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The Siren Song of Pirate Fire	By : KinkyCheshireKat Category: Pirates of the Caribbean (All) > General Views: 2999 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Pirates of the Caribbean movie series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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The Siren Song of Pirate Fire
By �Kitty� Katrionna Brannagh

A/N: Ah, another day, another set of dumbfounded readers.
Excellent! Pssh, I wish... Then
again, I�ve already got 3 reviews, which is more than I thought I would get (somewhere
in the vicinity of 0 or 1...). Ok, �nuff-uh-at!! ��o_O* ��T�is
new chapter!! Review of last time: Jack and Lela are both trying to be
crafty and find out if the other likes them. ��-_-; ��Stupid
kids, just ASK!! Fortunately Jack can�t take it anymore and basically asks Lela
straight out. Then (yay!) they kiss. But then... Bum bum bum!!
Jack wakes up and I say something about all those years ago...

THE APRIL FOOL: What�s up with that?! <rim shot>

You don�t know, do you??!! So you must read to find out, mwa HA!
........................ Now quick everyone. To the Cat Cave!
(I�m really tired. Can you tell??)

Oh yeah. <throws cookies with �thanks!� in red icing at those who
read and/or reviewed> Thank ye kindly, m�dears. ^_^

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With an audible growl, Jack tossed the rum
bottle onto the wooden floor. Clank, and it rolled along the ground,
spinning toward the wall of the cabin as the ship groaned faintly and swayed on
the sea. Jack panted heavily as he swiped a hand across his forehead, the beads
of sweat gathering to the back of his hand. He looked around, and quickly
regretted the action as his head swam with ache and disorientation. What had
gotten him to start drinking so much? �And where the hell are we?� he muttered.

Throwing back the warm covers that covered his
bed Jack shivered as he felt the cool night air rush over his exposed skin, and
he shakily walked over to the window, zigzagging across the floor, too intoxicated
to saunter in his usual slightly-tipsy but graceful swagger. In the back of his
mind, Jack thought he heard someone call his name but shrugged it off as the
rum making him hallucinate. He threw open the shutter and stuck his head out.
Salty air met his nose and the spray of seawater from below cleared his head a
little. Raising his eyes, Jack glanced to his right and saw lights and shabby
houses. He could smell the bitter stench of alcohol and smoke, and the combined
though completely distinctive odours of sex and sweat and filth.

�Tortuga,� he
said to himself, rolling his eyes and leaning back inside his cabin. Shaking
his head he turned around to go back to bed. But instead he got a little surprise
(�little� as in �he about had a heart attack�). Instead of finding an inviting
down feather cot with warm sheets to collapse back into on a cold night, Jack
instead found...

A Tortuga
whore.

(Quick A/N: ./` Guess who�s baaa-ack? ./` A lot of what
she says is phonetically written; it�s not that I forgot to do Spell Check...)

�Oh!� The woman�s jaw swung open, down and to
the side a bit, as she yawned histrionically. �Mm, �ello Jackie-love!�

Jack shakily leaned back as his hands waved
about in front of his face and his eyes went wide. Then, regaining some (note
the word �some�) composure, Jack stood as straight as he could--being drunk and
all--and held his hands out wide in a seemingly warm gesture.

�Scarlet!� he exclaimed and forced a small
laugh. �Long time no see! I�s been, what? A year or two?�

Scarlet scrunched her forehead as one extremely
thin eyebrow rose up. �Jackie, darlin�, what-ya mean �two �er fthree years�? I
just found ya last night!� Now it was Jack�s turn to furrow his brow and have a
delicately curved eyebrow (A/N: Sorry, couldn�t resist that! ^_^) shoot up. He
drew his lips together, making defined cheekbones all the more noticeable, as
he turned his head slightly sideways and looked suspiciously at Scarlet.

�Last...last night?� he asked, sceptically.
Scarlet let out an obviously strained giggle. She got up off the bed, taking
the wrinkled black cotton sheets with her.

�Jackie, you don�member?� Scarlet strolled over
to Jack (who was backing up against the window), excessively swaying her hips.
�You walked into the tavern,� she said slowly, �and I saw you.�

Jack nervously stumbled back against the wooden
walls as Scarlet continued her assault.

Grinning seductively, she continued recounting
the night�s events. �Ev�eyone was talkin� and flockin� �round ya, so it wasn�t
until you �ad �ad fthree bott-als-o-roum that I meself got to ya.�

Raising herself on tip-toe, Scarlet pressed
herself against Jack and trailed her forefinger across his lower lip, all the
while smiling wickedly, her over-painted red lips slightly parted, exposing
pale yellow teeth.

�By then, ye wous so tipsy I too�it �pon myself
to tike ya back to da ship. And by the time we got �ere...� Scarlet
squashed Jack even more into the wall with her enormous bosom, �Well,� she
giggled, �le�s just sie tha� I made ya a offer ye could�n refuse.�

Before Jack could react, the whore had wrapped
her arms around his neck.

Luckily, just as she was about to mash her lips
into his, Jack ducked under her arm and raced forward for the door, causing
Scarlet to open her eyes wide in surprise and topple through the open window,
the jet sheets streaming out behind her as she screamed and fell into the water
with a splash.

Jack stopped with a halt as heard something
crash into the sea outside his window. His eyes grew large as they slowly
looked to as far left as they could before Jack turned his head. He put his
other foot down and stood straight. Turning around he strode over to the window
and stuck his head out. Down below, a very soggy Scarlet splashed about trying
to keep the sheets around her and not drown. She gurgled and sputtered and
yelped and sobbed as her black eyeliner trailed down her cheeks in runny, messy
torrents. Jack looked sympathetic for a moment.

Then he tilted his head slightly to the right, with
his lips drawn down again and his eyes looking away, as if to say, �Oh well.�
Scarlet yelled Jack�s name and tried to swim to the side of the Black Pearl.
The pirate stuck his head out once more. �Yes?�

�Cou-� cough, cough, �could I at least
�ave my-� splash, splash, �ah! My clothes?!�

�Possibly,� Jack said, as though he was
pondering what to do. �Could I at least have my sheets back?� Slap!
Jack�s head whipped back as his sopping black sheets smacked into his face. �I
didn�t deserve that,� he muttered tilting his head in the same �oh well�
manner.

While Jack gathered his sheets inside, Scarlet
slightly regretted having thrown her only means of cover at Jack�s face and
clung to the ship�s hull as best she could. Sticking her lip out in a baby�s
pout, she slapped the water. However, she soon regretted that too, for she
slipped off the side of the ship and went under the water for a few moments
before she grappled onto the side again. She lifted her head and shouted, �WELL?!�
Her dress floated down and flopped onto her head, creating a tent for the clown
with dripping makeup. �Well!� she shouted huffily, and she threw the
dress off her head. �I �ave never!�

�And now you have, love!� Jack shouted from his
window, and then it sharply shut.

Scarlet gathered her skirt in front of her, her
legs floundering through the water. �Didn�t even fthrow da�n me knickers!� she
grumbled. She heard the creak of the window swinging open. Said knickers
dropped onto her head as well. (A/N: Though now that I think about it, she�s a
whore. What does she need underclothing for? <shrug> I�ve got to stop
interrupting my own story...)

Sticking her lip out, Scarlet swam shakily to
shore and walked up onto the dirty black sand, dripping as she threw her dress
over her head and stepped into her knickers. She was sad that Jack had
basically kicked her out and was sure that her night was completely ruined, but
she soon heard a whistle and looked up to see a rather shady man leaning
against the wall of an old brick building.

He nodded his head toward the sign above his
head: L'H�tel Perdu d'Amant. Scarlet smiled deviously and sauntered over to the
door of the lodge. Simply walking straight past the man, not looking at him and
without even stopping, she held out her left hand which she quickly closed over
�3 ha�pence. Perhaps the rest of the night would not be so miserable.

≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈

Back on the Black Pearl...

Jack was seemingly calmly spreading his
drenched sheets onto the intricately carved table in the middle of the room. He
worked slowly, stiffly, spreading each corner carefully over to the edge of the
table. His face was still and rigid as he pressed the water out from the sheets
and onto the ground beneath his feet. When it was completely flat against the
thick wooden board, he stood straight for several minutes, his eyes fixed on
the drying fabric.

And then...

�RRRAAAAAGGGHH!!�

The table was flipped, the chairs overturned,
and papers were pushed off the desk. Maps fluttered to the floor, forgotten.
The once-perfectly flat black sheets crumpled upon the wooden planks.
Knick-knacks and ornaments clattered to the ground, their beauty and shine no
longer able to distract.

Jack was on the ground, on hands and knees, his
breathing heavy, eyes blazing. The twisted, braided locks of hair fell around
his sweaty face like a fringed curtain. Scarlet, he thought. Of all
people, why Scarlet?! Jack let out another roaring, frustrated yell and
pounded the wooden floor with his fist. After a moment, he realised his breath
was held and he exhaled a shaky, heavy sigh, and closed his eyes tightly.

Getting up off the ground, Jack brushed off his
loose britches and trudged back over to his bed. He stopped at the footboard
and grasped his faded and tattered white shirt, dark cloth vest, and smooth,
worn leather frock coat. Untying his effects and belt from the jacket, he lay it
down on his bed and slipped his shirt over his head. Then his arms glided
through the vest and propped up his pillow. Jack lay down slowly, and, pulling
his coat up around him, his lips let loose a small sob. But would Jack actually
cry? No, of course not, so as his lips curved into a half-sneer, his mind raced
to the previous evening when the Pearl had drifted
into Tortuga and then later, when he entered
the Serum Pub.

TBC!!!

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A/N: M�k, so now Jack is more like himself in Pirates
of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. Preview of next time: Jack
has a FLASHBACK of... well, �the previous evening when the Pearl
had drifted into Tortuga and then later, when
he entered the Serum Pub.� I had sort of wanted to stick the FLASHBACK on the
end of this chapter, but instead I cut�n�paste what I had at the end here, and
put it into Chapter 5 (Coming Soon...)

OLD A/N for the
chidduns of FanFiction.Net: I thought it might be fun to include this if you�re
in the mood for funnies...
Also, one last tiny note: I�ve gotten a couple of e-mailed
reviews from people that were--oh how shall one say?--less than friendly. These
PWSNBN (People-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named) have said that I was too descriptive on
the last bit of Chapter 3 when Jack and Lela kissed. Not you Mary the Stranger,
^_^ your review wasn�t one of them. All you said was �is there going to be any
lemon? Lime I can deal with but not lemon.� I can totally live with that. But I
got a couple of flamey e-mails that I did not like. They were
quite rude and uncalled for, some speaking of the above, and some just saying
that the story �sucked ass�. Well what the hell does that mean?? �Sucked ass�??? If you want the story to
be better, tell me what can be better and specifically what �sucked
ass.� Until then, here�s what I have to say to all those PWSNBN:

If ye don�t like me cookin�,
Please don�t start bitchin�,
Step away and stop lookin�,
And get outta me kitchen!

Okay? Good. Ta!

Love,

~*Kitty*~
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The Siren Song of Pirate Fire