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Fallen	By : serendip Category: Star Wars (All) > General Views: 3106 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Star Wars is the property of George Lucas. This story is for entertainment purposes only. No infringement of rights is intended. I do not make any profit from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Fallen
- 2-Two
- 3-Three
- 4-Four
- 5-Five
- 6-Six
- 7-Seven
- 8-Eight
- 9-Nine
- 10-Ten
- 11-Eleven
- 12-Twelve
- 13-Thirteen
- 14-the end...
- 5
- 6
- 7
Tiredness pulled at the edges of her senses, making them dull, strained. Gripping the contact stunner in herpocket, Aala picked up her pace as she passed a group of rowdy teenagers and forced herself to focus. The problem with this level, a few levels further down than she usually liked to travel, was that it was right in the middle of two worlds. High enough to assuredly purport how safe and popular it was, and in the daylight she was sure it was, mostly, but low enough to attract some of the more outgoing residents that usually stayed below. The ones looking for trouble. Especially when it was dark, like now.

Neon purple and blue lights lit up the nearly deserted streets and reflected off the rain slicked duracrete. It was pouring. Water collected on the buildings and skyscrapers above, then fell in big cold drops to the levels below, making it even more miserable than the steady shower above.

Pulling her jacket tighter around her body, she tried to keep out the pervasive chill, all the while trying not to think about her lovely, cozy apartment. The apartment she hardly ever saw anymore as the war raged on. She’d only returned home from Alderaan last night and was due to leave for the outer rim the day after tomorrow to follow an intelligence lead on Praesitlyn.

Reaching the establishment that was her unfortunate destination for the night, Aala caught a glimpse of her reflection as she opened the glass door of the dingy diner. She had dark circles under her eyes and her skin looked washed out and ashy. Her messy hair was wet now, too, and clung to the sides of her face. Why, in the name of all that was sacred, would Obi-Wan ask her to come out on a night it was scheduled to rain.

She’d had plans. She was going to take a bath, curl up with a good holobook and then promptly fall asleep.

‘And why is he here of all places?’ She thought to herself, starting to get annoyed.

‘And where is he?’ Standing just inside the doorway, she felt like stamping her foot in frustration when, finally, she spotted him at a booth in the back corner.

Her heart skipped a beat. And she had thought she looked bad.

Slowly, taking off her jacket, she made her way toward him. In her mind, she quickly flipped through everything she’d heard in the past 48 hours. As far as she knew, his last mission had ended successfully. She’d actually seen Anakin just that morning and she was sure, almost entirely sure, her sister was safely tucked away in her expensive penthouse at 500 Republica. But things could change.

“What can I getcha?” A service droid rolled by as she sat down in the booth opposite him.

“Coffee’s fine.” She answered without taking her eyes off of Obi-Wan. “Hi.”

“Hello.” He nodded politely, but there was no warmth in his expression, no happiness with her arrival. His face was pale, and he looked like he literally hadn’t slept in days.

Perplexed, she regarded him closely, thinking she had never seen him look quite like this before. “It’s really coming down out there,” she said, pulling her hair back from her face.

“Hmm.” Uncharacteristically subdued, he looked out the window, up toward the dark sky, but she could tell he wasn’t really taking note of the weather. Utterly lost in his own thoughts, he wasn’t projecting anything and he wouldn’t meet her inquisitive gaze. There was nothing; no emotion to indicate to her what he was thinking.

Well, this was just irritating. “What’s up, Kenobi?”

Startled, he blinked and looked at her. It was like he was trying to meditate; did he forget she was even there? “Oh. I just wanted to see you.”

Right.

His attempt at a smile was pathetic. She had a perfectly nice, warm, dry apartment. With a bed. There was no logical reason to be out here on a night like this. She was at a complete loss. Never before had she seen him act this distracted.

Not knowing what else to do, she sat in silence with him until her coffee came. “Sorry,” she stopped the waitress, “can I get some milk?”

He watched her as she fixed her coffee. The rain pattered against the window, softly drumming a lulling beat. She wondered if he was ever going to say anything at all.

As she brought the steaming mug to her lips, he finally broke his silence. “Why did you choose this life, Aala?” he asked her softly.

“What? Politics?” she asked confused.

“No...” he shook his head. “This. Us.”

She laughed it off. “I’d hardly call you a ‘way of life’, Obi-Wan. How often do we even see each other?”

The expression on his face remained the same, unamused and just as serious as before. He actually wanted a real answer.

Shrugging, she tried to keep her tone casual. “You make it easy for a girl like me,” she answered flippantly, “–no commitment, no expectations, no pressure.”

He wasn’t buying. And she had a bad feeling she knew exactly where this conversation was headed. But how the hell could he know? She’d never uttered a word, never even hinted at it. Damn Jedi.

He looked at her intently, and she felt like he was reading her as easily as he would a progress report on the battlefront. “Something happened.” He was in full Jedi mode now. She knew he used that when he was upset, stolidly keeping his feelings at bay.

“Yeah.” Exasperated, she answered as if it should be obvious. “I was in a shuttle crash that very nearly ripped me in two.”

“No, no. Not that.”

Aala groaned, her shoulders slumping and she frowned at him. “I don’t ask you about your other lovers,” she huffed.

“I don’t have any other lovers.”

“Ex-lovers, then.”

A flash of pain crossed his worn features.

“Nevermind,” she said quickly, grimacing. Jedi Obi-Wan she knew. She could deal with him. This other Obi-Wan, the moody one, he made her nervous. She took a drink of her coffee and swallowed; his face was impassive again. He was practically staring her down and she changed her mind. This was General Kenobi, but there would be no negotiations here. He wanted information and he was going to get it.

Aala gave a resigned sigh. “I’ve never told anyone this.” She warned him, hoping he would back down. “It’s not even that important, I just – ” She broke off and he nodded, indicating she should continue. Closing her eyes, she drew a deep breath and steeled herself against having to relive something she’d much rather just leave in the past. “After I graduated, I met someone. He was charming and smart and I thought I was in love.

“It went really fast, and after a few months he asked me to marry him. He was... very... traditional. He wanted to ask my father’s permission and everything – thank the Force I talked him out of that.

“Anyway, we started planning a wedding, and we were engaged and deliriously happy,” she said sarcastically, “and one day we were out, at dinner or something, and he started talking about how he wanted a boy and a girl with my good looks and his brains and...” she almost smiled sadly at the memory, but she stopped herself and shrugged, “I realized – I hadn’t told him. It was stupid of me, I know. It was my own fault, but I didn’t know what to say. He was so – I don’t know – eager...

“So, I just came out and said it. I explained what happened. And he left.”

“He left.” Obi-Wan said it resignedly, as if he had known the punch line all along, had been dreading it and he scrubbed his hand across his face.

“He wasn’t angry or upset, he just said he wanted a family and he couldn’t marry me and then he just got up and left.”

“I’m sorry. That’s terrible.” He said it sincerely, and she looked up at him. It meant a lot to her that Obi-Wan offered comfort, not rejection, that he always had, but she didn’t know how to put that into words. And there it was once more on his face. Deep pain. Loss.

Those feelings flooded into her. That moment, from long ago of the man she thought she loved walking away from her replayed in her head so clearly, it was as if it was happening again. She studied a nick on the table, unable to meet Obi-Wan’s eyes. “He made me feel worthless. Like I had no value as a person, as a woman...,” her voice faded away until she was almost whispering; it was so hard for her to say this out loud. “I thought he loved me and he just walked away, like I was nothing to him.”

She took a deep cleansing breath and shook her head, trying to clear away the bad memories. “And I pretty much gave up on men. And love.”

“You don’t think you’ll ever get the chance to be happy.” It was a brutally honest statement and it fractured the last of her composure.

“Don’t put words in my mouth.” She snapped at him. “I’m happy.”

“You don’t look happy.”

“Because you’re acting like a crazy person!” She was rapidly losing her patience with this situation and his lack of candidness. “Obi-Wan. What happened?”

He paused, staring at his hands. “A friend, a close friend, passed on.”

“Who?” Apprehension crept into her voice.

“You don’t know her.” He answered quietly.

“Obi-Wan...” she let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding, “oh, I’m so sorry.” She wanted to reach out to him, in some way, but he offered her nothing. She thought about what little he had said, what he had asked her, put the pieces together one by one in her head.... “I’m sorry.” she repeated.

His grief seemed to well up in him, threatened to overflow. She could feel it herself, as if it were her own and she knew it well. It had been a year since Obi-Wan had been presumed dead, but she would never forget what she had gone through those first couple of days. He clutched his coffee cup tightly in his hands, so hard she worried he was going to break it.

Her heart sank and the words were spilling from her mouth before she could stop herself. “You loved her.”

“I loved her.” He said it so softly, she almost didn’t hear and she didn’t think he was talking to her anymore.

“Why did you call me?” She was speaking again, without thinking. The question had fallen from her lips before she could consider whether it might be better to just keep it to herself.

He looked at her, his eyes wide and she realized the way that must have sounded.

“I don’t – I don’t mean that. I just... Obi-Wan, I don’t know anything about love,” she said sadly, “... the one time I tried, I utterly and completely failed.”

What was she supposed to say? What was she supposed to be feeling right now? Jealousy? Compassion? Pain? The only thing she knew she felt was completely overwhelmed. What did he want from her? Whatever it was, she was pretty sure she couldn’t provide it.

The pang of heartbreak, his heartbreak and hers from so long ago, swirled together inside her. It was sharp and raw, and it made it hard to breathe. She felt a tear slip over her cheek and hastily, she brushed it away. Surely, it would be misunderstood.

“I have to go.” Gathering up her jacket, she carelessly dropped a few credits on the table and stood. He didn’t look at her. “I – I’m sorry.”

She turned to leave, feeling like the walls were about to collapse on top of her. But as she started to walk away, she forced herself to stop and turn back to him. Blinking back her tears, she covered his hand with her own. “Obi-Wan. If you need me, you can call. Anytime.” Hollow words, she knew, from a woman who was about to walk out, but she just didn’t know how to deal with this, not right now.

He was staring outside again, into the darkness, watching drops of rain slide down the glass window pane. She thought she saw him nod. Biting her lip, and hating herself, she turned away from him again. Tears fell unbidden down her cheeks; if she could only get outside, they would mix with the rain and wash away. Hurriedly, she made her way to the door and left.

He didn’t call.
- 5
- 6
- 7
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Fallen