lydia gave Betelgeuse a pointed look, then turned to her family. Well, they were already upset. It couldn’t get any worse than this, so what the hell. “We’re having a baby.”
“WHAT!?” “But he’s dead?” “How is that even possible?” The two couples yelled in unison and watched Lydia and Betelgeuse with a mixture of horror and shock.
“Oh, it’s possible,” cut in a raspy voice through the chaos and out of the shadows stepped the elderly caseworker. “Geuse is a very powerful poltergeist and can do a magnitude of things. Though the power to reproduce is very rare and can only be achieved if the entity cares deeply for the one they are with.” Her eyes flicked over to Betelgeuse, before going back to the others. “I thought Geuse might have the ability, but I wasn’t too worried since he only cares about one thing, Himself.”
The poltergeist glared at the old dead woman and snarled at her. “Yeah, proved that shit wrong, now didn’t I Junie?”
Juno just shrugged her thin shoulders and puffed on her lit cigarette “We will see about that.”
Lydia felt a sudden burst of anger as she stared at the old woman and listened to her talk to her husband like the old bat knew what she was talking about. Who the hell did the stupid bitch think she was? The tiny newlywed shook off her husband and stepped forward. Hands came up to rest on her hips as she glared harshly at the elderly specter and snarled. “What the hell does that mean, Lady? He may be a pervy asshole at times, but he has been nothing but good to Lucy and me. You all look at him like he’s some kind of monster which is far from the truth. I’ve seen what live monsters can do and he is fucking far from it!” Lydia’s throat tightened as she forged on, “If it hadn’t been for him we would be dead. He saved us even when he could have refused. He saved us because he wanted to!”
“He saved you because he wanted something from you.” Juno cut in, and Lydia turned a Betelgeuse like sneer in her direction. “I called him because I fucking wanted something! I had known exactly what he wanted before I called him. I wasn’t naïve to that. His offer had been marriage, and I accepted what he had offered. And you all want to know what, I don’t regret it not one single fucking bit. It was like destiny or some shit like that.”
Betelgeuse let out a loud snort as he pulled his irate wife against him. “Hey Babes, that’s my line.”
She crossed her arms under her chest and huffed while tilting her head up to look him in the eyes. “Well I’m your wife, I can borrow your lines if I need them.”
He tried to hide the amused expression that wanted to break through as he kissed her temple and attempted to pacify his angry wife. “Sure Sweets, anytime ya want.” The poltergeist then whispered in her ear. “Seeing you go all bitchy mode on someone other than me was so fuckin’ hot, Babes.”
Of course, he would think it was hot. Only her husband would find her bitchiness remotely sexy. Her anger washed away with the onset of her amusement. A giggle bubbled forth, and she shook her head at the dead man as he grinned down at her with wiggling brows.
A throat cleared, and all eyes were drawn to the young deceased woman. She gave them all a hesitant smile and motioned to an open doorway. “Maybe we should take this into the sitting room so we can get the full story.”
Everyone in the room shook their heads in agreement and slowly made their way to the sitting room for an explanation.
Minutes later, they were all watching the new couple anxiously and waited for them to speak.
The poltergeist reclined against the couch cushions, his sleeping child in one arm and his tiny wife in the other. Lydia gave her husband a nervous smile which he returned with an encouraging smirk of his own and gathered her closer. She let out a sigh and rested her head on his shoulder as she spoke. “The night I called on Betelgeuse was the night Luke had broken into my home and tried to kill not only me but Lulu as well.”
The couple heard the intake of sharp breaths from the other occupants, but they didn’t interrupt the young woman. “He must have planned the break-in because he had cut the phone lines so I couldn’t call for help. If I had known that I wouldn’t have run with the phone to the bathroom to hid and call the cops.” Lydia buried her face in her husband’s shirt and took in his earthy scent before she pulled away and continued. “If I hadn’t called on Betelgeuse, Luke would have killed us. I asked him to get rid of my problem, and he did just that.”
Barbara was the first one to speak, “So you called him, and the deal was struck. What do mean by getting rid of? Did he…kill him?”
Lydia caught the dead woman’s judging gaze and shrugged indifferently. “Honestly I don’t know what Betelgeuse did to Luke and I’m not going to ask either. All I care about is he is gone and out of our lives.”
Barbara turned to her husband, sending him a worried glance before returning to the newlyweds with a disapproving frown. Adam cleared his throat, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose and taking over where his wife had left off. “But Lydia, it’s wrong to just murder someone even if they do deserve it. You shouldn’t be okay with it.”
Delia sneered vehemently shooting a hot glare at the dead couple while spitting heated words. “You say it’s wrong, but I can’t help but be thankful knowing that he will never hurt my daughter and granddaughter again.” She shrugged her shoulders and sneered some more. “So the rat bastard is dead. Good riddance. One less abusive asshole out there.”
The poltergeist let out a bark of laughter and directed a smirk of approval at his pissed off mother-in-law. “My thoughts exactly, Red.”
Delia twisted to the dead man her eyes widening as she took in his words then made an unpleasant face before turning away.
Betelgeuse rolled his eyes at their jumpy and twitchy behavior. Seriously, he hadn’t done anything yet, so why would he do something now? Plus, he promised his little wife and he wasn’t about to back out on his word.
“What about Lucy? What are you going to tell her?” Adam questioned as he eyed the couple and waited for their response.
Betelgeuse glared at the man shifting the sleeping child into a more comfortable position then tightened his hold. “We ain’t tellin’ her shit. To Bug, I’m her daddy, and that’s the way it’s gonna stay. She’s my kid, not that Guttercunts!”
Barbara’s lips twisted in displeasure and ended up glaring at the dead man. Her tone sounded patronizing as she spoke. “Yes through marriage you are but you’re not her biological father.”
The poltergeist’s face contorted in fury and went to open his mouth to toss out a cruel retort when Juno cut him off. “Actually, Geuse is correct. He is now the child’s paternal parent. It’s what you get when you marry a breather. Once you say I do, you take responsibility for any children the breather has.”
Betelgeuse sneered at the boring goody-goodie and ground out a response through clenched teeth. “I told ya the kid was fuckin’ mine. Talkin’ like ya fuckin’ know what your fuckin’ talkin’ about. When we all know that you ain’t been around long enough to know shit, you stuck-up bit…”
Lydia’s loud yawn interrupted the pissed off specter and shifted his attention from the young dead woman to the spent one in his arms. His anger seemed to melt away when his bottle-green eyes landed on her. He gave the thin shoulders a gentle squeeze and whispered tenderly. “Babes, You okay there? You gettin’ tired or something?”
Her drowsy eyes stared up at him, smiling weakly and nodding slowly. “Yeah, I’m suddenly really sleepy,” said Lydia through another yawn and went to lay back on his shoulder.
He lightly kissed the top of her head, asking what she wanted to do. “You think ya want to take a nap, Sweets?”
The pregnant mother’s heavy lids slid closed, and her words slurred slightly. “Yesuuure.” She yawned once more and snuggled into his chest.
Betelgeuse snorted in amusement then turned his attention the other people in the room. “Well folks, I guess we have to cut the inquisition short, cuz my little wife says she wants a nap and a nap she’ll get.” He turned from them and shook the dozing woman, causing her to jump up groggily. “Come, Babes, let’s get you and Bug to bed for a little bit.”
Her husband helped her to stand, and she pulled on his coat to draw his attention. His green pools met her chocolate ones, and she gave him wide puppy eyes while her bottom lip went between her teeth. “Will you come and take a nap with us?”
He drew her into his arms, leaning in to kiss the top of her head softly and quietly answered. “Sure, Babe. If that’s what ya want?
She nodded gently, as a drowsy smile graced her rosy lips, and her glossy head went to rest comfortably against his upper body. “I would like that very much.”
The poltergeist kissed the crown of inkiness and whispered low enough that just she could hear. “Me too, Sweets.”
Her regard went to the people in the room, and the tired woman offered them a weary smile. Lydia wasn’t sure how they were going to respond since she knew they wanted some answers. But the sudden wave of fatigue had abruptly stripped her of any energy and all she desired to do now was get some rest. The young mother hoped her family would understand and wouldn’t try to stop them. She wasn’t certain what her brash and vocal husband would say or do if they did. Most likely nothing good and they would presumably be on their way home. “Sorry guys but I’m suddenly really tired. This pregnancy is already sapping my energy. Do you think we can talk about all this when I get up?”
Delia offered her pregnant stepdaughter a reassuring nod while she eyed the poltergeist warily. “Sure my dear, I gave your room a good cleaning, so the bedding is clean. I set up Lucinda’s crib as well. Go take a little nap to recharge, and then we will talk.” Her father bobbed his round head in agreement with his wife. “Yes, like Delia said, go take that nap pumpkin. We can talk later.”
Relief washed over the exhausted woman, and she turned her gaze to her ghostly parents. They both gave her a nervous smile, though their eyes flicked to her husband, giving him a dirty once-over before their attention came back to her. Barbara sent her a soft and reassuring look, as she spoke. “Lydia, go take a nap, and we will talk to you in a little bit.” Adam inclined his head in agreement and took his wife’s hand. “Yes, go get some rest. We can finish this later.”
Lydia flashed them all another drained smile and lifted a tired hand to wave goodbye. Her beloved husband didn't say a lick to either couple as he guided her out of the room and up the stairs to get some much-needed rest.
Finally, the family knows and seemed to have taken it better than poor Lydia had thought. I really enjoyed having Lydia come to Betelgeuse's defense and felt good to have her rip into Juno. I also enjoyed the interaction between Lucy and Betelgeuse. It seems Betelgeuse has fallen into the father role quite well. It's almost like it just comes naturally to him.
So what did you all think of the chapter? Please leave a review to tell me.
Also, thank you to all that answered my question.
Until the next update :) See ya!
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A Fair Trade