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Forbidden Longing	By : PyramidHead316 Category: Star Wars (All) > General Views: 4286 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: George Lucas owned Star Wars, which is now owned by Disney. This is merely a work of fan fiction. We make no profit off of this fic.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
AN: A note about the love scenes. There aren't any here, but I thought I'd bring it up. Andrea's love scenes tend to be shorter and to the point, while I tend to prefer long, drawn out scenes. You'll learn to recognize the two styles as you go along. This isn't relevant to this chapter, but I thought I'd bring it up. :)
Chapter 8: Threats and Manipulations
Supreme Chancellor Palpatine waited patiently in his office for the famed Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi to arrive.
He’d already decided this was not going to be a long meeting. It would not do to arouse suspicion of any sort on the inquisitive Council member. As Chancellor, his knowledge into matters of the Jedi was supposed to be limited, at least on the outside. To bombard Obi-Wan with questions about things he should not know would be to stir the Jedi Master’s already instinctive distrust of politicians in general. The Council was leery enough of him as it was. If Palpatine suddenly displayed a deeper understanding and awareness of the problems plaguing the relationship between Anakin and Obi-Wan, it could lead Kenobi to wonder just how much Anakin had shared with him not just about their status, but the Order itself as a whole.
That would lead to Kenobi confronting Skywalker about the friendship he and the Chancellor maintained, which in turn, might lead to an investigation of the Chancellor’s affairs on the part of the Jedi Council. Kenobi was not in a rational state of mind; that much was clear from his meditations. Palpatine had to tread carefully if he was to manipulate the situation to his advantage. He could not afford to have Kenobi prying into his matters at this stage of the game.
And manipulate things he would. During his probing into the enlightening flow of the dark side, the Chancellor had discovered something that had truly shocked him, and explained Obi-Wan’s surprising jealousy of Senator Amidala.
It was Anakin. Obi-Wan was attracted to Anakin.
Palpatine couldn’t believe it. Against all odds and conventional wisdom, the great Jedi Master Kenobi had developed an attraction to his own former Padawan. Palpatine had no idea how that could have possibly come about, but he wasn’t about to turn away from a gift from like that. There was a tremendous opportunity here and Palpatine would be a fool not to seize it.
The panel on his com station started blinking. Palpatine pressed the appropriate button to switch on the connection.
“Yes?”
“Chancellor Palpatine? Master Kenobi is here to see you,” his secretary informed him. It was but a mere formality – the Chancellor already sensed the bright presence of the powerful Master outside.
“Send him in,” Palpatine replied.
The door slid open, and in stepped Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Palpatine studied the Jedi’s features closely. Kenobi was trying to put on a polite façade, but the Chancellor could sense clearly his irritation at being summoned here. Kenobi’s distrust of politicians was well known and nobody ranked higher on his list than Chancellor Palpatine.
Fine. Let him try to hide his real feelings from his adversary. It would do him no good. For all of Kenobi’s talents as a Jedi, he was still under the impression that Palpatine was nothing but a greedy, commonplace politician. He was as blind as the Council when it came to sensing the dark side, and he had not an inkling as to whom he truly faced right now. As long as that remained, he was an open book to Palpatine.
“Ah, Master Kenobi. It’s a pleasure to see you. Please, make yourself comfortable.”
“Actually Chancellor, I’m afraid I’m in a bit of a hurry. The Council has several important things to do today,” Obi-Wan said.
“Very well. This won’t take long.”
Palpatine led the Jedi to the vista overlooking the Coruscant cityscape. Obi-Wan waited patiently for him to speak, at least on the outside. Beneath the calm Jedi exterior he wished the old man would just get on with it. He had more important things to do. Like tracking down Anakin…
“I’ll cut right to the chase, Master Jedi. I am concerned about Anakin’s state of mind.”
“Oh?”
“He seems to be very stressed as of late; far more than usual. The last time we talked, he could barely pay any attention to what I was saying.”
“I see,” Obi-Wan said.
“Do you have any idea what might be troubling him?” Palpatine asked.
“I’m afraid I don’t,” Obi-Wan lied.
“I see. A pity. I was hoping you would have some insight, seeing as how you are his closest confidant,” Palpatine said, knowing full well Obi-Wan was lying. He also knew that he was actually Anakin’s closest confidant and not Kenobi, a subject which was a major sore spot for the esteemed Jedi Master.
His insight proved correct. Kenobi’s instincts shot up warily as the Chancellor delivered his apparently innocent statement. The Chancellor seemed unusually worried about Anakin, and those last few words seemed a little too coincidental considering the circumstances. But as he probed at the older man’s thoughts, he realized that no, the man did not know anything incriminating. He was merely concerned about hearing and seeing a supposed friend act in the manner Anakin had.
Obi-Wan smiled inwardly. He had nothing to concern himself with. Palpatine was a fool, and Anakin was fortunate not to have confided in him.
Nonetheless, he was taken aback when Palpatine voiced his next inquiry.
“Tell me Master Jedi, what do you make of the relationship between Anakin and Senator Amidala?”
“What do you mean?” Obi-Wan asked cautiously.
“I mean: are they merely good friends, or have they given you any inclination that they are something more?”
“That’s…an awfully personal thing to ask, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan said.
“Perhaps. But I know Anakin. I know how impulsive and spontaneous he can be.” His voice turned a little more serious as he directed a stern glance at Obi-Wan. “And between you and me, I don’t trust Amidala as much as I appear to.”
Obi-Wan was surprised. Could Palpatine be having the same reservations about Amidala that he himself once had, before he learned the terrible truth that validated all his worst fears?
“We are at war, Master Jedi. We cannot allow ourselves to be distracted by our petty personal desires. Our duty to the Republic must remain first and foremost, above all.” There was just a hint of hardness in Palpatine’s voice.
Whether it was lost on Obi-Wan or not was unclear. “I agree,” Obi-Wan said neutrally.
“Amidala is an idealist,” the Chancellor continued. “However knowledgeable she claims to be about practical matters, she is far too willing to forget them in favor of her own unique judgment when it suits her personal interests. A relationship,” Palpatine stressed the word, “with a Jedi would certainly fall into that category.”
“It seems so tempting, doesn’t it? A romance between a Jedi and a Senator; to believe that love can bloom uncaring of rules or regulations,” Palpatine said wistfully. His expression hardened. “But the fact remains, those rules and regulations are there for a reason. A Jedi is expressly forbidden to engage in any sort of intimate relationship with another person, regardless of their stature in society. A romance between a Jedi and a Senator would lead to scandal, scandal the Senate does not need at this critical time in the Republic’s history.”
“I sincerely hope that is not the case; that they are indeed smarter than that. But Amidala is not one to be dissuaded easily from an idea, and Anakin is far too stubborn for his own good. Certainly when it comes to our good Senator from Naboo. And that could be dangerous if handled in exactly the wrong way. If she were to allow herself to be persuaded by Anakin into a more…personal affiliation…well, I don’t suppose I have to tell you the consequences now, do I?”
Indeed not, Obi-Wan thought sourly.
Palpatine sighed. “Anakin is a good man. I would hate to see his career ruined by a fling with some self-centered politician.”
He was hoping the direct implication would make an impact. It hit dead on. Though Obi-Wan’s calm exterior never changed, the emotions inside the vaunted Master exploded into a sea of turbulent currents. An impressive anger rose the surface, intermixed with jealousy, frustration and indignation, all directed at his former Padawan for turning against everything Obi-Wan had done for him. And beneath it all was a growing, blackening hatred for Senator Amidala of Naboo, one so deep in his soul even Obi-Wan himself wasn’t aware of how engulfing it truly was.
Underneath his sympathetic exterior, Palpatine grinned maliciously with an almost maniacal glee. Oh, this was too rich. It was like the Force itself was handing him Kenobi on a silver platter, ready to mold into a powerful new apprentice.
Through it all, the Chancellor kept his dignified charade, even as Obi-Wan replied to his intentionally goading remarks.
“As would I,” Obi-Wan said simply.
“Promise me you’ll keep an eye on them? I know it’s a lot to ask, but I cannot bear the thought of that fate befalling such an outstanding young man,” Palpatine pleaded with the Jedi, careful not to cross the line into undisguised melodrama. He sighed deeply, putting the last masterful touch on his performance. “I sense all is not well with Anakin and Amidala.”
If he had any doubts about Palpatine’s intentions, Kenobi did not show them. “I will.” A pause. “Thank you, Chancellor, for bringing this to my attention. I will make sure I investigate it further.”
“Thank you, my friend. I’m glad to know there are individuals like you among the Jedi Council. After all, we only have Anakin’s best interests in mind, don’t you agree?”
“Indeed,” Obi-Wan agreed.
“Then I will keep you no further. Thank you for your time, Master Jedi. I’m glad we were able to speak like this,” Palpatine said.
“Yes indeed. It was…enlightening.”
“Yes, I’m sure it was. For myself as well,” Palpatine remarked.
Obi-Wan wondered what he meant by that. But there was no time to contemplate the matter. He really did have a Council meeting in a short while and he was going to be late for said meeting if he dallied here any longer. Besides, it was probably nothing important; just the usual politeness demanded from a politician when ending a conversation.
“Then I take my leave. Good day, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan bowed.
“Good day, Master Kenobi.”
Palpatine watched the Jedi Master leave with piercing eyes. Once he was alone again, the light benevolence in those eyes died to a cold ruthlessness more intimidating than the most hardened criminal in the entire galaxy. No one would believe the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic would be capable of such callousness, but he was, and there was no disguising the satisfaction he felt upon this recent visit with a member of the Jedi Council. Safe in his office, he could finally allow his true self to bleed out into the open until the next visitor arrived some hours later. Palpatine’s lips twisted into a savage grin as he uttered a single powerful declaration.
“You’re mine, Master Kenobi.”
~*~
That same morning, breakfast was a tense affair at the Skywalker’s. Anakin sat in uncomfortable silence at the table, chewing idly on a piece of Shuura fruit while he avoided Padme’s inquisitive gaze. She knew something was wrong. Their lovemaking had been different last night. Anakin was still his usual passionate self, but it seemed like every time they made love in the past few days, it took him increasingly longer to respond to her affections. Those few seconds were like an eternity to Padme, who was used to having her husband all over her the moment he laid eyes on her.
“I was thinking we could spend the day together, today,” she announced out of the blue.
“What?”
“You know, a day off from work and our duties. Just the two of us, enjoying our time together,” Padme suggested.
“But, what about your Senate meeting?” Anakin asked.
“Oh. Well, if the timing is right, I could be persuaded to skip today’s session,” Padme winked slyly at him. Anakin stared at her in disbelief.
“Are you serious? You, skip a Senate meeting?” he asked incredulously.
“Don’t be so surprised. I don’t have to be present at every single meeting the Senate has. Besides, I’ve seen the bills up for debate at today’s session. Trust me, Artoo could come up with more important matters for discussion than that.”
“Oh. Well it sounds nice, but…”
“But what?”
“I kinda of promised Obi-Wan I’d do a favor for him today,” Anakin said apologetically.
Padme’s face fell in disappointment. “A favor?” she repeated. “What kind of favor?”
“I have some research to do at the Temple archives,” Anakin replied.
“Research?”
“Nothing major. Obi-Wan just wants me to check up on some facts for an upcoming mission.”
“But I thought you had no upcoming missions. You guys are still on leave, right?” Padme asked quickly, worried that Anakin might be leaving her again, and so soon.
“Of course,” Anakin assured her. “It’s for a friend of his. He’s been meaning to do it himself, but he just hasn’t gotten around to it, what with his duties to the Council and all,” Anakin finished nervously, really hoping she bought it.
“Okay,” Padme said slowly. Something wasn’t right with this picture. Was Anakin actually passing up a chance to spend some time with her in order to do research at the Temple library?
This didn’t sound like her husband at all. Anakin hated spending time at the Jedi Temple. Why would he willingly go there on his free time, to do a favor for Obi-Wan, no less?
A most peculiar thought struck the Senator from Naboo. Was he trying to get away from her?
“Angel, I swear I’ll make it up to you,” Anakin insisted.
“Fine,” Padme sighed. What choice did she have? If he wanted to spend some time alone away from her, she wasn’t going to tell him otherwise. She wasn’t the kind of wife who would order her husband not to go to a particular place; to stay at home with her if he really didn’t want to.
“Seriously? You mean you’re actually okay with this?” Anakin inquired, not believing his ears.
“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be? It’s not like I have a choice, do I?” Padme replied simply.
Anakin winced at the touch of frostiness in her voice. He could tell when she was annoyed by the way a part of the inflection reserved for her ‘Senator’ persona seemed to slip into her tone. “Angel, I swear, if it were anyone else…”
“I know, I know. Anakin, it’s okay. You don’t have to feel like you need to spend every waking moment of your time with me. It’s okay if you have something else to do,” Padme said.
Anakin smiled. “You’re the best,” he said, giving her a brief kiss on the lips.
The two settled down and resumed eating their breakfast in silence. But it was apparent that there was still an unnamable tension between them, one that did not go ignored by either Anakin or his beloved.
Casting an unreadable look at her husband, Padme Amidala vowed to find out what exactly had come between them.
~*~
Anakin strolled aimlessly through the hallways of the Jedi Temple. He had no idea where he was going, really. As a full-fledged Jedi he had access to virtually every significant part of the Temple. The sparring rooms, the Archives, the hangers housing the Order’s starfighters, the Room of a Thousand Fountains…all of those resources were at Anakin’s disposal to be utilized as long as he desired.
And yet, he had no interest in making use of any of them. Dueling against other Knights and Masters, working on some of the fighter craft, spending a quiet few hours meditating near the fountains; none of the things that might have usually stirred his interest did so this time. All he wanted was to spend some time away from Padme.
He knew how terrible that sounded. It tore at him that he was even thinking that way. He loved Padme more than anything. He absolutely despised lying to her, and it made him feel incredibly guilty for keeping her at arm’s length about anything. She was his heart, his soul…but she was also growing suspicious of what was troubling him. And that was one thing Anakin couldn’t allow to happen.
Distantly he realized that this would only make things worse; that Padme would become even more suspicious if he spent the day at the Temple instead of at home, with her. But what else could he do? He was caught in a mess worse than anything he had experience and it was all his fault. If he had only confided in her that first night, when Obi-Wan first expressed his unsettling desire for Anakin…if he had just done something, anything, other than lie to her, they could have been away from here days ago.
Padme said it herself. The Queen would protect them; they would be safe on Naboo. And neither Obi-Wan nor the Council would have been bold enough to defy an official order of protection from Naboo’s sovereignty. At least, not that Obi-Wan. The Obi-Wan he faced now, that was a different story.
Padme was his life. And so when threatened with her death, he reacted the only way he could think. He had wanted to protect her. But now he was the one who needed protecting.
The irony was not lost on him. He was completely at Obi-Wan’s mercy. No matter what his Master said, how insane or repulsive the request, Anakin had no choice but to carry it out. He was trapped in a horrible situation from which he could see no way out of. If he told Padme, he risked putting her in the path of Obi-Wan’s unshakeable ire. If he didn’t tell her, he would continue to suffer his humiliating ‘sessions’ at his former Master’s hands.
The Obi-Wan from a few days ago wouldn’t have challenged a royal order from the governing monarch of Naboo protecting Senator Amidala and her newly-revealed husband. But this was not the Obi-Wan Anakin had loved and respected as a friend and mentor. This new Obi-Wan was a force to be feared, and it was becoming increasingly clear to Anakin that the Obi-Wan he knew might be gone forever, replaced by this deplorable excuse for a human being. It frightened Anakin to think of everything his former Master had said.
How far would he go? At what cost would he stop to claim Anakin as his? And most disturbing of all, how long would he tolerate only kisses, touches and humiliations from his former Padawan? They both knew what he wanted. It was only a matter of time before Obi-Wan demanded more of him, Anakin was sure of it.
He wanted so badly to tell Padme everything. To hear her comfort him; tell him it wasn’t his fault and that everything would be all right. But that was no longer possible. Not anymore. Anakin couldn’t risk her life like that.
The old Obi-Wan he might have been able to hold off. This new Obi-Wan would likely go through anyone in his path to get what he wanted. The thought shook Anakin down to the core. Why was this happening to them? What had he possibly done to turn his old Master into this?
So lost in his thoughts, he didn’t notice he was crashing into someone until they were both down the ground. Anakin snapped out of his daze to realize he had crashed into none other than Shaak Ti, one of the few Jedi Masters he actually liked.
“Oh, sorry. Are you all right?” he asked, helping the Council member to her feet.
“I’m fine, Anakin. What about you?” Shaak Ti asked while she straightened out her robes.
“I’m okay,” Anakin replied, casting an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, I honestly didn’t see you.”
“It’s okay,” Shaak Ti assured him. Anakin was relieved she didn’t sound angry at being knocked down in the middle of the hallway. He noticed she was staring at him intently.
“You seem rather distracted,” Shaak Ti remarked dryly.
Understatement of the millennium, Anakin thought to himself. “Yeah, I guess I am.”
“Is something wrong?”
You don’t know the half of it… “No, not really,” Anakin replied.
Shaak Ti didn’t look convinced.
“Are you sure of that?” she asked.
“Of course. I just…have a lot of my mind,” Anakin said.
“I see. Well, if you need anyone to talk to, I’m always here,” Shaak Ti said.
Anakin seriously considered taking her up on that offer. She looked so honest, so kind and understanding, as though she truly cared about his well being. Which he supposed she did. Shaak Ti was one of the few members of the Jedi Council who treated him with anything other than flagrant disapproval. She showed him a surprising amount of respect and kindness during his rough upbringing in the Temple, being an outsider and all. And she never rebuked him for not following the Code blindly like Master Windu and Obi-Wan did.
In fact, it could be said that Shaak Ti was almost motherly in the way she treated Anakin away from the eyes of the other Jedi.
Surely she would understand. It wasn’t his fault that Obi-Wan was losing it, was it? He had gotten into this mess by not telling Padme the first time Obi-Wan had made advances on him. Maybe it was time to break the silence surrounding the latest ‘problem’ between him and his Master.
“Wait,” he stopped Shaak Ti from leaving. “Actually, there is something I have to talk to you about.”
The Togrutan Jedi gave him an inquisitive glance. “What is it?”
“I…” Force, where did he begin? How could he explain everything that had occurred over the past several days? He barely believed it himself. Never would he have expected that his beloved Master could turn into this. Obi-Wan had gone from being one of his best friends to his absolute worst enemy, all in the course of a few days. And for what? Because he was attracted to Anakin and wanted to have him? It didn’t make any sense. There had to be some piece of the puzzle Anakin was missing; something he wasn’t seeing as to why his Master would do such reprehensible things to him and Padme.
His discomfort was not lost on Shaak Ti. “Anakin, whatever it is, you can trust me,” the female Master told him gently.
“I know. It’s just…” Anakin swiped a hand over his face. He was tired. Tired of lying to his angel, tired of wrestling with the question of what do to about his horrid situation. And most of all, he was tired of submitting to Obi-Wan’s outlandish requests like some helpless servant.
Like a slave.
Shaak Ti picked up on his weariness. “Why not start at the beginning?” she suggested. Anakin considered that.
He couldn’t tell her everything. Even if Shaak Ti were to believe that the venerable Obi-Wan Kenobi would coerce his former student into engaging in this sort of activity with him, Anakin would be too embarrassed to have her see him in that way. He was ashamed enough as it was of the way he was letting Obi-Wan manipulate him. He wasn’t some helpless child. He was a man, and a man wasn’t supposed to let such things happen to him unless it was in some captive environment where he absolutely had no choice. It may have been old fashioned, but that was the way Anakin felt.
What would Shaak Ti think of him if she learned what he had allowed Obi-Wan to do to him?
What would Padme think of him?
No, she most certainly couldn’t know everything. But if he could persuade her that Obi-Wan was becoming dangerous, then things would be a lot safer for Anakin, and more importantly, for Padme. He couldn’t tell her about certain details of the situation, but there was plenty else he could tell her. Obi-Wan’s sudden and inexplicable bouts of anger, the death threats against Padme, the deceptions he played on them both…none of those things were the actions of a well balanced Jedi Master.
Surely Shaak Ti wouldn’t hold his relationship with Padme against him once she learned what Obi-Wan had done to them. Scandalous though it was, the marriage between a Jedi Knight and a Senator would surely take a backseat to the threat of a Jedi Master on the Council heading down a dark path. And if she was even a little convinced that Obi-Wan was becoming terribly unstable, then the risk he was taking would not have been in vain. Even the Council wouldn’t be able to deny the evidence from another respected Master.
A glimmer of dark satisfaction blossomed deep inside Anakin. Obi-Wan was always raking him over the coals for not following the Code, threatening him with portents of what Council might do. Very well. Let him see what it was like to be on the receiving end of the Council’s wrath, for a change.
“All right,” Anakin agreed. “It’s about Obi-”.
“Anakin!”
The two Jedi turned at the sound of the familiar voice. And sure enough, there was Anakin’s Master. Anakin bit back a curse, though a part of him shook internally with dread. How had he not sensed Obi-Wan approaching?
Obi-Wan sauntered over to them, looking for all in the galaxy as if there was absolutely nothing amiss.
“I’ve been looking all over for you. Where have you been all morning?” he asked his old Padawan.
Anakin winced at the forcibly casual tone. There was an unspoken note of accusation in his Master’s voice. He was already aware of the possessiveness lacing Obi-Wan’s insane attraction to him, but now it appeared that emotion of jealousy was only growing in strength. Obi-Wan was jealous of Padme for being the object of Anakin’s affections. Dangerously jealous, given the constant threats he made to her safety. That didn’t mean Anakin was going to indulge his perverse need to keep his former best friend close to him.
It wasn’t enough that he’d forced Anakin into this situation. Obi-Wan wanted Anakin to accept it; to actually enjoy being with him while he used Anakin’s body for his own deluded pleasure. It was enough to make Anakin sick. The anger rose to the surface and he quickly quelled the volatile emotion before it took him over. Getting angry in front of another Master wouldn’t prove anything, and if he wanted Shaak Ti to believe anything he told her after this, he had to show he wasn’t the aggressor here.
Somehow Anakin managed to look contrite while he apologized to Obi-Wan. “I’m sorry, Master. I was just taking a stroll through the Temple. I guess I just lost track of time.”
“That’s quite all right,” Obi-Wan waved dismissively. “Just be sure to inform me next time of your whereabouts.” He gave a nod to Shaak Ti.
“Master Ti.”
“Obi-Wan,” Shaak Ti nodded back, giving the other Master a kind smile.
“If you don’t mind Shaak, there’s something Anakin and I need to discuss in private,” Obi-Wan stated.
“Of course.”
“Actually, I would prefer it if you stayed,” Anakin remarked, silently daring Obi-Wan to object. He desperately hoped Shaak Ti would pick up on the subtle undertone of his words.
Unfortunately the Force was not with him on this day. “No, that’s okay. I wouldn’t want to interrupt an important conversation. We can speak later, all right?” Shaak Ti said, oblivious to Anakin’s request.
“Fine,” Anakin sighed. He had tried, at least. He would just have to find another opportunity to bring up what was troubling him, and soon, before Obi-Wan had a chance to voice his objections.
“Pleasant day to you, Master Kenobi,” Shaak Ti said in departure.
“Pleasant day, Master Ti,” Obi-Wan replied.
“Shaak Ti,” Anakin tried to interject.
“Anakin, your old Master wants to talk to you. You shouldn’t leave him hanging,” Shaak Ti said, with a chastising look at the boy.
Anakin breathed a sigh of utter frustration. Yes, Shaak Ti was almost like a mother of sorts – too much so now that Anakin needed her help. It was the old “respect your elders” credo working against him. Whereas Anakin needed her to pick up on the tension between him and Obi-Wan, Shaak Ti saw only the façade of Anakin’s old father figure, to whom Anakin should be respectful above anyone else.
Once the female Master was away, Obi-Wan unsurprisingly dropped the benevolent show of politeness.
“What were you two talking about?” he questioned harshly.
“Nothing,” Anakin said quickly. “She asked me if I was all right and I told her I had a lot on my mind. Every Jedi does these days.”
“So, you didn’t let slip any details about our…situation?”
“Of course not. I’m not a fool, Master,” Anakin snapped.
“That’s good to know. I trust you weren’t too distracted in your conversation?” Obi-Wan asked.
“I wasn’t.”
“That’s good. Very good indeed. Well done, Padawan. It’s comforting to know that your ability to keep secrets has some positive uses for it,” Obi-Wan commended. “Just make sure you keep it up.”
“Because you wouldn’t want anything to happen to a certain Togrutan Jedi, would you?”
Anakin’s thoughts came to a screeching halt. “What?”
“Have you noticed how Shaak Ti goes on far more missions than the rest of us on the Council? She’s much like you in that respect. She loves to be out on the field, where she can make a difference,” Obi-Wan observed.
“Let us say she went on one such assignment after learning of some information that she really shouldn’t have. Imagine that she were on her way and her hyperdrive suddenly malfunctioned midway through the journey, leaving her stranded in the middle of nowhere with only a few days worth of rations to survive on. Or maybe she’s on route to some distant world when her fighter suddenly explodes from the inside out. Severe engine failure, no doubt. Or would that be a problem with the fuel tanks? I don’t know. I’m not that familiar with mechanical aspects of a starfighter. But I know enough.”
The statement was as clear as day, and Anakin caught it instantly.
“In any event, it would be extremely difficult to determine from the wreckage, assuming they ever found it, that is. But even if they did, there would be simply be little evidence left to indicate the nature of the malfunction. And there would be no evidence left to indicate anything other than that. It would be ruled a simple, yet tragic malfunction,” the older man continued, rather unnecessarily in Anakin’s view.
“You…You wouldn’t,” Anakin barely got out. He was aghast the menacing words coming out of his former Master’s mouth.
“So you see Anakin, it would be a good idea to mind what you say and do around here. I would hate to see such a tragic accident befall our dear Master Ti,” Obi-Wan finished with an air of casual menace.
“Yes, Master,” Anakin ground out.
Inside he was fuming. How could he do this? This was another member of the Council Obi-Wan was talking about, and one of the better Jedi in the whole damn Order. How could Obi-Wan talk so casually about murdering her in cold blood and then making it look like an accident? She had done nothing to him!
For Sith’s sake, what was wrong with the man?!
Indifferent to the turbulent emotion raging inside Anakin, Obi-Wan nodded in satisfaction. It seemed Anakin was learning after all.
“Very good, my old Padawan. It’s a simple agreement, really. You keep quiet and comply with my wishes, and those you care about will remain unharmed. Understood?”
Anakin nodded his assent.
“Then I’ll be on my way. I have a Council meeting in a few hours. I want to get some sparring done before then.” Obi-Wan gave his former student a stern and piercing expression. “I’ll be expecting you at my apartment tonight. Don’t be late.”
“Yes, sir,” Anakin replied.
He stood there long after Obi-Wan had departed. Other Knights and Padawans gave him mildly inquiring glances as they passed along, but Anakin paid them no mind. He couldn’t believe it, but things had just gone from bad to worse. And now he felt more hopeless than ever before.
Gods, what was he going to do?
~*~
Anakin’s speeder landed on the veranda of Padme’s apartment some time later. He hopped out of the speeder and headed over to the living room, where he collapsed exhaustedly onto the couch. Padme was still at her Senate meeting, which meant it was only him alone with his thoughts.
He felt drained to the bone; like he’d gone twenty sparring rounds with Master Windu and Master Yoda, combined.
Ever since Obi-Wan left him alone in the hallway of the Jedi Temple, he had done nothing but think about the situation that now hung over him like a double-bladed lightsaber. How had he gotten into this mess? As if it weren’t enough that Obi-Wan was constantly threatening the love of his life, now he had Shaak Ti’s well being to worry about too. The way Obi-Wan so casually declared his threat against her life left no doubt whatsoever in Anakin’s mind that he would carry it out if necessary.
If Obi-Wan deemed it necessary, an innocent person would die. And there was nothing Anakin could do about it.
Or was there?
He unclipped his lightsaber from his belt. Turning it over gently in his hands, he examined the contours of the metal cylinder, its polished shine a hint of the pride Anakin derived from the elegantly constructed weapon.
For a while here merely stared at the lightsaber, entranced by its subtle beauty and presence. Funny, how it both reminded him of how skilled he was and how utterly defenseless he had become. A lightsaber was a symbol of power, dignity and authority, none of which were things Anakin had now. He was a slave to Obi-Wan’s whim, too terrified for Padme’s life to say no to his former Master, a man that had undergone a horrifying change in personality these past few days.
Gods, how he hated that word. Slave. It spoke of suppressed freedom and harsh beatings, brutal whippings and transmitters designed to destroy you from the inside out if you tried to escape your Master. He recalled when it first occurred to him, this afternoon at the Temple; how disgusted and ashamed he felt. But that was what he was, wasn’t he? A slave to Obi-Wan’s will, completely at the mercy of his once benevolent Master – a Master who now threatened the life of his closest, most cherished companion.
A lightsaber commanded respect and authority, things central to the life of a Jedi Knight; things Anakin had lost by submitting himself to this perverse manipulation on Obi-Wan’s part.
But he could regain them.
Anakin stood up from the sofa, right hand gripping tightly the lightsaber that had served him well in battle for so long. Despite everything Obi-Wan had done to him, a part of him still cared for the Obi-Wan who had been like a brother to him. He didn’t want to hurt Obi-Wan, but his Master had left him no choice.
This had to end.
Padme was his life, his soul. Without her, he was nothing. He couldn’t allow Obi-Wan to threaten her safety any longer. And then there was Shaak Ti. After what the older Jedi had done for him, there was no way in hell Anakin could leave her at Obi-Wan’s mercy. He had to protect her, just as he had to protect his beloved Padme.
And so he waited. When Padme finally returned from her Senate meeting, he greeted her with a welcoming embrace and a kiss. He talked with her about her day, attended to her needs, and eventually shared a quiet dinner with her afterwards, all the while behaving as if there was absolutely nothing the matter.
Throughout their precious time together, a part of him desperately wanted to grab her and make love to her right there. But he held back. There would be time enough for that later, once he’d dealt with his former Master one way or another. Anakin had to believe that. He would come back and then things would finally be all right for them.
And if he didn’t…well then, perhaps Padme was better off without him.
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Forbidden Longing