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More Than Darkness	By : SaMe Category: M through R > Once Upon A Time In Mexico Views: 4591 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the movie that this fanfiction is written for, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-1
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 6-6
- 7-7
- 8-8
- 9-9
- 10-10
- 11-11
- 12-12
- 13-13
- 14-14
- 15-15
- 16-16
- 17-17
- 18-18
- 19-19
- 20-20
- 21-21
- 22-22
- 23-23
- 24-24
- 25-25
- 26-26
- 27-27
- 28-28
- 29-29
- 30-30
- 31-31
- 32-32
- 33-33
- 34-34
- 35-35
- 36-36
- 37-37
- 38-38
- 39-39
- 40-40
- 41-41
- 42-42
- 43-43
- 44-44
- 45-45
- 46-46
- 47-47
- 48-48
- 49-49
- 50-50
- 51-51
- 52-52
- 53-53
- 54-54
- 55-55
- 56-56
- 57-57
- 58-58
- 59-59
- 60-60
- 61-61
- 62-62
- 63-63
- 64-64
- 65-65
- 66-66
- 67-67
- 68-68
- 69-69
- 70-70
- 71-71
- 72-72
- 73-73
- 74-74
- 75-75
- 76-76
- 77-77
- 78-78
- 79-79
- 80-80
- 81-81
- 82-82
- 83-83
- 84-84
- 85-85
- 86-86
- 87-87
- 88-88
- 89-89
- 77
- 78
- 79
�Salida! Salida!� The raw panic in Aida�s voice was
the only thing that kept Salida from saying �fuck it� and turning back over to
get some more sleep. She was in a bad mood from not seeing Jeffrey for two days
� Sands and his little �crisis� had kept her own husband out of the picture �
not to mention that her hip was sore because it�d been working hard since the
cast had come off two weeks ago. But Aida sounded truly distressed, and it
wouldn�t help anyone if the redhead bit the bullet, so Salida levered herself
out of bed and hobbled into the living room, gun in hand. What she saw made her
drop the gun and nearly fly across the room.
Sands was seizuring. Badly.
Any moment now he was going to buck himself off the couch where Aida was trying
to keep him.
�What the fuck is going on,� Salida demanded, her
hands flying to Sands� chest and neck. As if her touch was magic � or perhaps
poison � the man collapsed against the cushions one last time. His body didn�t
move. His chest didn�t rise. His pulse didn�t throb. There was nothing.
�Oh no you don�t,� Salida whispered, immediately
starting CPR. It had no effect. �Call 911!� Aida had the phone in hand before
Salida could finish giving the order.
When the paramedics arrived minutes later, Sands
still wasn�t breathing. Salida stepped out of the way, allowing the men to do
their jobs. With their equipment and vials of adrenaline, they had far better
results, managing to get Sands� body beating and breathing again. Then Sands
was whisked out the door on a stretcher; Salida detained one man long enough to
get the name of the hospital they were going to before rounding on the shorter
woman.
�What happened? And for fuck�s sake, sit down before
you pass out.� Salida shoved Aida into a chair then took the seat closest to
her. A side table in this instance. �Now spill it.�
�Sheldon��Aida finally whispered. �Sands went after
Sheldon. He just got too dangerous. I wanted him to wait until he was
stronger�but he was impatient.�
Salida snorted, unsurprised by
this news. �What happened next?�
�Nothing. Not for a long time. Sands got warm, and
then cold, and then started trembling. Then nothing. Again. I thought maybe
that was it. That it was over. But then
he started�the seizures came. And I called for you.� Aida closed her eyes. �I
have a really bad feeling about this. Something�s wrong.�
�You don�t know that,� Salida
murmured, reaching into a conveniently placed laundry basket for a pair of
socks. �Are you coming to the hospital with me?�
Aida nodded. �Yes. I have to. I
have to know��
�Don�t talk like that, Grant. Sands will wake up.�
Salida was snappish, but that was only because she feared might happen if Sands
wasn�t alright. �If you�re done
shaking in your boots, grab the car keys and let�s go.�
***
Jeffrey awoke. Nothing more, nothing less. He simply
opened his eyes and rejoined the waking world. He didn�t take a moment to try
and figure out why the ceiling wasn�t familiar or why he felt like he had gone
twenty rounds with a pissed off prize-fighter. He simply opened his eyes and
stared blankly upwards. Someone must have been waiting for him to wake up
because he could hear an anxious voice trying to talk to him, but he couldn�t
focus on it. He heard a steady beeping sound from somewhere close to him and
might have focused on that, but after awhile the sound lost his interest in its
unchanging cadence. Maybe he should pay more attention to the voice�no, now
there was more than one�. They were surely more interesting than that awful
repetitive beeping sound�
"No, it's Jeffrey,"
Salida insisted. "He clenched his left hand."
"Then ask him where the hell Sands is."
Aida was white with exhaustion. She hadn't had more than an hour or two of
sleep in one sitting for three days now.
Salida glared at Aida, irritated that the other woman
apparently thought that she was heartless enough to not care if Sands was alive
or not, but it wasn't worth arguing about. Especially since Jeffrey was still
staring sightlessly at the ceiling.
"Jeffrey, would you at least look at me when I'm
talking to you?" Salida asked gently, stroking her husband's cheek.
Jeffrey blinked at the touch, trying to use it to
focus. This was real, wasn�t it? He had felt that, hadn�t he? He turned in the
direction of the soft voice, trying to remember why it sounded so familiar.
Salida smiled, not moving her
fingers from his face. "Hello, lover. How are you feeling?"
�Vixen?� he asked hoarsely, his
voice rough with disuse. �Real?�
"Yes." Though her smile was real, it didn't
quite reach her eyes. "Do you know what's happened?"
He closed his eyes and shook his head.
�Something�shifted. Different. Hard to focus. Lost. Someone�s gone. Not me, I
don�t think��
"Aida says that Sands went after Sheldon. He also
got rid of Quentin. Is that what you're feeling?"
�Gone,� he agreed distantly.
�They�re all gone. I�m the only one left. Only me��
"What does that mean?" Aida asked
desperately, her voice ringing in his other ear. "Where's Sands?"
Jeffrey turned to this new
voice slowly. �Gone. He�s gone and I�m lost.�
All remaining color leeched away from Aida's skin.
"No," she whispered. "You're wrong. He's in there
somewhere."
�I looked. He�s not there. All the others�oh god�all
the others are looking at me now. They know he�s gone�� His face paled
dramatically then. �Oh they�re loud. So very loud.�
Salida regained his attention. "Tell them to
fuck off." Her eyes were hypnotizing, her voice calm. "Don't panic.
That's what they want. You're not alone. You still have me."
He nodded shakily and allowed his breath to even out.
�There�s only me. Except for�them�all is silence. No Quentin, no Sheldon�no
Sands. He�s not there. None of them are.�
Salida glanced up at Aida, observing how she was
taking all of this. The answer was not
well.
Aida was close to passing out. She could feel the
room spinning around her. Could feel everything dissolving around her. With one
hand she searched for the seat she'd occupied for the past five hours. He's gone. Oh god, what do I do now? How
could he just be gone? How could he
do that to me? Why didn't he ask for help?
Why did he leave me?
Oh god, she couldn't stay here.
"I'm going home," she
mumbled. "I can't stay."
�I want to go home,� Jeffrey whispered in response to
her comment. �Why am I here? I don�t like it here. I just want to go home.�
Salida watched Aida leave, then turned her attention
to her husband. "You can't leave just yet, lover. You nearly died. You seizured. You weren't breathing. Your heart wasn't beating.
We had to call 911. You've been unconscious for the past five hours. You have
to stay for another 24 hours at the least."
�I don�t care,� he said
piteously. �I want to go home. I don�t want to be here.�
"I'm sorry," Salida
whispered. "But you have to stay. I'll stay with you."
�Why? Why do I have to stay?� he snapped at her. �Why
are you forcing me to stay in this fucking awful place? If I say I�m ready to
go then I�m fucking ready to go.�
"You...died..." she hissed back. �Do you
know how fucking scared I was? Isn't it enough that fucking Grant's a widow? Do
you want me to be one too?"
�I just�I can�t stay here, Salida. I can�t, I can�t.�
He tried to sit up in bed in his desperation but Salida�s hand on his chest
prevented him. �Please, Salida. They�re watching. They�re listening.�
"Who?"
�Them,� Jeffrey whispered. �But�but they might not be
real. Don�t know. Hard to tell now. Everything�s funny.�
"They're not real," Salida insisted, not
taking her hands from his shoulders. "The only person watching and listening
to you in myself. And you want me to do that. Right?"
�I don�t know. Do I?� Jeffrey
asked with a confused tilt of his head.
"Do you want me
here?"
�I don�t want to be alone. Not
with them. Leave and I�ll follow. Please don�t leave.�
"I'm not going to
leave," she said softly. "So just relax. Or at least try to."
�Not possible,� he muttered. �I hate hospitals. Or
was that Sands? I don�t remember anymore. Lines blurred, ropes cut. Lost.�
"Do you have any idea of what happened to
him?" Salida asked, not quite believing that Sands was really dead. It
just seemed too...impossible. And it opened up a whole new set of unknowns. And
that scared her.
�Don�t know, don�t know, don�t know. Went after
Sheldon, didn�t come back. Gone. No voice any longer. Don�t want to search.
Don�t want to get lost.�
He seemed agitated, and that was the last thing that
Salida wanted to do to him. "Shh..." she
soothed. "I'm only asking because Aida is going to want to know."
Jeffrey let out a hiss of air between his teeth as if
in pain and nodded. �He got hurt and then he was gone. That�s all I know. He
fought and he fell and all was silence.�
"Alright. Everything is going to be
alright." God, she hoped everything was going to be alright. "We'll
get through this."
He laughed then and it was clear he was dancing on
the edge of all-out hysteria despite her attempts to calm him. �Oh I don�t
think so.�
"Yes, Jeffrey. We'll spend the night here, I'll
take you home tomorrow, and then we'll figure all this out. We'll make it work."
�Make it work, make it work,� Jeffrey repeated as if
unable to help himself. �Not going to make it work. Lost, lost all is lost. No
balance. No rationale. No sense. Falling off the edge of the abyss. Never going
to hit ground. Just going to keep falling and falling and falling. No balance.
Everything has gone sideways and it can�t be straightened.�
"You're just saying that because you're
tired," Salida assured him. "Your mind is in upheaval. But I promise
that it'll get better. Things will settle down."
�You don�t know that,� Jeffrey
said with a decisive shake of his head.
"I'll do everything I can
to make sure that's what happens though. I promise."
�What can you do? You can�t stop this. Even I can�t
stop this,� he muttered, letting his head loll backwards on his pillow as he
stared up at the ceiling again. �Can�t stop it.�
"Shh...just calm down.
I think that will help a great deal." Salida used both hands to stroke his
temples. "Just try to stay calm.
Try to blank out your mind. Don't think of anything but my touch."
�I don�t want to stay here,� he muttered again but
closed his eyes and tried to do what she told him to do. Instructions were
good. He didn�t have to think if someone was telling him what to do. He didn�t
have to fight back the army of greedy voices just to get at his own thoughts if
someone else was thinking for him. How did Sands deal with all of this all the
time?
"Don't think about being here. Just think about
being in my company. That's all you really need, wherever else you happen to
be. We're together, and that's what matters." Salida kept up her actions, wanting to soothe
him to sleep. Perhaps rest would cure some of his ills. "Can you smell my
perfume? Can you feel the heat of my hands? Can you hear my voice?"
He nodded, murmuring an assent. �You smell nice. I
like that perfume,� he sighed. �Makes me want to taste you.�
"Alright." Standing, Salida bent
over her husband and kissed him softly. "Like that?"
He sighed, his eyes opening to look at her. �Not
enough. Never enough. You taste of rain and promise, of life and love. I always
want more. More until I can�t take it any longer. Just kill me, Salida. Let me
find peace within your arms,� he asked seriously and suddenly.
"Kill you! And raise two children by myself?! I
don't think so. You're not getting off that easily, mister." And then she
kissed him again to muffle his protests.
Jeffrey quickly forgot whatever he was supposed to be
arguing for or against as his wavering mind found something much more pleasant
to focus on. He sighed against her lips, pushing his tongue past hers to deepen
the kiss. This was what he wanted. This was what he needed. This didn�t require
thought, only proper response time and unleashed lust.
This time Salida pulled away slowly, her eyelids
heavy. "Rest," she whispered. "And I'll do whatever it takes to
get you out of here in the morning."
�I don�t want to rest. I want you,� he sighed, not
taking his eyes off of hers. Clearly he was exhausted but more than stubborn
enough to ignore that fact for the time being.
"Not here. There's not enough room. But the
sooner you get your rest, the sooner we can go home. Where there's lots of room."
�There�s lots of room at home?�
he asked with a frown. �Then why aren�t we there?�
"Because you weren't feeling well. You had to
come here to make sure that everything inside you was working the right
way."
�It�s not though. Don�t listen
to them. They tell lies. They can�t see. They don�t know.�
She kissed him again, not
wanting to repeat that discussion.
He sighed into the kiss, once more distracted into
the immediate present. �I hurt, vixen. I don�t like it.�
"I'm sorry."
�Why? What did you do?�
"Nothing. I didn't do
anything. I'm sorry that you hurt."
�Oh. I hurt? Yes�yes I hurt.
And I�m tired. Why am I tired? Wasn�t I sleeping?�
"You just need more
sleep. Things will be better after you
get more sleep."
�Are you sure?�
"I'm almost certain. But
even if I'm wrong, I'll still be here."
�Where will I be? Will I be
here too?�
"Yes. You'll be right here.
With me."
�Oh ok. I�d like that. I like being with you. I love
you,� he murmured with a lazy grin, closing his eyes once more. He suddenly
started up out of bed and looked at her frantically. �Will you still be here
when I wake up? Sands wasn�t, he just wasn�t, but you�ll be here, won�t you?
You�re not going to leave. Say you�re not going to leave. You can�t leave. I
won�t let you leave. Please don�t leave��
"Shh." Aida
placed a finger over his lips. "I'd rather die than leave you. I promise to be right here, holding your
hand and waiting for you, when you wake up."
He looked as if he wasn�t quite sure he believed her,
but she had promised. He nodded slowly and laid back down, not relaxing in the
least but seeming to edge closer to sleep anyway.
"Here. Hold my hand. Then
I won't be able to leave."
He took a hold of her hand in his now cleaned and
re-bandaged left tightly, bringing their joined hands to rest on his chest.
This settled, he let his eyes drift shut once more.
Salida stayed awake for a long time. So much had
happened. There was so much to think over. So many plans to make. But
eventually she fell asleep. And when she woke up, the entire nightmare started
over from the beginning.
***
�This had better be real,� Jeffrey grumbled, closing
the door behind him. �Because one more day in that fucking hospital and I was
going to start killing nurses,� he said between gritted teeth, cornering Salida
against the wall and nipping at her neck.
"Oh...I can assure you its real," she
murmured, tilting her head back to give him better access. After spending a
week by his side in the hospital with only brief trips home to shower, change,
grab a bite to eat, and make sure that Aida hadn't done herself in, Salida was
more than overjoyed to be home herself. Especially now that Jeffrey was more
than halfway in control of himself and in a mood to help her remember what they
could have lost. And confirm what they still had. Unlike Aida who had no one,
they still had each other. And Salida intended to keep things that way.
Jeffrey smiled and kissed her franticly, having never
felt hornier in his entire life. After a week of imposed chastity and arguing
with the fucking doctors about whether or not it was safe for him to go home.
He had had no less than a seizure every other day the past week-probably more
but he couldn�t remember any of them so he wasn�t entirely sure-and after each
one he would wake up not remembering anything for the first few minutes of
awareness. They seemed to have finally stopped however, and it was about
fucking time. He truly would have started killing people if he hadn�t gotten
out of there when he did.
"I don't suppose you in a mood to be gentle, are
you?" Salida's voice was a husky whisper that only inflamed his lust. And
then she laughed when he took her mouth in a bruising kiss, although she did
have the sense to kiss him back. In doing so she wrapped her arms around his
neck and hauled herself up against him, enjoying the contact as much as he did.
�Not even a little bit. Does that bother you?� he
asked a moment later, his voice as languid and full of dark promises as hers
was. He was in the mood to take her without stopping, to slake his lust as his
current attitude demanded.
"It might take some planning and careful
positioning, but I don't seem to have a problem with that."
He groaned at her wiliness and moved as close as he
could to her, determined to feel her body rubbing against his, when he froze.
"What is it?" she
murmured against his lips as her hands worked to find bare skin.
�I feel nothing,� he said disbelievingly. Well that wasn�t
strictly true. He did feel a near killing amount of arousal and lust, but
beyond that�nothing. The will was more than there, but the means had abandoned
him.
"That's because you're wearing too many clothes,"
she muttered, finally managing to yank his shirt out of his pants.
�That�s never stopped me
before,� he growled, his disbelief quickly turning to anger.
Salida pulled away. "Why
are you getting mad?" And he was, she could see it in his eyes.
He laughed then. �Oh, that�s rich. I spend a week waiting
for this, I�m currently so fucking horny that I could go all night without
respite, and oh wait. I can�t go at all. I
feel nothing,� he hissed.
"I don't understand..." Salida started to say
before she cut herself off. Her eyes widened. "You mean -"
�Yes I fucking mean,� he growled, pushing himself away from
her. �Isn�t life just fucking beautiful?� he asked, his voice dripping with
malice.
"Maybe if you're just
patient for a little while -"
�Does it look like I�m in the mood for patience?� he interrupted heatedly.
"Don't snap at me,"
Salida said sternly as she approached him. "I'm trying to help."
�Just leave me alone,� he grumbled, looking away from her in
his frustration. �I can�t stay here.�
Salida blinked back her hurt at
his rejection of her. "Fine."
He didn�t care that she was hurt. He didn�t care that he was
leaving her side after she too had been frustrated this past week. He only
cared about finding an outlet for this mountain of tension and frustration
threatening to crush him. He was going to paint the town red with blood
tonight. �I�ll be back later,� he promised, already thinking of murder. �I�d
ask you to come with me-it�d be better that way-but you won�t, will you?�
"Pregnant women are not noted for their speed or
stealth," she said stiffly. "Do me a favor and don't get caught,
would you?"
�I won�t. I haven�t yet. I�ll come back to you. I swear it,�
he vowed. �But I need this or I�ll lose what little sanity I�ve managed to
claim for myself these past few days.�
Salida nodded, understanding but
not liking.
�I�ll be back soon,� he promised softly, grabbing his
knives-he was in no mood for the impersonal touch of guns tonight-and with one
last look at her he walked out into the night to find his peace in the screams
of others.
***
A soft knock on the bedroom door made Aida aware of
her surroundings once again. The room was growing dark in the hours before
twilight as the sun moved to the other side of the house. The bed she lay in
was cold and rumpled. She hadn�t moved from it since that day that Jeffrey had
woken in the hospital and said those fateful words.
�There�s only
me. Except for�them�all is silence. No Quentin no Sheldon�no Sands. He�s not
there.�
At first she�d given in to shock, but held out hope.
Each time Salida came home, she hoped for news. Every time a telemarketer
called, she�d hoped it was Sands demanding that she get her ass to the hospital
that instant. But there was never any
news. Never a familiar voice at the other end of the line.
As time passed, her hope died a painful death each
morning and each evening, leaving her with little energy to do much more than
breathe. If not for the baby, she wouldn�t have even bothered to eat. She only
bothered to bathe when she could no longer stand the smell of herself. And she
lost herself in sleep any time she could.
The tap came on the door again,
once again rousing Aida from her thoughts.
�Go away,� she murmured, not at all in the mood for
company. If it wasn�t Sands � and he would have burst into the room, desperate
to be with her � then didn�t want to talk to anyone. She didn�t want pity. She
didn�t want sympathy. She just wanted to be left alone with her thoughts.
Whoever was trying to get her attention either didn�t
hear her or didn�t care because Aida heard the door open.
�Leave me alone.�
Salida raised her eyebrows at the sight that greeted
her. Apparently Aida hadn�t moved a muscle since the day before when she�d
checked in. But Salida didn�t have the heart to comment on it, and she
certainly didn�t have the heart � or the courage � to comfort the other woman.
Just the thought of what she would feel if she were to loose Jeffrey in the way
that Sands had been lost� She shivered and thought about her now prowling
husband. He�d best be taking pains to be careful.
�I just wanted to let you know that we�re both home.�
The sooner she relayed what she�d interrupted Aida�s misery to say, the better
for them both. As she�d suspected, Aida didn�t reply. �You�re welcome to stay
��
�Please. Go away.� Aida didn�t now whether to feel
overwhelming anger or overwhelming sorrow at Salida�s �charity.� She wanted
both to stay and to flee this place where she and Sands had last been together.
Everything in the room was a reminder of him, comforting and tormenting at the
same time. And she couldn�t tear herself away from that. �Leave me alone.�
Aida didn�t realize until the shadows in the room
turned to impenetrable darkness that Salida had left.
But then it didn�t really
matter either. Sands was gone. Nothing would ever matter again.
Without realizing it, Aida�s hand started rubbing her
abdomen, unconsciously holding on to the last part of Sands left to her.
***
Jeffrey prowled the city of Dublin at night, avoiding the
drunks that roamed the streets with practised ease. He moved silently and no
one took notice of him. He was on the hunt and clearly his prey had no idea.
His knives were in opposite sheathes on his belt, in plain sight for anyone
clever enough to take notice of the dark figure marking their steps. No one
had. But they would. They would see the knives flash and they would run and
they would scream and he would chase. He would catch them. He didn�t bother
chasing those whom he knew he couldn�t catch. His prey once marked wasn�t
suffered to live. They were his and they knew it.
Women, women, always women. He killed men only when they
were stupid enough to get in his way. It was women he sought, women he chased.
Blondes were best. Their hair stained red with sticky hot blood. But it didn�t
really matter who they were. He wasn�t entirely sure how he chose them, he
simply looked for one and then he knew. Sands stalked-had stalked-them then,
sometimes following a single victim throughout the night for as long as it took
to find his moment. Jeffrey wasn�t like that. He saw what he wanted and he took
it. It was as simple as that. He didn�t plan, he acted. He wasn�t organized
when it came to his killing either. He liked the mess. He liked the feel of a hot
spray of blood on his cheek like droplets of a warm summer rain. It calmed him
and at the same time polarized him into action.
There! There she was. A long-limbed brunette with a nice
smile. She was with friends, two other equally beautiful but ultimately
forgettable women. Three was a magic number. He would kill them all. But
quickly with the first two, wouldn�t want them to get away. And too much
screaming tended to draw too much attention. But he wouldn�t have such problems
tonight. They were clearly drunk and all wearing too-tall high heels that would
hinder escape. They were trolling the bars, looking for a good time. He would
be having a good time but he doubted they would.
He did follow her and the other two for awhile, needing to
get them alone. He couldn�t have his fun in a crowd, much as he might have
wanted to. He would be seen, remembered, caught. He had promised vixen that he
wouldn�t be caught. Some care was needed here. There it was. The moment.
Clearly they were looking for a new bar to populate, tired on their heels,
looking for a shortcut. Travel down this alley. Safety in numbers, right?
Wrong. Jeffrey took a knife in each hand and descended on them swiftly.
The first had her throat cut before she could even hope to
scream, and the second wasn�t far behind. Stupid women, really. Didn�t they
realise that there were monsters out tonight? It didn�t matter now. They�re fun
was over and his was just beginning. She was saved for last. She did scream and
he shivered in pleasure at the sound of it. She tried to run but tripped as one
of her heels broke. It was fate. She was meant to fall into his hands tonight.
She begged him to let her go, that she had money that she would give him
anything for her life and he just laughed. Oh he�d missed this. He let her
scream a few more times before slitting her throat like he had the others. It
was so much fun to watch them gasp for breath that simply wasn�t there. And the
way blood sometimes passed through their gaping lips, it was exquisite to
watch. But death was only the beginning�
He dragged himself away from the corpses many long minutes
later, having had more than his fill of blood and flesh for the evening. He had
been in a mood tonight, it was clear. Their deaths had been quick, but his play
had not. He purposefully left his victims� teeth in tact; hopefully they would
be able to identify what was left of them through their dental records. They
were going to have a hard time of it otherwise.
He sighed happily, making his way home with blood on his
hands and lust on his thoughts. It was time to go home to his wife. He had such
wonderful things to show her.
***
Salida was asleep when a hand on her breast woke her.
For a moment she laid still and allowed the appendage to explore, but then she
woke a bit more.
"Did you wash?" she
asked, sleep still evident in her voice.
He sighed in regret. �Yes. Didn�t want to, but yes. I like
seeing you covered in blood. I never get to anymore.�
"You wouldn't like it at the moment," she
muttered. Just the thought was enough to make her a little queasy.
�Perhaps,� he growled, moving overtop of her. He wasn�t
wearing anything but a lustful gaze and it was clear that he not only wanted
her, but was more than able to do so. �Kiss me,� he demanded.
"This better not get to be a regular occurrence,"
Salida muttered as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I don't like the
thought of your finding murder more arousing than my luminous self -"
He cut her off as he took what he had demanded, a bruising
lustful kiss that left her bottom lip bleeding. He just kept kissing her until
she pushed him away for air.
"Wait for me to catch up, would you?" Salida was
more than willing to while away a few hours, but her body was still
half-asleep. Her husband's attentions were bordering on unpleasant.
Jeffrey growled and moved his mouth downward to her breast,
suckling on it in a desperate attempt to bring her to the aching point of
arousal he was currently at as quickly as possible. While his talented mouth
worked on her chest, his deft hands found her other breast and clit in turn,
adding their ministrations to the charge.
"Oh...that's-that's better..." Salida stretched
under his hands, rubbing her body against his in the process.
He just hummed and his attentions grew even more amorous,
his desperate need for her blatantly obvious. He was aflame with lust and every
movement of her body against his only added fuel to the fire.
"Let me tie you up,"
she whispered.
He pulled up to look at her then, his breath coming in
pants. God he wanted her right fucking
now but something in the way she asked made him nod without question. Her
eyes danced with arousal and need as well and he couldn�t help but respond to
that.
"Good boy," she whispered, rolling out from
under him and digging in a drawer by her bed. Within seconds she had produced a
few scarves and within a minute, she had him pinned to the bed.
"We can't take risks, now can we?" she murmured,
settling herself astride his body, most of her weight borne on the knees to
either side of his hips.
�What risks?� he asked, his voice rough with arousal. He
wanted to buck up against her and very nearly did, but he knew she wouldn�t let
him have what he needed quite yet so he stilled himself by sheer act of will.
"The babies," she murmured against his lips.
"But this position should be very kind to all of us."
�Promise?� he asked
breathlessly.
"Cross my heart, hope to le petite morte." She grinned
against his lips before kissing him deeply.
He groaned into the kiss, arching against her and already
trying to pull at the scarves. The way the smooth silk rubbed against his
wrists oddly aroused him even more until he had to stop pulling at his bindings
lest lose himself entirely.
"Do you want me, Jeffrey?" Her whisper was soft
and hot against his jaw as she moved her lips. Her hands held his head in place
and her knees clenched his ribcage. She was everywhere, yet not in the place he
most wanted her. And she knew it.
�Oh god yes,� he gasped, meeting her gaze as best he could
when all he wanted to do was throw his head back and moan in lust and
frustration.
"Tell me what I look like
and I'll give you what you want."
�A goddess,� he gasped. �A beautiful succubus whom I�m more
than willing to give everything to.�
It wasn't quite what she'd wanted - she'd wanted him
to describe her in all her maternal glory so she would know that he knew just
who he was with. It was silly, but she needed the reassurance. Especially since
he'd had to go kill untold numbers of people to get into the mood. But it would
be unfair to demand more of him when he was in this state - and when she wasn't
really in the mood to be patient herself - so she took pity on her poor husband
and slowly sank down on him, moaning as she felt her body take all of him in.
Jeffrey couldn�t watch. He knew that one sight of her
riding him; her rounded belly thrust out in front of her as she moved over him
would send him spiraling over the edge and he didn�t want this to end yet.
�Vixen, oh god, vixen,� he moaned her name, arching up off the bed as best as
he could while gasping as the sensation of the silk on his wrists tugged at him
again. He was being pulled in a million different directions all at once and he
had no where to go but upwards.
"Say my name," she
softly begged as she leisurely took her pleasure from him.
�Vix�Salida, Salida, my
Salida,� he breathed, watching her avidly now, unable to tear his eyes away.
�My Salida,� he repeated again in a possessive growl, despite his clearly
submissive position.
"Yes, yours," she agreed, leaning down to
kiss him under his chin as if to placate him even as the rocking motion of her
hips sped up.
The conflicting sensations were swiftly driving him
mad, and he arched his head back finally, his eyes rolling up in the back of
his head and his mouth open and gasping as he let his passions overtake him. He
was still gasping her name though he wasn�t as aware of that fact as he had
been a few moments ago. He could feel his control cracking and his whispered
mantra of her name crescendoed into a desperate plea.
Straightening, Salida let more of her weight rest on
his hips rather than on her knees. It
made all the difference, causing her to moan harshly as she started to rock and
rotate her pelvis against his, not letting an inch of him escape her for even a
moment.
Jeffrey was still crying out her name when his climax
found him like a quick shove from behind. He bucked against her frantically,
needing more movement than she was allowing him but not able to ask for it. It
didn�t really matter. He found release all the same.
Salida came as he did, throwing herself forward to
bury her scream in his chest. Normally it wouldn't bother her to allow her
passion to be heard throughout the entire house, but a part of her mind
remembered Aida's misery, and she didn't want to unnecessarily add to it.
Some many minutes later Jeffrey finally forced his
thickened tongue into working again. �Just leave me like this. I don�t want to
move,� he murmured, not caring about anything else.
"Too bad," she murmured back as she first
weakly pulled the ties binding his wrists free then pulled his arms around her
as she rolled onto her side. "We came so very close to loosing all this.
So very close."
�I�m still here, Salida. You
haven�t lost me,� he whispered against her skin.
"But I could have. You
know? We never were sure what loosing Sands would mean."
He frowned and nodded. �I know,� he murmured. She was
right. He had almost been lost and he knew it.
"I...I feel...sorry...for Aida," Salida whispered.
"She's not handling any of this well."
�I can�t say I blame her,� he muttered, thinking of
how he�d be if he lost her. �But I can�t do anything for her.�
"I know. Are you sure that Sands is really gone? And not
just hiding away somewhere?"
He sighed. �I don�t know, vixen. I looked for him
when I first noticed he was gone. If he�s hiding out in here he�s doing a
fucking good job of it,� he muttered. �And if that�s the case I�m going to kill
him for forcing me to deal with all of this.�
"But you don't think
that's likely."
�He would have come back by now,� Jeffrey said with a
shake of his head. �For Aida�s sake at least.�
"Yes." Salida was quiet for a few moments
before murmuring, "I told her she could stay with us. Not that I think we
could really make her leave at the moment. She hasn't even left her bed for the
past week."
Jeffrey nodded and sighed, trying his best not to
feel obligated towards her and failing miserably. �Well I�m sorry for that but
there�s nothing I can do. I can�t bring Sands back. I don�t even really know
what fucking happened to him,� he muttered defensively.
"I'm not trying to make you feel responsible for
anything. I was just letting you know that she'd be around. And probably not
very friendly. After all, she's burned all her bridges and now she's stuck in a
foreign country with someone who used to be her husband except her husband's
dead and the body's still alive and kicking."
�Maybe she can go back to her parents,�� Jeffrey
suggested softly. �I don�t think she�ll want to stay around here for long
anyway. Not while I�m around and Sands isn�t.�
"You're right. About her
probably not wanting to stay." The conversation lagged again.
�As much as I�m sorry about what happened, I don�t
really want to have to worry about her right now, vixen. Selfish of me, yeah
probably, but I don�t care right now.�
"It's not selfish,"
Salida murmured, kissing his neck as her hands started to explore again.
�Oh?� he asked with a sigh and
smile as he relaxed under her touch. �What is it then?�
"Natural." Her voice
was a whisper. "It just hits too close to home."
�For you or for me?� he
responded in equally whispered tones.
"Both of us I think."
He stopped to think about that; about how close he
had come to the end. The thought was staggering and he pulled her tight against
his chest without thinking about it. �That could have been me,� he whispered,
the notion seeming to fully hit him for the first time. �I could have been gone
forever, not Sands.�
"I know." She wrapped her arms around him
and clung just as tightly to him. "That's all I can think about."
�I could have lost you,� he
gasped. �I can�t lose you, Salida. I can�t.�
"You won't."
�How can you be sure? You can�t
know. Aida didn�t.�
"If we can survive my falling off a balcony and
Sands�...death...then we can survive anything."
He chewed on this for a long while before finally
nodding. She was right. They could and they would. They had survived worse. �I
love you, Salida. I love you very much.�
"I know." Under her ear, his heart was
racing and his body was vibrating. The enormity of what had happened had
finally struck him in a way it never had while he was in the hospital. In a way
she was glad - because she didn't want him to take any of this for granted -
but she was saddened too. It was a lot of weight to bear.
He just kept holding her, trying to put his thoughts
anywhere but on what ifs. He couldn�t allow himself too dwell on what might have happened or he knew he would
become obsessed by it. He had to keep his focus here and now. He had to
appreciate what he had. He had to appreciate what he could have lost. His life
with her was so fragile that it could shatter with just one wrong word and yet
it was strong enough to bear weights that would crush either one of them alone.
Together they were strong or they were nothing. He thought he understood that
now.
"I never really understood what you went through
when I was the one in the hospital
until now," Salida said softly. "Quite frankly, I don't know how you
did it."
�I survived,� he murmured with
a weak smile.
"If you felt anything like
I do, then it was by the skin of your teeth."
He nodded. �Yes. That�that was
what it was like,� he said softly.
"I hope neither one of us
ever has to go through that again."
�Knock on wood,� he muttered
under his breath.
"Got any in mind?" Salida's hand stole down
Jeffrey's chest, clearly intent on reaching a specific destination.
Such a comment spoken so innocently past his wife�s
lips startled a genuine laugh out of him, effectively dissipating the tension
that had been building upon his shoulders like that. �I believe you�ll
something to meet your needs a bit further south,� he agreed with a smile.
She grinned...and grabbed his
knee.
�Hm,
not quite. Shall I direct your search?� he offered languidly.
"That's alright. Just tell me what direction to
go in." Her hand started creeping up his thigh.
�You�re definitely on the right track and you�re
definitely getting warmer. Can you feel it? How all the blood in my body
battles to serve you? That�s it, keep moving your hand up my thigh, you�re
getting warmer still.� His voice was growing rough as he directed her, his
breath quickening. �Between my legs, down the line of hair from my belly
button, there�s your destination,� he assured her.
"Oh really?" She
mischievously reached between his legs to pinch his bum.
He hissed, lifting up off the bed in mild irritation.
�Oh come on. I gave excellent directions. It�s not my fault you�re a bad
driver,� he said with a smirk.
She pinched him again, her
fingers starting to edge into dangerous territory.
�Oh hell. You�re in the right area. You�ll find your
way eventually,� he murmured. �When you hear me gasp and moan in pleasure
you�ll know you�ve found the right spot.�
"Those would be dangerous words if I were a
man," Salida smirked, just waiting for Jeffrey's reaction.
He laughed breathlessly, more than willing to face
anything and everything she threw his way. He was full of reckless lust and
abandon and he was more than willing to let her play. �What can I say? I enjoy
living dangerously. It�s a rush; a thrill. I�m an exhibitionist, a voyeur, a
sadist and a masochist�I live for sensation. I live for pleasure and pain. I
live for your love and attention. God just do whatever you want. As long as I have
my fun in the end I give you carte blanche.�
Admittedly, that wasn't the reaction she'd been
hoping for, but that was part of Jeffrey's charm. He always managed to surprise
her.
"I'm going to make you regret those words before
we're done, lover," Salida promised before setting to work.
Her words were prophetic.
***
A month - an agonizingly hopeful, desperately lonely,
devastatingly bleak month - passed with all the kindness of a file being rasped
against bone.
Sands wasn't coming back.
It'd taken all the pain of that month for Aida to
accept it in every corner of her being. For her unflagging optimism to accept
that never again would she hear her husband accuse her of being optimistic. For
her heart to accept that it would never beat in tandem with his. For her arms
to accept they would be empty for a long time to come. For her nightmares of
his homecoming to fade away into the dull dreams of simply existing. The only thing that made it all bearable was the growing
evidence of what her love had left her. A child who would never know the parent
that hadn't wanted to let it down.
She couldn't stay in this place. It was too strange
and too full of him. Nothing was
familiar except for the things and places that held some memory of him like
ill-wishes, always waiting to leap out at her when she was the least prepared,
sometimes bringing her to her knees with the pain they inflicted. Anything was
better than this. Even going home.
Decision made, Aida packed a small suitcase with some
clothing - enough to last her a week or two - and any other possessions that
held any meaning for her. Two stuffed animals, one barely recognizable, one not
even broken in. Saturninus would go to their child, Aida had decided. It was
the most she had to pass on of Sands. She also packed her marriage license, her
wedding picture, and the book of Shakespeare engravings that he'd given her for
her birthday. Her best present.
She called the airport and made arrangements for
tickets and a taxi to pick her up in the morning. It was surprisingly easy
considering her heart felt like it was going to burst at any moment. And then
that was that. So easily she left behind this life she'd traded everything for.
Not so easily was it walked away from...but she didn't have any other choice. Living
in this house with living, breathing reminders of everything she'd lost - a
husband's love, the closeness of another soul, the anticipation of a growing
family, daily happiness - was too much for her to bear.
All that was left was for her to tell her roommates
of her plans. And there was no better time to do so than the present.
Wandering into the living room - that's all she
seemed to do anymore. Wander like a wraith from room to room, searching for
something that would never be found - she found Salida and Jeffrey sitting
together on the couch. He read the newspaper while she worked on her improving
knitting skills. The scene was painfully domestic; it strengthened Aida's
resolve.
"I'm going back to the States in the
morning," she announced, seeing no reason to pussyfoot around the issue.
Jeffrey set aside his paper at Aida�s sudden
statement, frowning as he looked at her. He hadn�t seen much of her at all this
past month-he figured that she wouldn�t want to be reminded by the sight of him
so exact to that of the husband she had lost-and to see her now was a shock.
She looked�lifeless. She looked as if she was barely hanging on to life itself
and he wondered if he had ever truly looked as hopeless as she did right now.
�To your parents�?� he asked softly.
She nodded. "If I can get there. For all I know
my passport is on the watch-list at the airport. But I can't stay here any
longer."
�You�ll go prison if you�re caught,� he stated
gently, knowing that she must have considered this long and hard but compelled
to say it anyway. �Don�t get caught, Aida,� he said simply. That was as close
to admitting that he�d miss her should such a thing befall her as he was
willing to get.
Aida shrugged. "I was
wondering...I'd like his ring."
Jeffrey blinked, having foolishly overlooked such a
detail. He had just gotten so used to seeing it there and she hadn�t spoken of
it since he had left the hospital that he had truly forgotten it was there. He
nodded and pulled on the platinum band. It didn�t want to come off, almost as
if some part of him that was still Sands was grabbing a hold of it, but Sands
was dead and the ring came off his finger without too much trouble. He handed
it to her wordlessly, already feeling somehow naked without it even though he
had never took notice of it after the first time.
"Thank you." Aida curled her fingers around
the small piece of metal so slowly that it looked as if the action pained her.
"I have the number for one of the cell phones. I assume that I'll be free
to call should I ever need anything?"
�Half of the money is yours, Aida,� Jeffrey said,
assuming she meant Sands� fortune. She looked at him with such pain filled eyes
at the mere mention that he reevaluated his view. �Anything, Aida. Just call.
You�re still�family,� he said very softly.
She let out one rusty crack of laughter at that
before stilling herself once more. "Don't get sentimental on me now,
sport. You might never get me off your doorstep."
�Yes, well we couldn�t have that. You�d block the
doorway,� Jeffrey said wryly before growing serious. �Be safe and don�t do
anything stupid. And take care of yourself and the munchkin,� he said softly.
"I plan to." Aida glanced at Salida who'd
stayed silent through all this. The women just nodded at each other, both
acknowledging the fate that had given one woman her husband and taken away the
other. Aida was too tired to be bitter, and Salida was too mindful of how
easily things could have turned out the other way to be more than thankful.
"Well...I'm going to turn in. Early morning
tomorrow and all. I'll be gone before you get up, most likely."
Jeffrey nodded. �Good night then and good luck,
kitty. If you make it to the pride tell them I said howdy.�
"They don't know about you. I think it'd be
safer if they didn't." On that note she turned around and fled back to her
solitary room though her pace was slow.
She didn't sleep. She just watched the stars and
wished with a bone-deep longing that things could have been different.
***
Aida turned her dusty, non-descript car into her
parent's driveway. She hadn't slept since arriving back on US soil, both too
nervous on account of being caught by the law and seeing her parents, and too
miserable to sleep. She just wanted to get home. Wanted to see if she could
still go home or if she needed to seek alternate lodgings.
Her homecoming coincided with the falling light of
evening. The summer had clearly passed and now it was closer to wintertime.
Aida was grateful for the shelter of dusk. She didn't really want any of the
neighbors to know she was here. Part of her knew that this was just a temporary
stop on her way to true; solitary safety, but she pushed it aside. She didn't
want to think about running. For five weeks now she hadn't been able to catch
her breath. She wanted her mother.
I hope they're
home, she mused when she saw that the pickup was missing. The pickup was
her dad's baby while her mom owned the family car, but that didn't mean that
both were out. After all, Aida hadn't exactly called ahead and made
arrangements. Doesn't matter. I know
where the key is. The prospect of an empty house was disheartening though.
She hoped someone was home.
Wearily climbing the porch steps, her bag thrown over
one shoulder, Aida made her way to the front door. As a beloved daughter of the
house, she could walk right in. But she wasn't feeling very beloved. Or even
much like a daughter. She'd become a stranger to herself. So she knocked on the
door and waited for an answer.
Susan Grant was curled up on the couch reading a book with
the television on in the background. It was a little distracting, but she found
she didn�t like how quiet her house was now that she was the only one home. Her
children were all grown and settled into their own homes and her husband was
away on business. Her house was empty and her heart was hurting. She understood
this and couldn�t help but feel foolish because of it. There were plenty of
times when her children were young that she would have done anything for even a
few moments to herself in peace and quiet and now that she had those moments
all she wanted was the noise back. She laughed at herself softly and turned
back a page in her book that she had just glanced over as she became lost in
her thoughts. She had just about settled back into reading when she was
startled abruptly out of the silence by a hesitant knocking at the door. She
frowned and rose to her feet. Who could be calling at this hour? Jack wouldn�t
have knocked and her children would call before coming over. So who? She
instantly became suspicious and more than a little wary of who might be behind
her door but she shook her head and told herself to stop acting like a ninny.
Burglars wouldn�t knock. Would they?
Susan took a breath and threw open the door, nearly falling
over in shock as she saw who stood there knocking. �Aida? Is it really you?
What are you doing here?� she asked incredulously, too shocked by the sight of
her youngest daughter standing before her to let her into the house.
All her composure was ripped away in that moment. As she was
blinking rapidly to keep her tears from falling, Aida became a young girl
again, wanting her mother to make all her hurts go away. "Sands is
dead," she whispered. And then sure burst into tears.
�Oh honey,� Susan whispered, the sight of her daughter falling
into tears galvanizing her into action. She moved through the door like a woman
possessed and had Aida into the house and sitting down on the couch in an
instant, somehow managing to bring her bags in and shut and lock the door
behind her as she went. �Come here, firefly. You�re home now. You�re safe,� she
soothed, taking Aida into her arms.
"He was just trying to keep me safe, Momma. That's all
he wanted. I pleaded with him to wait until he was stronger, but he didn't
listen. He didn't think he could afford to. He didn't want the baby and I to be
in any danger. So he went. It was so horrible to watch. He kept seizuring.
And then he stopped breathing. And then...and then he was gone."
Susan didn�t fully understand this but she didn�t ask about
it either. �It will be alright, Aida. I know you�re hurting now, but it will be
alright. You�ll see. You can stay here with us. We�ll help you raise your
child. We�ll always be here for you, Aida,� she assured her with a soft smile,
forgetting all that Aida was wanted for by the police and CIA in an instant of
pure motherly love.
"No! It's not
alright!" Why couldn't her mother see that? "My husband is dead. The father of my child is gone. "
�This would have happened sooner or later,� Susan said
resolutely, assuming that the police had been the ones to kill Sands. �Did you
think that they were just going to stop chasing you? You were leading a very
dangerous life, Aida. Something like this was bound to happen. Count your
blessings that it happened now to him rather than later to you and your child.�
Aida pushed her mother away and stared at her as if she were
a monster. "You don't understand," she whispered. "He
didn't...he didn't turn himself in,
or something. Sands was a schizophrenic. He had multiple personalities. He died
fighting himself. For me."
The hurt at Aida�s gesture was clear on Susan�s face, but
she spoke on as if unaffected by it. �Why did he need to fight�himself in the
first place? Why didn�t he get help? This could have all been prevented with
medication. I know. I�ve done my research since you told me about him. He could
have been better. He could have not been a murderer. It�s his fault that he
was. Did he even offer to change for you? Did he even care?�
"Momma..." Couldn't her mother see that she was
ripping the pieces of her heart into tiny shreds. "When Papa dies, is this
what you want me to do? Remind you
about every little thing he ever did wrong and then reassure you that you're
better off that way?"
�Your father�s not a serial killer,� Susan said darkly.
�Don�t you ever compare him to that
man again.�
"And my husband loved
me. He died for me. Don't you ever slander him in front of me
again." Aida was trembling with anger. "God, I knew you wouldn't care. I knew
you'd react this way. But I at least hoped that you'd..." Aida threw
out her hands, totally and completely at a loss for words.
�That I�d what, Aida?� Susan asked with a weary sigh. She
loved her daughter with her whole heart but she was as stubborn as a mule
sometimes. It didn�t help that she herself was the same way. �That I�d look
past everything he�s done now that he�s dead? I�m sorry you�ve lost him because
I know you loved him, but it�s hard to give more than that.�
"So you can't even find it in your heart to comfort
me?" Aida shook her head and looked away. "Can I at least spend the
night? I know now that it was a mistake to come here, but if I don't get any
sleep, I'll drive into a ditch or something."
Susan bit her tongue to say that she had been trying to comfort her when she had been
yelled at. �You�re welcome to stay as long as you wish, Aida. It�s still your
home.�
"No it's not, Momma." Her tone was
defeated, exhausted. "Not when I get a lecture instead of the comforting
arms I needed. That's what got me this far you know. I hoped that for once you'd admit that Sands had done
something admirable. 'Greater love have no man than that he lay down his life
for another.' Isn't that what the Bible teaches? And yet, I have to sit here
and listen to you tell me, 'Oh well, it was going to happen sooner or later'?
What the hell is that, Momma?"
�What do you want me to say, Aida? I�m sorry he�s dead. I
am. I know you loved him, and he must have loved you to do what he did.� She
sighed and nodded. �You�re right. I�m sorry. I believe you when you say he died
honourably and I will not speak ill of the dead any longer. Forgive me, Aida. I
just-I have been so worried about you that I can hardly think straight
anymore.�
Aida shrugged as if to say "whatever." She really
didn't have it in her to fight. "I'll go to bed now," she whispered
as she collected her bag.
�Would you like me to wake you for breakfast?� Susan asked
softly, understanding Aida�s weariness.
She shrugged. "When's Papa due back?"
�Tomorrow afternoon. He�ll be
glad to see you.�
Aida shrugged again. "Goodnight, Momma."
�Goodnight, Aida,� she whispered, watching her go in
silence, hating the defeated hunch of her shoulders and hating herself for
helping to put it there.
***
Aida walked down the hallway, very much aware of her
last stay here. Against her better judgement, she'd left Sands to be
interrogated by her parents. She'd kept her ears open as she'd drifted off to
sleep in her childhood room.
Opening her bedroom door was...difficult. Every
smartass comment Sands had made about the teenage d�cor was ringing in her
ears. She tried to shove it aside as she kicked off her shoes and threw herself
on the bed. She wasn't successful. The entire purpose of coming back here was
to escape the memories that haunted her, but all she could remember was the
passion with which he'd made love to her in this very spot.
The sobs started. She hadn't truly mourned her
husband before leaving Ireland. Coming back here was the shock she needed.
Dreaded, but needed. He wasn't coming back to her. Ever. She was alone. She was
a widow.
Aida cried into her pillow - a mockery of all the
times she'd done something similar after loosing no-account boyfriends. She
cried until she had no tears left. No tension left. No emotions left. It was
only then that she was able to fall into an exhausted sleep that gave the
oblivion she sought but little rest.
Susan listened from her room across and slightly down
the hall. Whatever other thoughts she had, she was sorry that she couldn't
comfort her baby girl.
But at least Aida was alive.
And free.
She wouldn't be sorry for that.
***
�I know she�s grieving Jack, but you can�t expect me to feel
sorry for the fact that he�s dead!� Susan hissed, clearly piqued and her anger
unleashed. �He was a killer and she was acting like he was some kind of saint!�
Aida had finally woken up, although her head was
fuzzy enough to make her feel as if she'd been drugged. Her eyelids were stiff
with dried tears, and probably bloodshot, but she didn't particularly care.
After all, Sands was dead. What reason did she have to care about her
appearance anymore? If it hadn't been for the baby, she wouldn't have even
gotten out of bed - all her brave words about leaving today notwithstanding -
but she needed to eat. So she had gotten
out of bed and silently started down the hallway. That's when she'd overheard
her mother's comments. But she honestly couldn't bring herself to care. It was
no less than what she'd expected.
"Love covers a multitude of sins, Suzie."
Jack Grant's voice was weary, but he was obviously trying to calm his wife now.
"You know our Aida. She's always had a heart for outcasts. Always had a
knack of loving the unlovable. Remember how she was when she was in grade
school and we couldn't let her read or watch anything that had an animal's
death in it? Remember how she tried to start a petition against the death
penalty when she was a junior? Aida has always chosen to overlook the flaws of
others. And yes, it's gotten her in trouble before, and probably will again.
But her love is pure. And it's not our place to judge. Not our daughter. Maybe
her love was enough to change Sands in the end. We don't know. And it's
certainly not our place to tell our daughter who she is and isn't allowed to
love."
It was hard to argue with her husband�s logic, he had
known her long enough to know what buttons to push to win an argument, but he
just didn�t understand her worries. �She�s blind, Jack. And she�s in denial.
She told me that he died somehow fighting myself, but I don�t know what to
believe.�
"I'm not in denial, Momma." Aida stepped
out of the hall, ignoring her mother's gasp of shock; she could only assume it
was at her appearance. "Sands was fighting to regain control of his mind
when he seizured five times. The reason he was
fighting for control was because one of his alternate personalities tried to
strangle me. Soon after the seizures stopped, so did his lungs and his heart.
The paramedics couldn't bring him back. I'm not in denial and I'm certainly not
blind. I never once forgot what my
husband did for fun. I never once didn't feel the pain that caused. But he needed me. And I needed him. And I'll
never forgive myself for bringing about his death."
�How could you possibly think that you brought about
his death?� Susan asked incredulously, trying very hard to keep her cloak of
reason around her when all she wanted to do was run to wrap her daughter in her
arms and never let her go. She was�broken. There was no other word for it. Her
once vivacious and carefree little girl was now only a shell of her other self.
�It wasn�t your fault, Aida.�
"I didn't watch my mouth." Aida shrugged.
"A dangerous mistake. And once an attempt was made on my life, Sands felt
it was necessary to hunt down the one in charge. If I hadn't made that one
comment, he'd be alive still."
�If he had done something to�dampen the�others,� this
was all so very strange to talk about, �then you wouldn�t have been in danger
and he�d still be alive as well,� she argued.
"You don't -" Aida swallowed and closed her
eyes in pain. "You didn't know
Sands. Not really. Asking him to take medication was tantamount to me telling
him that I wouldn't love him unless he was...normal. It'd be like a parent not
loving their child just because it had a sickness it couldn't control. That's
what his parents did to him. They
taught him that their love was conditional on his sanity. And that's no love at
all. How could I demand that...knowing the damage it would do? I did tell him
how I felt. And he was considering it. But it was all very...complicated."
�Explain it to me, Aida,� Susan said softly, withering under
her husband�s even gaze. She was so tired of this; tired of alienating the
daughter that she loved and had missed so much. �Help me understand him.�

Aida came into the room and took a seat. "He was
always in so much pain," she whispered. "Always so scared of doing or
saying something that would drive me away.
Terrified of being left alone. Before he knew me he said he'd never
known love. He'd been schizophrenic for as long as he could remember. He grew
up with no friends except for those in his mind. His parents were more
concerned with business and their image in society to even notice that there
was something wrong with their child.
"He said that he...that he killed," Aida
had to force the word out, "for fun. But I never quite believed him. If it
was merely for fun, he could have given it up. I don't -" There was that
word again. That present tense. "I didn't
understand that part of him. But the desolation in his eyes...that I
understood. I wanted it to go away. I loved making him laugh." Her eyes
slipped shut as she remembered. "There were times he was so childlike,
needing to be reassured that I really did love him. That I wouldn't just walk
away from him and disappear. That I wouldn't punish him if he said something I
didn't like. He was always expecting to be punished. Always. He wanted me to punish him sometimes, because he understood
that. He didn't understand love. I had hoped that this baby..." No, that
was too painful a topic.
"When we came to visit...he was so nervous.
So...so close to a nervous breakdown. I told him he didn't have to come. But he
came for me. Do you understand that? He forced himself into a situation he
didn't have the skills or mental capacity to deal with just for me. He wanted
you to like him. He said that you'd worried about me enough during the years
that I'd left home. He wanted us to reconcile. And he came with me to support
me because he knew it would be difficult.
"And in the days leading up to my birthday, he
gave me a present every single day for over a week. He wanted to spoil me. Said
I deserved to be spoiled. I knew what he was trying to do; he was trying to
show that I hadn't made a mistake by marrying him. He was trying to give me
reasons not to leave him. I did what I could to reassure him, but I don't know
if I every truly drove away that fear."
Aida had to stop and try to relax the knot of tension
in her throat. "He had no idea how to love someone. But he was trying so
hard. He wanted to love me the way I loved him. He wanted to be worthy of my
love. I told him he didn't need to be, that I loved him anyway. But he wanted
to learn. And he was."
Susan sat for a long time in silence, soaking in all
that Aida had told her, trying to reconcile the man she had build up in her
mind-the murderer-with the man Aida spoke of-the husband. She couldn�t do it.
The two simply could not coexist. He had to be one or the other. He couldn�t be
both. And yet, he was both. She had looked into her daughter�s eyes as she
spoke of the man she had loved and knew
she was speaking the truth. She was not blind nor in denial. She knew who the
man she had married was and she had accepted him anyway. He was a vicious
murderer-the CIA and police had eagerly provided pictures of his victims in an
attempt to sway her to their point of view-and a loving husband. She didn�t
have pictures proving this, but she didn�t need them. She could see the truth
of those words in Aida�s eyes. �He did love you, Aida. I knew that from the
moment I saw you together. He stood up to us for your sake and I should have
remembered that before judging him. I know that now,� she whispered.
Aida opened her eyes and stared sightlessly at her
parents who were sitting side by side.
"He died a month ago," she whispered. "I didn't believe
it at first. He promised me he would be careful. That he would come back. So I
waited. I was in a strange country, I didn't know anyone. But I waited. After
all, how could he just...die? And I'd promised to never leave him. Not like
everyone else in his life had. If I left and he came back, what would he think?
But...but finally...I knew. He wasn't - isn't - going to come back. He would
have by now. I miss him."
Susan frowned, not understanding. �We would have come
to the funeral, Aida.� She didn�t know if she spoke the truth or not, but she
hoped it was truth. �I wish I could have been there for you. You shouldn�t have
had to go through that alone.�
Aida shook her head.
"There was no funeral."
�He was cremated then?�
"He always liked fire," Aida murmured
absently, hoping her parents would leave it at that. "Hello, Papa."
Jack reached across and took his daughter's hand in
his. "I'm very sorry, firefly. Sorry you had to go through that alone. Sorry
that you had to go through it at all. But you're here with us now. You can stay
until you're ready to move on."
"Thank you, Papa. I won't
stay too long."
�What?� Susan asked in a clearly disbelieving voice.
�Where will you go? Aida, you have to stay with us. We�ll help you with your
child. You don�t have to raise it on your own.�
Aida just smiled sadly. "I
can't stay, Momma."
�Why not, for heaven�s sake?�
"If you thought about that for a little bit,
you'd know why." Aida swallowed back another round of tears as her father
squeezed her hand.
�What?� Her eyes widened as realisation set in like a
stone on her heart. �They can�t possibly-you didn�t-we�ll explain it to them. I
won�t let them take you from me.�
"There will be no explaining, Momma. Sands is
dead. That will make them furious. They'll be out for blood." She
shrugged. "Don't worry. I've learned a thing or two about hiding. I'll be
fine."
�For god�s sake, Aida. You�re speaking of spending a
life on the run with your child. How can you expect to live like that? We�ll
make them understand. You haven�t hurt anyone, they�ll see that. They have to.�
Aida laughed weakly, her first experience of
amusement in a long time. "Just...stop. I can't think about any of that
yet. I can't."
"We understand." Jack looked at his wife
then reached out and pulled her to him with his other arm. "You need a
place to rest. To recover. We won't badger you about anything until you're
ready."
"Thank you," Aida
whispered, closing her eyes again.
�You don�t have to thank us,� Susan said softly.
�You�re our daughter. You�ll always be our daughter. You have a place here for
as long as you need it.�
Aida nodded. "I
know."
�Do you want to talk to any of your brothers or
sister? Do you want us to let them know you�re here?�
"No. I...I'm just not up
to seeing a lot of people."
�I understand,� she said with a sad smile. �I am
sorry for you Aida. I can�t imagine what it must be like,� she moved a little
closer into Jack�s embrace, �but I am here for you. I know how that sounds, but
I�m your mother so I think I can be forgiven for the occasional clich�.�
"Yes. I suppose so." Aida yawned and forced
herself to sit up. "I need to eat something before I go back to
sleep."
�What would you like?� Susan
asked eagerly, desperate to do something for her.
"Nothing too heavy. I
don't even feel hungry. But I need to eat something for the baby."
She nodded. �Pasta?� she offered, trying to suggest
something to tempt Aida�s palate.
Aida shook her head.
"Whatever you make will be fine, Momma."
�Alright,� she agreed, moving gently out of Jack�s
embrace to make Aida some food, needing to be put to use before she lost
herself in tears for her daughter and her coming grandchild�and even the loss
of her son-in-law�that attempted to overtake her.
Aida and Jack just sat in silence in the living room,
Aida occasionally squeezing his hand when a particularly nasty wave of pain
swept over her. Jack took it without complaint; this was his baby girl who had
just been thoroughly beaten up by life, but this was a grown woman too. A woman
with responsibilities that she wasn't trying to shirk. As much as he ached for
her, he was proud of her as well. He just hoped she got what she needed out of
her stay here. And that she would leave safely.
***
Christmas. Aida could barely face it. There wasn't
much she could do though, besides leave town and she...she wasn't strong enough
for that yet.
I'm not exactly
strong enough for this either, she thought as she found herself surrounded
by her considerable family on Christmas Eve. The family always descended on their parent's house. To change that would have
been very suspicious...and she hadn't had the heart to deny her mother her
presence. That was true. And so far she couldn't say that any of her siblings had
ventured so much as a shadow of an 'I-told-you-so.' Not that the furtive looks
they shot her when they thought she wasn't looking were any better. Between the
utter togetherness that every single
member of her immediate family had with their significant other, the thought of
Salida and Jeffrey alone and happy, and the knowledge that this would have been
her first Christmas with Sands... Needless to say, Aida wasn't the picture of
Christmas cheer, although she tried to keep a stiff upper lip so as to not ruin
the holiday for everyone else. Even if she did have to excuse herself a few
times an hour to collect her runaway emotions.
Poor Aida,
she thought as the family gathered at the dining tables - they had to have
three different tables to seat everyone - for dinner. That's what they're all thinking. It didn't help that she refused
to wear bright colors. Today she was dressed in a forest green that made her
skin translucent and that complemented the bruises circling her eyes. Aida took
a perverse pleasure in that even though she knew she shouldn't. It also didn't
help that her mother was keeping her neatly tethered to her side...as if one of
her other children was going to do something to cause Aida to collapse into a
puddle of grief and tears.
Perhaps skipping town wouldn't have been a bad idea. I'll do it tonight. Sure, there'll be
holiday traffic, but anything will be better than this. They'll all understand.
They'll probably be glad I'm
gone. I won't ruin anyone's Christmas
that way.
"Aida? Did you want some
cranberries?"
Dazed, Aida looked down to see that it didn't really
matter if she wanted any or not. There
was already a bright pile on her plate. That was another disadvantage of having
the entire family congregated. Everyone was trying to force food down her
throat, or a blanket around her shoulders, or encouraging her to cry, or to
turn in early....
Bah-humbug. I'm such a Scrooge.
Susan had been trying to keep up appearances for the rest of
her children and grandchildren; trying to be cheery in this time of celebration
and family, but she couldn�t keep up the front forever when constantly
confronted with the utter bleakness that never seemed to leave Aida�s eyes, the
heavy sorrow that threatened to bow her frail form in two. She was at her wit�s
end searching for ways to get her to take care of herself; reminding her of her
child seemed the only thing that even worked anymore and only just. She didn�t
want to bring her daughter into the spotlight like this in front of her
brothers and sister and their families, but she needed looking after. �Aida why
don�t you try and eat something and then we�ll open a few presents?�
Aida understood that her mother was trying to help...but it
wasn't working. "Actually I think I'll lie down after dinner. But don't
let me keep the rest of you." Aida watched her mother nod even as
disappointment crept into her eyes. She was sorry for that, but what could she
do? There was nothing she could imagine right now that would be worse than
sitting around and opening presents.
Susan had been about to say something to Jack in an attempt
to get her family�s attention away from her youngest daughter, but it turned
out she hadn�t needed to. It a moment that later seemed like something out of a
nightmare or particularly bad movie, a sound of crunching wood echoed
throughout the room startling everyone but what was worse were the men that
soon came pouring in, each one dressed head to toe in matching black uniforms
with matching black guns pointed at them all. She screamed and noticed that she
wasn�t the only one.
The assault team quickly surrounded the dining family, their
guns drawn and their voices demanding compliance. The family was cowed easily
and the leader of their squad strode forward and placed a hard hand on the shoulder
of the one they had come for. �Mrs. Sands, you�re under arrest for aiding and
abetting a known fugitive from the law.� His voice rattled off her Miranda
rights as he pulled her to her feet and led her towards the door.
Susan watched this all in abject horror, disbelieving what
was going on before her very eyes. An even voice man spoke quick instructions
to Jack as she sat at the table in utter shock. She vaguely caught the words
�not to leave the premises,� and �further questioning,� but that was all she
could glean from the man�s clipped speech. She could just watch as her daughter
was taken from her; her soul withering in her chest at the look of utter relief
on Aida�s face. It was almost as if she had been waiting for this�
It was cold outside, and windy. The chillness cut
through Aida's shirt as if it wasn't there, but she barely felt it. She
was...she'd been expecting this. She didn't give the man guiding her by the
stern grip on her arm any trouble. There was no point. The only thing she regretted
was that her family had been involved and were probably scared to
death...especially the kids. Yes, Aida decided, she did regret that part. She
should have listened to her instincts and not her heart. If she'd left even the
day before, perhaps this could have been avoided.
Officer Susannah Cartwright, CIA paced back and forth not
bothering to hide her agitation as she waited for the S.W.A.T. team she had
sent into the innocuous-looking home to come back out with their prisoner. Many
of them had muttered about having to work on Christmas Eve, but she had ignored
them all. Some things were more important than holidays. Revenge, for example�
�Ah, Mrs. Sands,� she said delightedly upon seeing Aida led
out of the house. �How wonderful it is to see you again.� I�m going to kill you, you bitch. If I can�t have your husband, at
least I can have you. �You mind telling us where your husband is?�
Aida recognized the woman who'd once held a knife to
her throat. After dealing with Sands and his alternate personalities, it wasn't
so strange to deal with this one woman.
"Sands is dead."
�Convenient,� Susannah murmured, clearly not believing her. She lies! She has to lie! You will be
avenged! She assured her two ghostly companions.
"Not for me." The seriousness of the situation was
slowly making itself known on Aida's numbed mind.
Susannah allowed this woman to see one of her true smiles
then. It was full of madness, she knew. She had seen it enough times in the
mirror to be cautious as to whom she showed it to. But that didn�t matter now.
No one else had seen. �Indeed not, Mrs. Sands. You�re not the type to enjoy
prison, are you?�
"I wouldn't know. I've never had the pleasure."
Aida tilted her chin up, knowing she had to be strong. That glint of madness
that the agent had revealed only reaffirmed that. Aida knew how to deal with
this.
�It will indeed be a pleasure. I can assure you that. A
frail little thing like you won�t stand a chance.� She leaned in very close
after the men holding her had cuffed her hands behind her back. She was mad,
not stupid. �You�ll be someone�s plaything within the first week. I can
guarantee it,� she whispered for Aida�s ears only. �If I can�t kill you for
what�s he�s done to them, at least I�ll know you�re suffering.�
"I know how to take care of myself. Especially against
people like you," Aida whispered back. "I did learn a thing or two
about dealing with madmen during my marriage." Not to mention she had a
fortune at her disposal for bribes and such.
Susannah just smiled, but Aida could see that she had
definitely found one of the agent�s buttons and pressed it hard. �Get her out
of my sight, gentlemen. And do remember you�re given free rein to use whatever
force you deem necessary. She�s married to a sadistic murderer. There�s no telling
what levels of depravity she�s embraced.� With that, Susannah turned on a heel
and went back to her car. The night was chilly but nowhere near the icy cold
that ate at your bones back in DC this time of year. She missed it. She missed
her friends. The whore will pay. I
promise you, she assured their reflections in the rearview mirror as they
watched silently from the back seat. You
will be avenged.
***
"What's that?" Salida asked as Jeffrey came
inside, bringing not only a gust of cold air with him, but a manila envelope.
They rarely got anything more than junk mail, although Salida had subscribed to
a parenting magazine, and Jeffrey ordered the occasional fun
"something." But that stuff usually came wrapped in brown paper.
Life had been quiet since Aida had left. Jeffrey
still had his moments. He was still adjusting to life - or at least a mental
state - without Sands. But there hadn't been any big bumps yet. Salida could
only pray that would continue to be the case. And in the meantime, she wondered
what was in that envelope.
�I don�t know yet,� he murmured under his breath,
turning the package over in his hands. The return address didn�t bode well.
�It�s from a prison,� he muttered. �Brookridge State
Penitentiary.� He sent Salida a glance before opening the package swiftly. Its
contents dropped to the ground in his haste.
Salida struggled to get out of her seat. Being eight
months pregnant hadn't done much for her mobility; Jeffrey had picked up the
newspaper pages by the time she'd reached his side, but at least now she could
see for herself instead of waiting for him to tell her.
"Oh my god. Is that...?" The woman in the
picture on the front page was nearly unrecognizable, but there was something to
the tilt of her chin as she was led through an angry crowd of people by two
uniformed police officers that made any other identification pointless.
�Spitfire,� Jeffrey whispered,
unaware of the slip. �She�s in prison.�
Scanning the article, Salida saw it was worse than
that. Aida had been in jail for three weeks, had been hurried into a trial -
mainly because she had waved the right to counsel - and had been found guilty
of aiding and abetting Sands in just a little less than half of the murders
that the federal prosecutors knew about. She was due to be sentenced by the end
of the month with the smart money being on life imprisonment. And that was
without the trumped up charges of manslaughter and striking an officer.
"Grant took a swing at
that CIA bitch?" Salida whispered.
Jeffrey didn�t hear her. He was still�aware, yet he
had no control over anything. His body wasn�t his own. It was as if someone
else had taken the controls for awhile and forced him to settle back and watch.
It wasn�t something he had experienced since Sands had left� He tried to warn
Salida; tried to warn her that he wasn�t in control, but he couldn�t move. He
could only watch.
Someone-who may or may not have been Sands-let out a
keening moan and dropped to his knees, hands tightening on the edges of the
newspaper as he stared at in disbelief. �No, no, no. Not her. Not Aida. Oh god,
oh god. Can�t be real. Nightmare,� he moaned, unaware of his audience. He was
only aware of the grainy picture of his wife staring defiantly at the camera.
He brought the picture to his face and closed his eyes. This couldn�t be real.
"Jeffrey?" Salida hesitantly reached down
and touched the man's shoulder - about all she could do without taking a seat
on the floor.
He flinched away from her touch but didn�t react to
the name. He just kept his eyes closed and his nose pressed against the ink of
the newspaper. The smell of it was oddly comforting. The image it bore was not.
"Sands?" It's not possible. He's been gone too long. He's dead. Isn't he? Is this him? Or just a remnant? Salida didn't
have any answers and she didn't like that.
The man blinked at the name. Was that who he was? It
sounded familiar, but he couldn�t be sure. He turned towards the voice and
looked at her shrewdly. The woman who stood over him was familiar as well.
�Sunrise?� No, that wasn�t her name was it? It was close, but something was
wrong� He gave up trying to remember what it was after a few seconds and turned
his attention back to the news clipping. He traced trembling fingers over
Aida�s picture, his face contorted in a mixture of confusion and grief.
"Sands?" Salida's voice was filled with
amazement and more than a little shock. "We all thought you were
dead."
�I was,� he said simply. It seemed like the right
answer. �Not-Aida killed me. Then I killed them both. Got lost in the abyss.�
"That was nearly two
months ago, Sands."
His head whipped around towards her, his eyes going
wide in shock. �No,� he whispered. �I wasn�t�I couldn�t�I would have known?� it
was a halting question as he wasn�t sure of the answer.
"Apparently not. That must have been one hell of
a fight."
�She slit my throat. Left me to die. Shot them both.
Couldn�t wake up. All was darkness until now. I�m Sands?� he asked softly.
"I think so." That was a good question. Was he Sands? What was something that
only Sands would know? "Tell me, why were you out that morning that you
met Aida?"
�I was given freedom. Two days. Wanted more, didn�t
get it. Came back to find you. Salida. Weren�t there. Ran into Aida. Knocked
her down�� he trailed off, clearly lost in the memories.
"Sounds like you're Sands
to me."
�I-I have to see her. Aida. She�s�she�s caught. She
can�t be caught. Not because of me. She can�t, Salida. She can�t.� His face
lost all colour and his eyes widened in horror. �My child. What of my child? I
have to go to them.� He struggled to his feet, clearly set on rushing out the
door to Aida�s rescue when Salida stopped him.
"You can't just go rushing out the door without
a plan, Sands. That's a sure way to yourself caught. And they won't let her go
just because they've got you. Especially when the last CIA bitch is still
involved in this. She'd probably arrange for Aida to be killed in jail just to
torture you. We've got time. She won't be sentenced for another two
weeks." Salida was quick to cut off the argument she could see forming by
saying, "Aida's strong. You can see it in that photo. Perhaps a little
underweight, but she hasn't been broken. She can wait until you can coldly plan
how to get her out of all this. You know she wouldn't want you to risk
yourself. Just the fact that Aida managed to get this paper to us means that
she's got friends on the inside. Everything is going to be fine. But only if you calm yourself down and plan this down to the
minutia. Can you do that? For Aida?"
He was on the cusp of arguing that he needed to go to her now, but what Salida said appealed to
his reborn sense of rationale. He nodded, not trusting himself to speak.
"Alright. Jeffrey will help you." Salida felt her
lips turn up in a wry grin. "Hell, you can hire an entire team of
mercenaries if you have to. Just plan what you're going to have to do to keep
her safe. I think Jeffrey and I can both understand how you feel."
�Does she,� his throat closed up on him and he had to take a
breath before going on. �Does she think I�m dead?�
Salida's slight smile disappeared. "Yes. She stayed
here for a month, waiting for news of you. But you never showed up, and she
couldn't take it."
�She thinks I�m dead,� he whispered, his voice distant.
�She�s thinks I�ve left her. I promised I wouldn�t.�
"She wasn't mad at you, if that's what you're worried
about. I think she was more upset with herself for not stopping you."
�She blames herself?� That was
so much worse.
"I don't know," Salida quickly backpedaled.
"We didn't really talk about it. She didn't really talk much at all before
she left. One day she was lying in bed, a miserable lump, and the next she told
us she was going back to her parents."
He nodded, trying vainly to take
all of this in. �How-how long has she been gone?�
"A month or so."
�I�ve been gone for two months?� he had heard but he did not
yet believe. It didn�t seem possible. Only moments ago he had been in Aida�s
arms assuring her that everything would be alright. Everything hadn�t been, but
surely it couldn�t have gone that badly.
"Yes," Salida replied
softly, knowing this must be a lot to take in at once.
�I don�t believe it.� He wasn�t really arguing with her, he
was simply stating a fact. He would not, could not believe that two months had passed
without him being aware of it.
"That doesn't make it any
less true."
No it didn�t, but he needed proof. �Prove it to me.� It
wasn�t a demand; more of a desperate plea.
"Look at the date on the
newspaper."
It was something that should have occurred to him earlier,
but he wasn�t berating himself for his nonobservance. He searched the paper for
the date and his nightmares were realised as it glared at him. �It�s not
possible,� he whispered, and yet it was. He had missed two months of his life.
�Oh god,� he whispered, his mind reeling with the truth of it.
"Shh, shh,
shh," Salida quickly hushed, trying to calm him.
"If you were gone that long it was because you obviously needed it to
recover. It wasn't wasted time. You just need to stay calm. Remember your goal.
What's your goal?"
�To see her again. To get her out of that place,� he
whispered after taking a moment to himself.
"Right. And what do you
have to be to do that?"
�Plan. Calculate. Stay calm,� he answered evenly and Salida
saw that he indeed did seem to grow calmer as if he needed to speak the words
aloud to achieve it.
Nodding, Salida asked, "Do
you want to read this article?"
He shook his head with a slight flinch. He wasn�t nearly
ready for that. �Need to find out about the prison, the guards, everything.
There will be one we can bribe. Just have to find them,� he murmured to
himself, a plan already forming in his mind.
"Yes. That's good. We even have a time and date for her
sentencing. We know right where she'll be, when she'll be there, probably even
what route they'll take from the prison to the courthouse. This isn't
impossible. Just delicate."
�I will get her back.� Some of his old steel found its way
into his voice but it was still a shadow of the resolve he had once known.
"Do you need to be angry,
Sands? Would that help you?"
�Anger is a good motivator,� he murmured offhandedly. He had
never had a terrible difficulty with anger. Sure he knew he had a temper and it
did get the better of him occasionally, but overall he was more than adept at
twisting anger into cold and calculated cruelty. While Jeffrey had learned to
play, it had been Sands who had first succumbed to the desire to make art of
his victims before and after their deaths. Jeffrey was all about the swift kill
while Sands took pleasure in the act itself and what happened afterwards. He
needed that coldness now.
"They arrested her on Christmas Eve. She was
with her family. They took her away from that and put her in jail. She refused
to defend herself. She pled guilty - probably trying to get a lesser sentence.
She cooperated with them at every step. But they want to put her away for the
rest of her life. They'll take your child from her and leave her in a cold,
grey cell. There's enough law enforcement agents with a vendetta against you
that she'll never get time off for good behavior. And why? Because they think
you're dead and she's the only one they'll ever be able to punish. We both know
that's nothing but shit. She didn't do anything, did she, Sands?"
Sands shot her a gaze full of such undiluted fury
that she was unconsciously glad it wasn�t directed at her. �They�re all going
to die. And not quickly if I have anything to say about it,� he answered
coolly. �At least, not the bitch. I�ll make her wish she had died that day.�
His face twisted into a grim mockery of a smile. �Long distance sniper rifle.
Take out the guards easily. But I�d need a partner to get her in the
aftermath.� He glanced at Salida�s fully pregnant form for the first time. �Not
you.� That plan wouldn�t work without someone else and he didn�t yet know of
anyone else to ask.
"Would that work? What if there's too many
guards? She's bound to be a high-profile case. What if someone gets her out of
the car before this as yet unfound partner can get her? You need something
closer."
He nodded. �Could just pull up along side the
motorcade and blast them all to hell with a machine gun or something but again,
there�s only me. I don�t trust mercenaries,� he muttered, vainly wishing that
he and Jeffrey were separate entities. He was certain the two of them could
finish this in record time.
"Then we find a way to get
you inside the car before she does."
He nodded. �Back to bribes. Greed is easy to manipulate once
you find what the person wants. Bribe the guards transporting her; arrange to
be one of them in disguise. Kill them all from within; there shouldn�t be many.
Drive away with her, worry about the rest later.� It didn�t have the death toll
his rage demanded, but it seemed like the safest plan at the moment.
"Right. Once she's
safe."
�Yes. Once she�s safe we�ll be free to kill them all. And we
will,� he promised darkly. �I�ll cut off any hand that�s touched her, gouge out
any eye that�s leered at her, and cut out every tongue that�s dared to speak
ill of her.� It was a blood-soaked promise and he would see it realised.
"All while staying safe." Salida narrowed her eyes
at him. "Don't make her go through loosing you twice."
�Oh I�ll be safe,� he hissed. �I�ll plan their deaths out to
the smallest of details. I�ll make them beg for death long before I kill them.
I�ll take them one by one over as long a period of it time it takes to get them
all if I have to, but they will pay. I can be patient if the reward is enticing
enough.�
Salida didn't comment on how she thought Aida would
prefer him to simply walk away from the mess and be with her. That was Aida's
fight. Right now she was focused on Sands, because as much as she hated to
admit it, she'd missed him. A little.
"Jeffrey!" she said
suddenly. "Where's Jeffrey? He'll want to be in on all this."
Sands blinked and loosened the death grip of control he had
imitated when he had come back into consciousness. He had been too afraid of
losing it again to do anything else. �He�s still here,� Sands murmured,
allowing Jeffrey to speak again.
�Well dress me up in pink spandex and call me pretty boy,�
Jeffrey grunted, taking in Sands� presence with an amused snort.
Sands rolled his eyes. �The rumours of my death have been
greatly exaggerated,� he muttered.
�I tried to warn you vixen but he wouldn�t let me. He swept
in and kicked the rest of us�I guess that�s just me now�out.�
"It's okay. I was surprised, of course." She shook
her head. "We have to do something about Aida."
�She�s in prison,� Jeffrey said slowly, his amusement fading
into deadly seriousness in less than an instant. �I assume staging a riot and
just moving in to take her out is out of the question?�
�Too risky,� Sands murmured,
having briefly entertained the idea himself.
�Well I assume you have some kind of plan. You�re not just
going to let kitty fucking rot in there so come on, speak up. I�m all ears.�
"We think that getting Sands into the transport vehicle
the day of her sentencing is the smartest move. As in there's the least risk to
Aida."
Jeffrey nodded. �Not as fun as staging a frontal assault
with a flame-thrower or something, but yeah, safer,� he murmured. �That means
we�ve got a week to fly back to the states�� he froze and frowned at his wife.
�You can�t fly, vixen. You can�t leave. You�re about to fucking burst for god�s
sake.� He was clearly torn between the somewhat brotherly urge to rescue Aida
and the screaming desperate husbandly urge to stay by her side and tell Sands
and Aida to go fuck themselves.
"What do you mean 'I can't fly?'� Salida's eyes
narrowed dangerously. "If you're referring to the fact that I still don't
have wings, I'd have to agree. But I don't see how I would have a problem
stepping onboard an airplane."
Jeffrey quickly attempted to backpedal, kicking himself for
treading on her touchy emotions. �You can�t come with us. It�s not safe,� he
said evenly. He couldn�t leave her here alone but he wasn�t going to let her
head into the fray either.
"Then let me come part of the way. The weather is vile here
in the winter anyway." She glared at the sleet that was now hitting the
windows. "I say it's time for a relocation."
�You want to fly south for the
winter,� he asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Hell yes. Besides, then
you'll all have a shorter flight once you get Aida out of prison."
It did make a kind of sense. Before Jeffrey could comment as
much, Sands cut in decisively. �You�re going to the Caribbean. I don�t care
where, but that�s where you�re going. It�s warm and it�s close enough to where
Aida�s being held without being in the US so that�s where we�ll stay.
Understand?�
Salida nodded - it was someplace warm and that's all that
mattered to her. "I bet she'll appreciate the sun."
Sands frowned, not answering that. He had never actually
been imprisoned-he had come close more than a few times but had never actually
been caught-so he couldn�t rightly say what she�d appreciate now. She only
hoped she�d appreciate him.
�Of course she will. You two can lay out becoming one with
it if you wish while Sands and I will keep to the friendlier shadows,� Jeffrey
said with a shrug.
"As if Aida is going to let
Sands out of her sight," Salida scoffed.
Sands sent her a thinly veiled
look at that, hoping that she was right.
�I don�t think he believes you, but you�re probably right,�
Jeffrey murmured, not looking forward to the imposed absence he would be forced
to take but not able to fault them for it either. And as it was he had just had
two whole months of blissful solitude with his wife. He was feeling generous.
"Just keep in mind that these babies are going to pop
out in a month - give or take - and I expect the responsible party to be
there." Salida was glaring again.
Jeffrey just sent her a wide grin that was more than a bit
on the smug side knowing he�d be paying for it later.
Sands just nodded.
"Alright. In that case, I suppose someone should
arrange for tickets and I'll pack some bags. And get the cats in their
crates."
�Aida didn�t take them?� Sands
asked softly, his first words in awhile.
�As if I was going to let her take my cat,� Jeffrey huffed,
his eyes searching out Obsidian but not finding him. The now monstrously large
black beast was probably terrorizing some poor creature somewhere. Just the
thought of that brought a smile to his face. �She probably didn�t want to
separate them,� he added when he felt that Sands was waiting for a further
explanation.
"Or she forgot."
Salida shrugged. "She was only about half-alive when she left."
�She was?� Sands whispered in a broken voice, telling
himself to remember that the time that had passed had been two months for
everyone else but him. Not to mention the fact that she thought he was dead.
Salida considered how her words had sounded then hastened to
reassure him. "No, she was fine. It wasn't as if she had been starving
herself or something. She was just...sad. Very, very sad."
Sands nodded but found he didn�t take much reassurance in
her words. He could only imagine what she must be going through. If that were
him; if he was forced to lose her and yet see her face every day breathing,
laughing, talking, he didn�t know if he could handle it. �She�s stronger than I
am,� he murmured under his breath. �She always has been.�
"I don't know why you and
Jeffrey always insist on that," Salida muttered.
�On what?� Jeffrey asked
curiously after hearing his name mentioned.
"On believing that we're so much stronger than you guys.
Because you're wrong. Strong in different ways...that I'd accept. But stronger?
Emotionally? I don't think so."
Jeffrey just shrugged, not
intending to argue the point one way or another.
Sands� gaze grew wistful and
saddened. He missed Aida. He missed her strength.
Salida rolled her eyes at Jeffrey's refusal to fight with
her, then dug out the phone book and plopped it into their lap. "Get to
work."
Sands nodded and flipped straight through to the travel
listings to arrange a flight back to the US for the three of them. �Do you want
to fly out of New Orleans to whatever piece of the Caribbean you decide on or
the other way around?� It didn�t really matter one way or the other to him as
long as he got Aida back.
"Caribbean first. We find a place to stay - a
hotel," she assured the men, knowing that anything else would take too
long. "And then you guys can take a flight back to the good 'ol US."
Sands nodded. �Fine. Where?� he asked in a clipped voice,
wanting to get this worked out as soon as possible.
"Choose an island. I don't really care."
�Fine,� Sands muttered, quickly locating the number of the
travel agency they had flew in with-why mess with what works?-and dialing their
number. After a few minutes of haggling, he had arranged for two tickets to St.
Croix for tomorrow afternoon at 4. It wasn�t nearly soon enough but the agent
assured him that that was the best she could do and after sufficient threats
over the phone Sands believed her. �Tomorrow. 4pm. St. Croix,� he murmured in
case Salida hadn�t been eavesdropping.
"Alright. Let's spend the
rest of today planning then."
Sands nodded. That would be about all he could do. He needed
to concentrate on getting Aida back or else he felt like he�d just fall apart.
He probably wouldn�t, especially since he knew Aida needed him, but that was
what it felt like. But they would get Aida back. If and when he still felt like
he needed to fall apart, it could be then.
***
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More Than Darkness