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Sleeping beauty	By : darkangel985 Category: 1 through F > Constantine Views: 4779 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Constantine, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 5
- 6
- 7
Thanks to sadsally and
especially to zeegermans for reviewing. I know that I'm torturing and
possibly annoying you with the lack of updates, but somehow I just
can't write quickly at the moment. Dammit. Anyway, here's the next
chapter.

Chapter 6 – Crossing the threshold

“What?”

John knew that he
probably had a confused expression spread over his face that
absolutely didn't match his hard-ass
exorcist image, but the shock of seeing Chas who was usually a
reliable source for chaos of all sorts so sophisticated ran pretty
deep.

“Maybe I'll just explain it to
you then. If you'd be so kind as to follow me.”

And where the hell had
Chas learned all that fucking fancy language? Definitely not from
himself and John doubted that the kid's parents had had the money to
pay for a better than average education. Had to have been from one of
the books then, but why he was using it now was still eluding the
exorcist.

Reaching a small
sitting area Chas plopped himself down on a couch, tugging his legs
under his body and suddenly looking a lot more like the apprentice
John knew and loved. Immensely calmed by
that fact John took a seat too, staring in puzzlement as Chas offered
him a cup of tea.

“It's a lot healthier than
whiskey.” Now that he had mentioned it John came to the
conclusion that he could very well do with a drink and a smoke, but
unfortunately it seemed like he could have neither at the moment. So
instead he resigned himself to the cup of tea, staring at it as if it
was a foreign object that he had never seen before. Taking a cautious
sip John quickly set it down again, wishing that the awful taste
would just leave his mouth. He knew why he had always stuck with
whiskey.

“So where the hell am I now?
And why are these tons of books piled up in Chas' mind?”

His apprentice, who had
also sipped from his tea, gingerly set his own cup down before
beginning to speak. “This room is my memory. Everything the
waking world version of me experiences and knows is gathered here.
Every snippet of information, every sound and taste he ever
experienced, every word he spoke and saw.”

It sounded fantastic,
especially considering the amount of information stored all around
him. Having learned the strange surprises Chas' mind seemed to hold
he shouldn't really be surprised, but John just couldn't believe that
his apprentice had that vast a knowledge. “Fucking bullshit.
Nobody could know everything that is stored in these books.”

“Tsk...tsk..tsk.” Chas
was waving his forefinger at him as if he was scolding a petulant
child. “You don't really seem to understand. Not everything
that is stored here is knowledge that is conscious.
But none-the-less, if you were less fixated on doing everything
yourself and had given Chas a real chance, you might have gotten to
experience how much knowledge on demons this mind holds.”

Mmh. John wasn't about
to admit that he had never let the kid come to an exorcism because he
had simply wanted to keep him save, so he quickly changed the subject
of their conversation. He had always been good in that when it came
to his discussions with Chas, since the kid was easily distracted.
“If you're so clever, then tell me where the hell I'll find the
real version of Chas.”

“Ah, a diversion tactic. I'm
sorry to disappoint you, but they never really worked in the waking
world either. But just like each time before I will let it slip and
give you the advice you desire.” John once again stared open
mouthed at Chas, taken aback by the dry wit that was suddenly matched
against his bitter sarcasm.

Nobody had ever so much
as tried to call him on his tendency to avoid topics he didn't want
to discuss and now this snotty, little librarian version of Chas had
done the very thing and quite smugly at that. Dammit. When had his
wit decreased so much that he couldn't even find a good comeback to
that? Except for muttering curses of
course.

“This room is the threshold
between the simpler, earlier emotions and the emotions that develop
later in one's life. To find the version of me you are looking for
you have to pass through all of them, delving into the deepest
recesses of my mind. But I'll warn you. Don't expect the Chas' you
meet there to be like the person you know. Just like me they are mere
facets of him, pieces of a whole. Whatever you might see, might
change your opinion on...”

“Yeah, yeah, cut it out.”
This version of his apprentice was creeping him out more than the
adoring or the angry personalities had been, mostly because the
librarian seemed more mature than he could ever imagine Chas, or
himself for that matter, to be. “Where do I have to go?”

Getting up from his
seat Chas stepped aside, revealing a door that John was absolutely
certain had not been there a second ago.
But things appearing out of thin air obviously
wasn't such an uncommon occurrence in the
youth's mind so John simply took it as it was and stepped through the
doorway that had been indicated to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The room was cold and damp, smelling of chlorine and illuminated
by far too bright overhead lights. But the lights flickered almost
constantly, creating a confusing play of light and shadows on the
tiled floor and walls. White tiles all around him, occasionally
broken by a drain or a shower
head.

Walking through the strange bathroom John tried to avoid the small
puddles of water that had gathered wherever the tiles weren't
completely flat. He couldn't for the life
of himself imagine what kind of personality the Chas that lived here
might have, but John was certain that he would get to know him soon
enough.

Peering around one of the corners he found that the room was
constructed into small boxes which made it difficult to guess it's
true size. The wall around the next corner made John pause for a
minute because it consisted solely of smashed mirrors, his image
multiplied and distorted by the shards.

His attention was drawn to one corner of the mirrors, to the place
where a single shard seemed to be missing. Guessing that it must have
dropped to the floor John looked down, his gaze instantly focused on
the small drops of blood that had splattered onto the white tiles.

Following the trail of blood drops with his eyes John found that
they lead away from the mirrors and around another corner. John
cautiously walked closer to the corner,
peering around it and almost gasping in shock.

Chas, or rather another version of him, was sitting in a corner of
the tiled cubicle, the shard gleaming in the stark light as he slowly
drew it over his skin. Blood welled up from the cut, running over
Chas' paler than normal skin and dropping to the floor in tiny
crimson dots.

John could feel his arms itching with remembered delicious pain,
the urge to reach out and trace the long healed cuts very strong. But
he resisted, instead stepping forward to confront Chas. His
apprentice didn't even notice him at first, still completely focused
on the shard and the cuts in his skin.

A small puddle of blood had already formed on the floor around
him, dripping down from cuts in both of his forearms. John simply
avoided the pools of sticky red liquid, crouching down and placing a
hand on Chas' shoulder. Startled the youth looked up, his eyes red
from crying.

“I know I'm not good enough to come with you, John. But I
know how to handle the pain...” Chas once again looked down at
his arm, making a fresh cut. “I really know how to handle the
pain.”

What the hell was this Chas talking about? Not good enough? Well,
if there was one person who wasn't good enough, then it was
definitely himself who wasn't good enough for Chas and not the other
way round, that John was certain of. He had just been too weak to
resist the temptation of having Chas close and hadn't been able to
sent him to somebody who would have shown him more compassion during
his apprenticeship.

“Bullshit, Chas. You did good when you helped me hold Mammon
back.” And he'd even told the kid so. Ok, he had just admitted
that Chas hadn't done badly, but at that moment in time he had been
sure that his apprentice knew him well enough to understand.
Obviously not. “And give me the damn shard.”

“No, you're lying. If I had been good I wouldn't have been
smashed around. I'm a shitty exorcist. Go away John.” Instead
of listening to Chas the exorcist tried to reach out for him, but his
apprentice lashed at him with the shard, pain blossoming on John's
forearm as blood slowly stained his white shirt.

And while John was still cursing and pressing his hand on the
wound Chas had already vanished, leaving him alone on the cold tile
floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least for a few minutes, until the sound of footsteps echoed
through the otherwise silent room. John wondered if the self-hating
version of Chas would reappear or if he would have to face another
personality facet he never knew his
apprentice possessed.

The footsteps finally rounded the last
corner, revealing a completely normal looking Chas. No strange
clothing, no obvious mood, no injuries, just a familiar frown
spreading over his face as he came closer and spotted the blood that
still welled from between John's fingers.

“John, you're bleeding.” Kneeling down next to him
Chas tried to pry his fingers away in order to examine the cut, but
John stubbornly held them over the wound. It was only a small cut
that should theoretically stop bleeding
soon. At least it would in the real world.

“I'm fine. I don't need help.” The expression on Chas'
face clearly stated how often he had heard this before and how little
of it he believed. John could be buried under three demons, chocking
and bleeding to death, unable to reach his holy water and he still
wouldn't ask for help. So instead of getting into a discussion with
the stubborn exorcist Chas' simply grabbed his uninjured arm and
pulled him up from the ground.

As soon as they had gotten up John already found himself ushered
into a chair in what suspiciously looked like his own kitchen. Chas
had vanished, but that wasn't what had caught John's attention for
the moment. On the table right in front of him was not only a bottle
of whiskey, but also a pack of smokes. As if inspired by the sight
his body suddenly and firmly demanded nicotine, preferably lots of
it.

Pouring himself a glass of whiskey John sighed in contentment
as he lit a cigarette, smoke invading his lungs for the first time in
far too long. He knew that he had promised to stop, but this was just
Chas' mind, so it didn't count, did it? Slowly exhaling the exorcist
had almost lifted the glass to his lips, when it was suddenly pried
from his fingers.

TBC...
- 5
- 6
- 7
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Sleeping beauty