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The Ruined Abbe	By : pip Category: M through R > Quills Views: 2537 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Quills, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter Four
Another sigh, another rattle of the old chains, but they were certainly losing a little of their novelty now. Until, that is, the door opened. The Marquis shifted himself and raised his chin in defiance, ready for whatever the doctor had decided to have done to him next. Only… it wasn't the doctor. Neither was it Madeleine, which was a shame, but opening one eye to peep made Sade think it might be even better than that.
"I suppose I have you to thank for this?" he queried, pulling the chains deliberately, "though I can't say I blame you."
Coulmier was back, and a little the worse for wear. But then there was no wear. That was his problem.
The dark circles under his eyes were heavy and smudged, but those notable eyes also held a slightly fevered gleam as he locked the door behind him and faced de Sade. He glared, and Sade smirked.
"Well, now. Are they to keep you safe from me, or to keep me safe from you?"
The glare only turned into a glower. "Shut. Up."
"That bad?" Sade queried, raising an eyebrow. "Really?" He reflected upon the previous visit, and smiled with satisfaction. "But then even I have to admit, it was particularly well done." He looked around the cell, but since he had seen the walls at least a million times before, he looked at Coulmier again to properly enjoy the effect of his lesson.
"I can't eat," Coulmier stated, not even looking at him. "I don't sleep."
"You are in love!" Sade exclaimed, teasing, but Coulmier wasn't finished.
"I barely manage to approach God with my prayers." He stopped and paused, as if hearing Sade for the first time. "Well done?" he echoed. "Is that all you have to say?"
As if the words had given him pause, Sade drew in a deep breath, and then replied in a serious tone. "My dear Abbé, I assure you that if I had any sympathy at all, it would be yours!" He held out his hands, as far as the chains would allow, in the gesture of giving a gift.
Now, any other man would have lashed out, and there wasn't a part of the Marquis that didn't believe he deserved it. But this wasn't any other man, it was the Abbé de Coulmier, and Sade watched with much amusement as he brought his baser instincts under control and squashed down his fury. "Didn't I afford you all the things I could when it was still within my power?" he appealed. "Didn't that count for anything when you determined to ruin me this way?"
"Oh, well even from your twisted mind, that is amusing," Sade retorted, then looked up and away from Coulmier. "I seem to remember having the distinct impression that at the first test of our camaraderie and friendship, I was thrown to the dogs." He sensed Coulmier's guilt and pursued it. "Or rather, the dog, as it were." He chanced to look back at Coulmier and the Abbé seemed so utterly miserable it almost wasn't fun anymore.
"I am but a bone to be chewed and toyed with!" Sade declared, and rattled the chains again. "Go ahead, I can't stop you!"
Instead of laughing, Coulmier shook his head. "Must you reduce everything meaningful to the level of lewd jokes?"
"Must you elevate everything beyond the reach of humanity?" the Marquis countered.
"It is my calling," Coulmier said, and he was almost pleading, but mercy now would be unpardonable. After a few seconds of silence, Sade remarked:
"I hear nothing."
"That is because you do not listen," Coulmier said bitterly.
"Yes, I do," Sade replied simply, and then recited: "You can't eat. You don't sleep. You barely pray."
As he spoke, he watched Coulmier, and knew why he was back, even if Coulmier didn't. "Your dreams terrify you," he added carefully, certain he was right, and he was.
"What?" Confusion, as if he wasn't sure if he had admitted to it or not. The Marquis smiled.
"I am an excellent listener."
Coulmier only sighed. "I didn't come here for discussion or argument, and certainly not to confide in you. Simply to say that I regret any part I played in this, and to apologise for the many ways in which I've failed you."
"You are failing me now," he said with a note of indifference.
"I want no part in your games. I never did."
"That's not what I mean," Sade replied. "If your will is truly able to stand with mine, there can be no reason for these things." He rattled the chains once more. "Unlock them." Coulmier hesitated, debating silently within himself. Sade sneered. "Or is your weakness such that you dare not face me man to man?"
They were at an impasse, and the Marquis was stubbornly determined to give no ground whatsoever, until eventually, Coulmier produced a key and freed him from the restraints. When it was done, Sade stood while Coulmier walked to the small barred window as if to look out of it. The Marquis rubbed his chafed wrists while he determined his next play.
"I am leaving service," Coulmier said quietly, sadly, "and most likely Charenton."
Sade gasped, for he had not expected this. At least, not so soon. "When?" he demanded to know, wondering how much time he had to complete his little ambition for Coulmier.
"I have not decided. I have yet to speak to my superior."
"Then don't, not yet," Sade advised, walking over to him. For once he was at a loss what to do. How to keep Coulmier here? From behind Coulmier, Sade reached out and almost rested his hands on the man's shoulders.
"I am no longer fit to…" Coulmier said quietly, his voice trailing off, unaware of Sade's sudden uncertainty. "I… have lost something." He shrugged.
"Your dreams?" the Marquis enquired, almost solicitous, and Coulmier turned around to face him, with a look that was an odd kind of wry defeat.
"They feature only you," he said, desolate. "And the more I attempt to exorcise you from them, the worse they become."
"Do you dislike me so much, mon ami?"
Coulmier smiled. "You have made me an offence in the sight of the one I love above all else. There is no greater harm you could have caused me. I have every reason to hate you, Marquis, but I don't." He sighed shakily. "I don't."
"I seek to free you from that suffocating prison you inhabit," Sade said, speaking truly and seriously, "and I do not mean Charenton."
"Even if it were freedom – if I accepted that – what freedom is there when the price is peace, serenity and dignity?" Coulmier challenged. Now that Sade saw him up close, he could see that the dark circles were even worse that he'd first thought.
"I would pay it," he said simply, and looked around him at the empty cell, then rolled his eyes.
"We are not the same, Marquis."
"Yes. We are." Sade laughed quietly. "We are all the same. Even your beloved God's teachings can't deny that." At last, he reached out and held Coulmier's face in his hands, and the man closed his eyes, too trusting. Sade brushed his thumbs over those dark circles as if he would banish them, and then kissed him, because he could, and because Coulmier didn't do one thing to stop him. If I do one thing today, he thought, I'll make sure you sleep tonight.
"I said I was an offence," Coulmier said, opening his eyes. "Would you make me such in deed as well as thought?" He asked the question, but it was as though he submitted to it anyway. Sade gave him the answer he needed, the obvious one.
"What is deed, when thought is there already?" he queried, and Coulmier swallowed, then nodded in acquiescence.
"This, then, is the choice," he said quietly, and it was clear he meant more than the act itself. He meant what he had said about leaving, and seeing that made Sade more determined to do what he could, while he could.
"You made it when you came here, to me. I did warn you."
"Will it hurt?" Coulmier asked, as if Sade hadn't spoken.
"Undoubtedly." There really wasn't any getting away from that, but Coulmier would soon learn to appreciate the keenness of it. They had already ascertained that he was not averse to pain.
"And… the other thing?" No pain without pleasure. So Coulmier had learnt that first lesson! He had a surprise coming, the Marquis was sure. So as not to spoil it, he said:
"Well. I suggest we see how far we can get with hurt." Then, he added wickedly: "After all, it is my turn."
"Your turn…" Coulmier repeated dully, and while it wasn't really a question, Sade answered it anyway, remembering how long it had taken to satiate himself with his own hand after seeing Coulmier before.
"Last time, you left me unspent," he noted. "You owe me. You will satisfy me now, Abbé," he said. "We shall see what you have left after that."
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The Ruined Abbe