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Forget Me Not	By : Ladykohl Category: Star Wars (All) > General Views: 22071 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Star Wars movie series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Prologue
- 2-Part 1
- 3-Part 2
- 4-Part 3
- 5-Part 4
- 6-Part 5
- 7-Part 6
- 8-Part 7
- 3
- 4
- 5
Part 3
"Goodness is the light that pushes the darkness away,
though neither can be extinguished completely."

- Anonymous

I grind myself against her dripping center as her
eyes dark with passion. Her hands are restless as
the roam, caressing my back and shoulders, and her
breasts brush against my chest as our bodies rock
in time. All I can do is gaze at her sweet, precious
face and the wonderful way it contorts with pleasure.
The way she licks and bites her lips. I can feel
myself growing harder inside her as she lifts her
hips up to meet my thrusts - never quite releasing me
from the warmth of her depths. She leans up and
places soft kisses on my neck. A moan escapes me
as I grip her hips tighter and I push myself deeper.
She lets out a soft cry, her breath warm against my
skin. Though, somehow, all I can feel is the cold.

�I love you, Anakin...� She whispers in a short,
stolen breath. She loves me. Nothing matters more than
that. Not the Council or the Republic. Just the two of
us and our love. Damn everything else.
Please, gods, please. Let us remain together.
I roll us over so she is sitting astride me. She
moves over me as though she were riding a gualaar at
a gallop through the a meadow back on Naboo. I pull
her head down and catch her lips with my mouth,
groaning as her soft tongue duels with mine. If she
were as good with a light saber as she was with her
tongue she could have matched even me. I can taste
the sweat beading her skin. I can taste her warmth.
Everything about her tastes so good.
�Anakin, oh gods!� She cries out as she pulls her
lips away from mine and rotates her hips quickly to
meet my upward thrusts. The feel of her inner walls
tightening around me almost sends me over the edge,
but I don�t want this to be over. I never want it to
be over. I want to be like this with her forever - my
cock fully sheathed in her hot, tight core, her
moaning my name and calling out to the gods. It feels
so perfect...so good. My heart is racing, my breathing
is ragged and unsteady. I�m only getting hotter.
Only getting colder...
�Padm�...I love you so much!� Her only response is an
unsteady moan from deep inside her throat. I grab her
by the hair and force her to meet my eyes. I can feel
the fire in them and I�m sure she can see it. �Come
with me.� I demand in a harsh whisper. She impales
herself on my hard shaft one more time and screams as
my hot essence spills inside of her. We jerk against
each other - rocking our hips frantically as
we plunge together over the cliff.
But before our mutual orgasm even has time to subside,
the horridly familiar blade of the red light saber
bursts through her belly once more. Somehow I had
known this was coming. Padm� meets my terrified gaze
with one of her own and then the equally horridly
familiar blank, dead look falls over her face like
a black veil.
�No!� I yell. The light saber disappears and Padm�
falls against me. I hold her tightly and clench my
eyes shut. I won�t let her die this time. I won't!
�Padm�...Padm�...� I plead, the tears running down
my sweaty face. She does not stir. I�ve lost her.
Again. I open my eyes and I can feel them burn
yellow as I let the dark side course through me. But
it is not Darth Vader holding his weapon out towards
me as I had expected.
It is the Emperor.
It is the Emperor who has killed Padm�, the Emperor
who has destroyed everything. Not Anakin. Not Vader.
Not me. Palpatine's crooked smile widens under his
engulfing hood and he laughs.
He laughs while the slave girl from Danumar cries
at his feet.

****

CORUSCANT

Lord Vader�s Official Imperial Quarters

I started awake and jerked up into a sitting position
in my bed, panting and soaked in sweat. I sensed someone
standing over me and I grabbed out immediately for the
throat of whomever it was. A soft and startled cry met
my ears and I knit my forehead together. I was not yet
fully awake and I could not see who it was in the the
darkness but the presence I felt was familiar.
�Padm�?� I whispered, a dull stab of something like
hope stung just below my heart, though I did not
quite understand why. I knew Padm� was dead and it
was insanity to expect her there at my side. I
did not even understand why I wanted to see her. What
would I have done? What would I have said? As
consciousness began to take on a more steady hold
I flicked the fingers of my free hand to bring
the lights up. My lips curled when I realized it was
not Padm�, but the girl whom I hated more every
time she came into my sight.
I did not stop to wonder what was more disturbing; the
fact this slave had been hovering over me as I slept -
or that for a brief moment I'd entertained the hope
the presence was Padm�.
�What are you doing?� I asked through clenched teeth,
squeezing her neck harder, not really caring if she
could breathe or not.
�...You were...having a nightmare.� She rasped. I
slapped her hard with the back of my free hand and
she fell to the floor in a heap. I slowly swung my
legs over the side of the bed and stood to tower
over her.
�Did I ask you what I was doing, slave?� She shook
her head mutely as she started a half-hearted
backward crawl. My anger began to subside slightly
as the satisfaction from her obvious fear began to
seep in like a soothing drug. It was really was
very addicting.
�I...I thought...you needed waking.� She stammered
out. I pondered on this for a moment, letting the
silence stretch out. I noticed the anger which
usually accompanied the sound of her voice and
the sight of her face was failing to make an
appearance. Perhaps I was too tired to muster up
any real emotion, or perhaps her comment had
sparked some unexpected curiosity on my part. I
knelt down to where she crouched in a protective
huddle.
�Why do you care whether I endure a nightmare or not?�
She closed her eyes for a moment, then looked at me.
�I suppose it is the mother in me that cannot bear
to see such restless sleep.� I stared at her for a
long moment. A mother? The Emperor had taken this
woman away from her husband and children to torture
me. A strange feeling flowed through me at the
thought. At first I could not identify it and it
confused me. It was almost as though I was
feeling - sympathy for her. Unable to look at the
girl any longer, I stood up and turned away from her.
�You have children.� It was a statement, not a
question.
�Yes, milord.� I looked down for a few moments and
then turned back to look at her.
�How old?� Confusion creased her brow. I couldn't
blame her. I wasn't exactly sure why I cared to
know either. Some sort of morbid curiosity perhaps?
�My son is three galactic standard years.� She
said softly. I don't know what was running through
her mind, but I know she couldn't have trusted that
my motives for asking about her children were either
idle or innocent. �My daughter, she turned two just
yesterday.�
The same unidentifiable feeling from minutes before
burned in my chest. Perhaps it was the forced
separation from my own children leading me to
empathize with the girl�s plight. I took a deep
breath and held my hand out to her. I wasn't entirely
sure whether I was intending to help her up or twist
her arm once she took my hand. She hesitated, a look
of trepidation suffusing her face, before she finally
accepted.
Why I was tolerating her I could have attributed
to being so confused and still quite tired. I was
quiet for a long few moments and her obvious
discomfort as I stared at her brought to me some of
the familiar satisfaction of having so much power
over her. A feeling I was more comfortable with. I
let out a short laugh from the back of my throat and
smiled crookedly at the girl. I gestured towards the
balcony. She looked toward it, then nodded and
walked out into the Coruscant night. I watched her
disappear outside, pulled on a pair of sleep pants,
and followed her.
She watched me cautiously and kept her distance as
I leaned over the railing. I could sense her anxiety
as her little mind seemed to be forming a plan. To
push me over, perhaps? Ignorant girl. Even if she had
been able to get near enough to fulfill this task,
I would have just landed on the nearest speeder, killed
the occupant, and returned to kill her within seconds.
She seemed to think better of her plan - if she had,
indeed, had any at all - for she came no nearer to me.
I took a deep breath, but did not look at her.
�Were you married?� I asked, again not understanding
why I wanted to know. She did not respond right away.
�... Yes.� She answered quietly. I looked at her
finally, appraising the way her arms were folded
nervously across her chest, the rigid way in which she
stood. Her hair was pulled back out of her face, and I
noted indifferently how quickly it grew. Down a little
past her ears already. I was not there when she cut it
the first time but I would enjoy watching her cut
it the next time. If she were still alive.
�And whatever became of your husband?� I asked, a
slight grin playing at the corners of my mouth. As I
became more alert my hate for the woman who stood on
my balcony intensified. I was becoming increasingly
frustrated with myself for having been nearly civil
with her. She looked away from me and out over the
city.
�He was killed.� She said simply, then, for some
reason, she looked back at me. �The Emperor ordered him
killed.� I tilted my head, and turned around, leaning
backwards on my elbows over the rail.
�Yes,� I chuckled. �He does that often.� I saw a flash
of anger in her eyes which she hid from me by quickly
glancing down. I smiled and approached her, taking her
gently by her upper arms. I was feeling a bit better
having upset her. Your children are probably dead,
too.� I said mockingly. Whatever foolishness it was
that had overtaken me earlier was now gone. All that
remained was the desire to hurt her. And I could think
of no words better than those to do the job. She
looked up at me and wrenched out of my grasp. I laughed
cruelly. �I only mean to prepare you.�
She slapped me.
Her eyes widened and her hands went to her mouth in
horror as she realized what she had just done. Before
she could run or even stammer out an apology, I
grabbed her by the waist and plunked her down on the
rail - dangling her torso over it. She screamed and
threw her arms around me. Her disgusting warmth so
close to my body only served to fuel my rage. Not only
had she hit me, but how dare she be so warm when I was
so cold inside?
�I think I just may drop you,� I said calmly, though I
was anything but calm. All I wanted to do at that
moment was let her go. To be rid of her and her brand
of punishment...and to be rid of the irritating
ambivalence she created within me. �My master could
not possibly care too much for you or he would have
kept you for himself.�
�No!...gods, no!� She screamed, struggling madly to
pull herself back up. I couldn't help but notice she
made sure not to utter the word �please�. I almost
willed her to let it slip. �Pull me back up, master!
I swear I will never do such a thing again!�
�I should think you would never do such a thing again
if you are dead either.� Was my response. She screamed
in deep, gasping sobs - no longer able to speak. Her
terror was nearly as tangible as her body. I closed my
eyes to it just for a few moments, enjoying the way it
pounded against me through the Force. When I opened
my eyes, I watched her like that - dangling and
crying - for a short while. I took in the look of pure
terror sharpening her features, the way her usual
perfect color was drained completely from her face,
and the uncontrollable shuddering wracking her body.
Her eyes were wide and filled to the brim with one
horrible question. Would I truly do as I had
threatened? Would I truly let her go? What evil
dwelled inside me that I could take such pleasure
from such a scene?
With that thought I pulled her back up.
She threw her arms around me, clinging to me tightly,
still shaking from her ordeal. I was surprised by
this action - surprised and taken back. She cried
softly in to my bare chest, muttering something about
only wanting to see her children alive one last
time - thanking me for sparing her. I stood still, my
arms stifly at my sides, allowing her to embrace me.
I was too bewildered by her actions and could think
of nothing else to do. After a moment the smell of her
hair - too much like Padm�s - combined with the same
warmth that had so frustrated and angered me earlier -
brought me out of my haze of disorientation.
I shoved the girl away from me violently, sending her
flying to the cold stone floor.
�Leave me!� I commanded her furiously. She wasted no
time in scurrying to her feet and doing exactly what
I asked. In a flash she vanished into the apartment.
I leaned back over the railing and ran a shaking hand
through my hair.
Would I ever again know peace?

****************

�To not be in control of your own life is unbearable.
Having your life controlled by darkness? Hell.�

- Daniel Allman

I hate him.
Danumar had a certain harshness to it. Slaves were
not treated well most times, and yes, their children
were made to do labor. Women were raped on the streets
and war had done little to help the situation. But the
family Tiridu, my family, had been different. We had been
noble, and kind...honorable and generous. We had done
what we could to help those who needed our aid and
sympathy. Daharshi�s family had been similar in their
charitable interests. The people who gossiped about
Daharshi and the slave girls had been liars and I had
thought them despicable. But I never hated them. I had
never hated anyone in my life. There had never been a
need. Hate was such an ugly thing...but now I had been
forced in to slavery - my husband had been murdered,
perhaps not at his bidding, but because of Lord Vader.
Now I found that hate came easily and readily.
Since that first night on the star destroyer, I
wanted Vader to suffer as I had suffered - for what
he�d reduced me to. Though I wished I could see the
Emperor�s head on a platter, I knew there was nothing
that I could do to him. He was much too powerful and
not within my reach. But when it came to Vader, there
was one thing I could do. The Emperor wanted to catch
him at something. Some treachery. I was determined to
see that he got what he wanted. I was determined to see
that he paid for what he had done to me.

****

STAR DESTROYER, OUTER RIM

Vader was gone from the room. I knelt sobbing and
holding my head that still burnt from having had
a good hand full of hair ripped from it...
And then I heard something. A faint voice calling
my name.
Si-Nia...Si-Nia...
I swallowed and looked hesitantly around. I felt
suddenly so...calm. I could feel the tears begin to
dry on my face and the throbbing in my head begin to
subside. The strange voice seemed to be coming from
everywhere and nowhere at once. It instructed me to
go to the viewing room. I stood - confused, but no
longer hesitant. I trusted this voice implicitly and
wished to do what it told me to do. I took a deep
breath and walked toward the door, leaving that dark
creature�s room, I entered the corridor...
I seemed to follow my feet blindly for several
minutes before I came to a large door in a quiet
corner of the ship - having met no guards or other
personal that may have caused trouble for me. Somehow
I knew the voice had made sure of that. I looked over
the door I found in front of me. Engraved clearly in
Aurebesh above the metal frame were the words �viewing
room A�. I punched in the pass code on the key pad and
the door beeped and slid open immediately. I walked
into the room and the door shut behind me.
I could not keep my mouth from dropping open in awe.
I had never seen anything like it. The room appeared
to be a balcony over looking the stars. No ceiling.
No walls. Just...open space. It never occurred to me
that some sort of shield was protecting me from the
outside vacuum. All I knew was the view was one
of the most beautiful things I had ever seen in my
life, and I was safe. Looking out in to the vast sea
of sparkling stars I wanted to fall in to the never
ending black abyss. I wanted to let it swallow me
whole. It seemed so serene...so breath taking. I
wondered vaguely why such a monster had a room like
this on his ship. Surely he could not appreciate its
majesty.
�Quite an imposing view.� Came a dark, accented voice.
I turned to the center of the room abruptly to see
where the image of the Emperor appeared via a holocom.
I fell to my knees in �respect� in an instant. I heard
him laugh lightly. �You followed my Force prompting
very well. I must say. I am...impressed.�
Force prompting. That is how I seemed to know where
this room was, how I knew the pass code to get
in. Suddenly the calmness engulfing me lifted and
I felt sick. The Emperor had been inside my mind.
There was no where for me to escape to.
I looked up at the Emperor sadly.
�You can manipulate the Force?� I asked, fear and
misery at all this implied dripping from my words.
His only response to my question was an ugly smile.
�Have you any news for me?� He inquired as though he
and I were good friends meeting over a nice meal. I
wanted to kill him, or let him kill me, anything for
this to be over.
�Your Highness, I have only been in Lord Vader�s custody
for--� A cold hand seemed to close around my throat. I
already recognized the sensation. I wondered how many
times I would have to endure it before the night
cycle was over - or if I would even be alive at the end
of it.
�I know very well how long you have been with my
apprentice.� He stated calmly. �My question was -
have you any news for me?� I thought hard and tried to
push away my fear to think more clearly, to think of
anything that could have been of any use to him...and
then my eyes widened as I realized I did have
something akin to news for the wicked creature that
owned my life. I nodded fervently...and the hand was
gone from my neck instantly.
�Well?�
I took a quick breath.
�I heard a young man in-in the sitting room. It
seems Lord Vader has been looking in to the death
of a woman. A senator. She died on...Polis Massa.� I
paused. �I believe she may have been Lord Vader�s
lover...there was mention of children. He was
quite...disturbed by the revelation.� I looked down.
�I am sorry. That is all I heard.� The Emperor said
nothing for a long moment.
�This information you have brought me is very
enlightening. It seems young Vader does not trust
me any more than I trust him.� I did not understand
how he had come to that conclusion, and I did not ask.
�Very interesting.� A pause. �As always, Mistress
Rohar...it was a pleasure.� He bowed mockingly...and
was gone. I stood - anger and frustration tingling in
every nerve ending. Suddenly the room did not seem
so beautiful anymore.
On the way back to Vader�s chamber...I stopped in
the kitchen for something to cut my hair but only
found a cream knife.

****

I had never known such cruelty was possible...let
alone that a man could take pleasure from inflicting
so much pain on those weaker than himself. I had heard
what he�d done while on Tagoh. He had murdered
seventeen political leaders - among them, Quendo
Markin...a very good man who had been working hand in
hand with leaders from my own planet to abolish
slavery in the galaxy for good - and their families
and any of their friends that he learned of. I was
unaccustomed to such darkness. My disbelief, my utter
astonishment, forced me to ask a question I would
forever regret.
�Do you enjoy it?� The simple words slipped from my
mouth as I watched the naked Lord Vader go over
information on his data pad. I had been surprised to
see what he looked like under the suit and it made me
hate him more. A machine, cold and calculating, I
could see murdering without reservation. A man? Just a
simple young man? That somehow made it so much worse.
His cold eyes rose to look at me and, though I knew
he would punish me for it, I could not help but
continue �Hurting those who cannot fight back?�
What I had to endure for an immeasurable amount of
time was worse than any force choking or hair pulling.
He had made my body his, and it had never been
invaded or used. I had never given it up to anything
but love, to anyone but my husband. This man
desecrated that. Pumping his dirtiness, his
evilness into me. Making me just as unclean as he. I
would never have let him touch me...and there he was,
inside me. Plundering my weak body. Destroying me. I
would have preferred that phantom noose around my
neck, choking the life out of me to what he was doing.
I would have preferred anything else.
�Padm�...� That name rose faintly to my ears. The name
he had told me never to speak. Who was she...and why
was I being made to pay for whatever she had done to
him? �Fuck me.� He demanded. I knew that if I didn�t
do what he asked, he would kill me then and there.
Such was his mood. I complied, disgusting myself as
I did so. There could never exist a more shameful act.
I should have just let him kill me but I was not
strong enough for that.
When he left me, naked, bruised, and shaking, I
cried into my hands for a long time. He went back to
his business as though nothing had happened. Perhaps,
to him, nothing had. I was not just a slave anymore - he
had made me his whore. I could have fought harder, I
could have begged for death, but I didn�t. Fear kept me
from it. Vader made me confront the darkest part of
myself that night. I was weak and had never been
anything but.
I was nothing.

****

CORUSCANT

Lord Vader�s Official Imperial Quarters
I sat huddled against the darkest corner in my little
room - my legs pulled up to my chest. The monster
slept a room or so away. I stared across the room
through the darkness at nothing. Thoughts of hate and
death ran through my tired mind. It would not be hard
to end my life, but I was afraid of death. I knew
that now. I could not continue to pretend that my
only reason for continuing to allow myself to live
this way was the hope that I might one day see my
children again.
That was when the thought occurred to me. The thought
to kill Lord Vader.
As the plan began to form in my mind I could feel my
face become hot and my heart begin to pound furiously.
He was asleep. He would be defenseless. I could
strangle him, couldn�t I? His soul was something else
entirely, but his body was still human after all. I
could kill a human. What good would his Force tricks
do him in his sleep? My thoughts had gotten so far
away from me I had not even noticed I was up and
walking toward his room.
But I noticed when I was standing over his bed.
He lay there sweating and mumbling. A nightmare?
What could he possibly have been afraid of? I watched
him for a long moment. I watched his face contort in
what must have been fear. It was mesmerizing. It
filled me with such vindictive pleasure that I did not
even feel like myself. After a few more moments I
took a deep breath and leaned over him. All I had to
do was wrap my hands around his neck and squeeze as
hard as I could. If he woke up, I would have to fight
to keep them there...and maybe I could have. If I
wanted it bad enough, maybe I could have overpowered
him.
He shot up in his bed - and his hand was at my throat.
It was very clear at that moment that there was no
way I would ever be able to over power this man.
There was no way I would ever be able to kill him.
The fear I felt at that moment was only matched by the
overwhelming sense of hopelessness.
He believed my lie about waking him for his own
sake. Had he been more alert I doubt he would have.
The next few moments were a blur. I felt as though I
was dreaming as I tried to get my breathing and heart
rate back to normal. The things he said, the things
I said... whatever we did - none of it really
registered. None of it until...
�... Your children are probably dead too.� He had
said. And that pulled me violently back into his
world. I pulled out of his grip that I had only half
been aware of. He smiled wickedly at me. I did not
even hear his next words - so overwhelmingly furious
was I.
I slapped him before I even knew I wanted to.
A few terrifying minutes later I was right back where
I had started - huddled in the darkest corner of my
room. Except this time, I was waiting for Vader to
enter and make me pay for laying a hand on him. I
did not understand why he had let me go in the first
place. He had me hanging over a balcony above
Coruscant. He could have let fall, but he didn�t. I
could only assume that he had other things planned for
my punishment, and I shook with fear as I waited for
him to come.
And soon enough he did.
I shook violently as the dark figure walked slowly in
to my room and brought the lights up just enough so
that I could see the horrible twisted grin on his
face.
�... Master...� I started on a sob. �... No.� His
grin widened to a smile.
�Say please.�
****
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Forget Me Not