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Shadows of the Past	By : gallygaskins Category: 1 through F > Breakfast Club Views: 2280 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Breakfast Club and I do not earn any money from this fanfiction.

Chapter List
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Chapter 3

Claire sat down at her desk, the only well loved heirloom she had been lucky enough to procure from her grandmother when she’d died. Opening up the laptop in front of her she switched it on, waiting for the usual humming to stop as the computer warmed itself up and initiated the operating system. The scenic wallpaper of the lake in front of her popped up as the programs continued loading, she felt she must mentally remember to change it to something else now for added inspiration. Maybe a picture of John, she wondered. ‘You’d like that wouldn’t you’ she thought to herself smiling.

It had been two months since Claire had moved into the lake house and in that time she had managed to get it decorated and renovated to a high standard. Her desk sat in front of the picture and French windows that ran along the lake side of the house and the view was breathtaking. From her position she could look both to the north and south shores without even having to move. If only she could find a gardener now to help her sort out the wilderness that surrounded her immediate vicinity.

Opening up the latest chapter of her new book form her desktop, she pulled out her notebook and re-read through her transcript deciding upon what to write next. She had become a bit stuck with how to get to where she wanted to go having written the immediate following chapters in order to remember them. She leant back in her black leather director’s chair trying to contemplate what it was she wanted to say, not that she was in a rush to finish as she was already way ahead of schedule, and she was just suffering a little from writer’s block.

A rustling sound and some chatter from her left disturbed her path of concentration and she looked up to see what was making the noise. A man and a small boy were making their way down to the lake with some fishing gear merrily chatting as they went. ‘They obviously don’t know this is private property’ she thought and got up from her seat to go and speak with them.

Making her way through the open French windows she shouted to them from the top of the steps that led to the lake. “Excuse me, sir,” she shouted not wanting to startle the boy. “Excuse me,” she said, more forcefully, “Hey!”

Finally the man stopped, turned and retraced his steps back toward the house. “I’m sorry, did you want something?”

“You’re trespassing,” she merely offered to him, watching his piercing blue eyes take her in.

“I’m sorry, my son wanted to go fishing and so I brought him here to where I used to go, the previous owner didn’t mind and to be honest I thought they still had the place.”

“Well, they don’t, the owner’s wife died two summers ago and he decided to sell up as he had no time for the place, too many happy memories here I think.”

“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t know. So you took over?”

“Yeah, in March,” she muttered wanting the conversation to be over so that she could get back to her book, “look you seem like a reasonable guy and I don’t want to upset your son, feel free to carry on today.”

“Thank you, Miss?”

“Claire, Claire Standish,” she replied feeling good about not using her married name any more.

“No, it can’t be, Claire Standish, the Claire Standish that went to Shermer High?”

“Yes, that’s right,” she answered quizzically.

“It’s me, Claire, Andy, Andrew Clarke.”

“Andy?” Her eyes widening with shock at the prospect that this was indeed one of her old friends. She made her way down the steps towards the man and his son, “Oh my god, It is you. I didn’t recognise you from the top of the steps but to be honest I haven’t got my contacts in and I’m not that sure where I left my glasses. How are you doing?”

“Great,” he replied as the two fell into a hug and just as quickly out of it again. “This is my son, Jason.

“Hi, Jason, I’m Claire, I’m one of your dad’s old school pals.” She extended her hand out to him as she knelt down to his level.

“Say hello to Claire, he gets shy, sorry.”

“That’s ok,” she waited for the small boy to open up, taking him in. He was a smaller version of his father the same sandy coloured hair and intense blue eyes. He looked out from behind his father’s leg noticing her watching him, she seemed ok. He stuck out his little hand and quickly shook Claire’s in return.
“Would you like to come in for a coffee,” Claire asked, “I’ve just brewed a fresh pot.”

“Ok,” Andy replied he and Jason following Claire up to the house and leaving their tackle by the back door. “Wow this place has changed a bit, have you done all of this.” He asked surveying the window wall and the now virtual open plan living area before him.

“Yeah, well I had a bit of help, a builder that my father knew. Upstairs is pretty much the same though.”

“That’s good to know, you do realise that because of you bringing me and Allison up here with you that Spring we just couldn’t resist the atmosphere and slept together for the first time.”

“Really?” She asked motioning for them to take a seat. “If the truth be known, this was where John and I did too. It must just be this place, it hold’s so many good memories for me. Would Jason like a soft drink?”

She watched Andy as he asked his son if he wanted anything, the intensity of their relationship ever so apparent. She smiled, if only she could have had that. She turned away not wanting him to notice the pang of jealousy that she had just felt. “He’s fine,” Andy answered.

Handing Andy’s drink to him she took her seat opposite them, “whose Jason’s mother then, wait don’t tell me it’s that Shelby … what was her name …Goodwin?

“Shelly Godsworth, no, it isn’t her, thank god I was saved from that one,” he teased, and then added seriously, “it’s actually Allison.”

“Allison? Didn’t you guys split up when she decided to go off travelling?”

“Yeah, but she couldn’t keep away from me. Mind you, took her 11 years to come back. I’m just thankful she came back when she did, I was engaged to that Cherie Blake at the time, remember her?”

“Do I ever. All teeth and hair, what did you ever see in her?”

“She had a few charms,” he sniggered, “seriously though, I was on my Stag night, been round some of the bars, the guys getting me absolutely whacked and then there Allison was, a vision of untamed beauty standing in the doorway waiting to pick her moment to tell me how she felt about me. I don’t remember much ‘bout it but I do remember Bender telling me, ‘cause they’d kept in contact, that while she’d been away she’d realised she’d made the worst mistake in her life by leaving me behind. She’d believed, rightly or wrongly, that the only way she could truly accomplish her dream meant that she had to travel around the world exploring new cultures and meeting new people. But by the time she’d reached France she knew that she’d left her dream here, it was me all of the time.
“I was pretty mad for a while, broke off my engagement, which seemed to please Bender. He’d hated Cherie from the very moment I’d got with her. For months, I didn’t answer the phone or speak to anyone, rarely went out, just sat in my living room, watching football and baseball, drinking. John was good to me; he was the only one that kept coming around, brought Brian with him too. We were like the 3 Amigo’s or something for a while. Anyway, by the time I was ready to start dating again John, Brian and Allison had concocted this plan to get me to meet up with her again. And the rest as they say is history.”

“So what happened?”

“My version of events was this, John had given me details of this broad he’d met a few weeks before. I was to meet her in this bar and, if we got along, then we would go have some dinner, yadda, yadda, yadda. So, I get there at the allotted time and there’s no one there. I’m in two minds whether to leave when the barman tells me that this beautiful woman has asked for me and just popped to the Ladies to freshen up.

“I take a seat in one of the booths, look a bit stupid sat there on my own with a bottle of bud in my hand waiting for this woman to magically appear. I wait 15, no 20 minutes and still no one, I look back to the barman and he shrugs his shoulders, I don’t know what to do. Then the lights go dim and this record gets put on the Jukebox, ‘Big Spender’ it was. So, this woman appears at the door with like just a corset and fishnets on, a feather boa wrapped around her arms and she does this little dance towards me, by this time, I’m hysterical, don’t know whether to laugh or cry.” Andy paused momentarily to take a sip of coffee from his mug.

“I shout out ‘enoughs enough John, please stop this now its killing me,’ the woman comes over, she’s so mad, she slaps me. Its then that I realise the retreating figure is Allison, and you know as well as I that it would’ve taken a lot of guts for her to do what she did for me.” Claire nodded her head in agreement.

Andy carried on, “everyone’s staring at me as I get up from my seat and I follow her, I tentatively walk into the ladies and call out for her, she shouts for me to get out. I tell her ‘I’m not going anywhere’. She shouts at me again and I can hear her sobbing from within one of the stalls so I walk to the stall I think she’s in and push the door, it’s unlocked. She’s sitting there still in this black and red silky corset, streaks of black mascara have run down her cheeks, tears still flooding from her eyes.

“I get down on my knees in front of her and I try to take her hands. She pulls them away from me and hides her face to one side. ‘I’m sorry,’ I say, ‘I’m sorry, Al, I thought it was some stunt of John’s to make me feel human again, I didn’t believe for one second that that could’ve been you. Why did you do it?’ She explains that she thought if I could see that she was prepared to do anything to get me back then I would have her back. She was right of course. From the moment I first realised it was her I wanted her so badly.

“So we kiss and make up, I take her home with me; ask her to marry me that night and we’re married within the month. We now have two beautiful children, obviously you’ve met Jason, he’s 7 and his sister, Alexandria, is 5. And do you know I love Allison more every day and I couldn’t live without her. It was crazy we split up, but I think it was the best thing that could’ve happened as we both finally realised what it was we both needed, each other. How about you? I read you’d married the mayor or something, what happened to him?”

“We got divorced,” she said too curtly, not wishing to expand on her past anymore than was necessary, “and we don’t have any children, he couldn’t have any.”

“Oh, Claire, I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to pry, it really is a shame that of the five of us only Allison and me seem to be truly happy, although I think Brian’s doing ok and John’s just met someone new.”

“That’s great, I’m happy, Andy for everyone and myself. Extremely happy, I mean, I just got myself out of the worst relationship that I hope I’m ever likely to be involved in … that makes me ecstatic. Besides I have my work and this house. What else do I really need?”

“Nothing, I guess,” Andy got up taking his now empty cup over to the sink, “look we’re having a barbeque tonight at our rented out shack, why don’t you come along, might even have fish on the menu if we catch any.” He joked.

“I’d love to, where are you staying?” Claire asked, getting up from her seat and taking her cup over to the sink as well.

“Number 25 on the Long Beach Road,” Andy replied, picking up the earlier discarded fishing gear from the top of the stairs. “Come on, Kiddo; let’s see if we can get something to bite, hey?” Jason merely nodded. “It starts about 6.30 but I’m sure Allison would love it if you went over a bit before, after all you two have a lot to catch up on, Alex will be having her nap from about 3.30, always done it since she was a baby, takes after her old man! See you later then?”

“Yeah, bye Andy, Jason, see you both soon,” she called as she watched them thread their way back down to the lake. Stepping back inside the house she looked at the clock, 1.00 already. She anticipated that she wanted to be at their house for about 4.00 which meant that she would have to get a move on, the journey would take about 45 minutes and she had to change and get ready taking about another hour or so. She also had to have something to eat she was starving.

***

After finally putting the finishing touches to her hair and lightly touching up her make-up Claire was ready to make her way over to her friend’s house. She knew that her efforts weren’t particularly necessary but felt that her still pallid complexion of late needed a little something, nothing that a little sun wouldn’t help but she was still very self conscious about some of the scars that her body hadn’t quite got rid of yet, this meant there was no way she was ever going to sunbathe on view and the nearest tanning salon was over two hours away.

The 45 minute journey seemed to take no time at all and soon she was parking the BMW opposite the gateway to number 25, Long Beach Road. She got out and started to make her way down the path through the heavily stocked garden to the ‘shack’. Andy’s choice of phrase had made her assume that they were staying in one of the log cabins that were so often rented out but to her amazement the building that opened up in front of her was nothing less than a small mansion, ‘either Andy’s on good money or their not the only family staying here,’ she thought.

Turning the corner of the path she headed on down a slope that was taking her around the building to the rear, the path forked and she decided to take the upper track hoping it would lead to a deck area or the back door which it ultimately did. A dark haired woman, who Claire could just make out to be Allison, shot up form her seat as she heard Claire’s footsteps get closer to her and made her way over in Claire’s direction.

“Claire is that you? Andy phoned me to let me know you were coming. Oh my god it is, I’m so pleased to see you.” Allison threw her arms around Claire taking her into a hug that Claire had only been able to imagine for so long. She had missed Allison’s hugs. Their embrace ended and Allison looked Claire in the eye, “So how are you buddy, long time no see. What on earth have you been doing with yourself; you have to tell me everything.”

“Ok, ok, but let me sit down will you, I get tired quite easily these days.”

“Come on over here in the shade then, do you want a drink, tea, coffee, homemade lemonade, something stronger?”

“No, I’m fine for the minute, just glad to see my old friend.”

“How are things keeping? Andy mentioned you’d bought the old lake house that we all used to rent, done it up a bit as well.”

“Yeah, it just needed at bit of TLC. As you know, I knew the previous owner through my parents and when they told me that Mr Robinson was ready to give it up I got in contact with him and offered him a fair price for it. He was happy, I was happy, the transaction took place and here I am. Back where I truly belong and being able to write my books in a very serene environment.”

“Surely not on your own?” Allison asked, concern growing behind her features.

“Its as good a place as any, I can blend in with the locals and no one knows I’m here, suits me down to the ground.”

“I’m still not getting it, though, why would you want to be by the lake on your own. Claire you’ve always shared this place, you’ve always wanted everyone you’ve ever known to know about it, why do you think me and Sporto come up here most of the time?”

“Allison, I only ever shared this placed with one someone special, didn’t I? There was never any chance of me bringing up any other guys. This was John’s and my place, no one else’s. Besides Gordon would’ve hated it, nature and him never got on.”

“Gordon?”

“The mayor I married! Not that I want to talk about him,” Allison noticed Claire’s eyes as they flashed with hatred for him, “so, how are you?”

“I’m fine, we’re fine, and the kids are beautiful.”

“Hmm, Andy was telling me how you two finally got back together, that’s so great, I only wish I had been around to see your dance.”

“God, did he tell you about that,” Allison’s cheek flushed, Claire merely nodded. “I am still so embarrassed by that whole charade.”

“It made sure he stayed around though didn’t it, and look what you have to show for it.”

“Yeah, my heart would have died had I known that he’d had all of this with someone else.”

“Allison, he could never have this with anyone else, it just wouldn’t be the same.”

“I guess not, just glad I got back in time before he’d already got hitched, then we would’ve had a problem.”

Claire laughed, “what would you’ve done?”

“Don’t know, really. I guess I could have shot her or something, sounds a bit extreme I know. He never really was hers anyway, even if I hadn’t come back when I did.”

“Yeah, Andy mentioned that John didn’t like her.”

“No, nor Brian either, although I think that was because he fancied her himself.”

“What, Brian?”

“Yeah, kinda strange thinking ‘bout him ever being interested in anyone, let alone her,” Allison sniggered. “Is there anybody else in your life?”

“No, there never will be either, I can safely say I am off men. I can’t go back and I don’t want to go forward either. It would take a lot for me to trust someone again.”

“Claire, what’s wrong? Did Gordon do something bad to you? Andy said that you’re happier than you’ve been for a while. I was so sorry when we lost touch; I just wish I could’ve been around for you when you obviously quite badly needed someone.”

“Yeah, I missed that too. We were always there for each other weren’t we, the five of us. Al, he was horrible, the very worst of men, but this goes no further, please.”

“Why? What did he do to you?”

Claire was crying. “He hit me, he burnt me,” she looked up at Allison thinking back to their detention on that Saturday in March ’84 when John had shown Andy his burn wondering if Allison believed her or not. Allison moved from her own seat and took another next to Claire, her arm around Claire’s shoulders, Claire continued, “and all I could do was carry on loving him, I thought I could change him somehow. Finally, he …”

“Yes?” Allison soothed.

“He … I can’t!”

“What Claire, come on, we’ve been friends for too long, and something has obviously upset you so badly, a problem shared …”

“He … he raped me.” She barely managed.

“He did what?” Allison was furious, “Where, when, I want to know, tell me.”

“Allison, you have to promise me.”

“I promise, Claire. I’m not happy about it but I do promise you I will never breathe a word of this to anyone.” Allison said, reassuringly, “Shit, why the hell wasn’t I around, why weren’t any of us around?”

“Thanks, it wasn’t anybody’s fault least of all yours. It was mine for allowing him to get away with the things he did to me. Ever since he’d got that ring on my finger he felt it gave him the right to do anything to me. At first it was small things, insignificant things, mostly emotional trauma by virtue of his tongue but every now and then he’d hit me or punch me, generally in out of the way places so no one would notice. I’d wanted children so we tried and failed. We had tests done and it was conclusively found that he couldn’t have them but he used that as an excuse to throw me down the stairs and then go out and sleep with as many different women as he pleased, obviously with no consequences.

“The marriage had become more and more strained and although I was always the picture of beauty for those publicity rallies no one really saw what he was doing to me. In the public eye I was the happy and dutiful wife, behind closed doors I was a quivering wreck. So much so that I began to drop things because I was so gaunt and tired all of the time, I seemed to age 10 years overnight. This gave him all the excuse he needed to carry on bullying me. I dropped an ashtray on one occasion, he burnt me with his cigarette,” Claire pulled down the waistline of her skirt over her belly button so that Allison could clearly see what he had done. Allison shook her head, tears forming at the corner of her eyes wanting to hear the rest but knowing that the worst was yet to come.

Claire sniffed, pulling a handkerchief from out of her purse she wiped a tear that hung from the end of her nose and some that had rolled down her cheek. “By this time we were distant leading virtually separate lives, any publicity he did he did on his own, he never even asked me, it was as if I was already dead to him and to be honest that was what it had felt like. I personally hadn’t written a book in 3 years and my agent was getting twitchy. I spent most of my time at my parents or I rented the lake house if I had the opportunity. Disappearing suited me as it meant I was able to go away for a while and lick my wounds. After he burnt me I stayed away for about 4 months; in that time I consulted a lawyer about divorce proceedings and cited my petition. Everything seemed amicable and I was advised to move back into our home in order to get at least what I thought I was worth from the break up.

“About 3 weeks into my move back he struck, he’d been as pleasant to me over that time as he had been before we were married, and I knew something was up but thought maybe he wanted to try again. Maybe he’d had some help and he wanted to make it up to me for all of the things he’d done. He was just so god damn charming.

“That night I’d gone to bed early, tired as usual. He got himself drunk and decided he wanted me. He crashed through the door to my room waking me up; he pulled at the bedclothes and managed to wrestle them away. I can remember watching him watching me; he was drooling like some kind of rabid dog. It made me feel sick to my stomach as I knew what was coming.

“I tried to calm down the situation by talking to him but he wasn’t in the mood, I managed to keep getting out of his way until finally he flung himself at me and we landed on the floor with him on top of me. He pulled my nightdress up, tore my pants away and held me down as he undid his trousers. He muffled my screams with the palm of his hand as he raped me. All I kept thinking was ‘if I could only find the strength to fight back’ but it never came. When he’d finished he punched me in the stomach then my face, broke my nose. He picked me up and threw me against the wall like a rag doll, and then he kicked me to within an inch of my life. He stood over me and cried out ‘that’s what you get for trying to divorce me’. His face was a picture, his smiled at me, and he’d obviously relished what he’d done to me. Then he left.

“Don’t ask me how I did it but I managed to get myself to the phone and call my parents to come and get me only hoping that he wouldn’t be back before they’d got me out. An ambulance arrived to take me to hospital. My parents moved me out of Gordon’s house. Within 24 hours my father had had a restraining order raised against him and, thankfully, I have never heard from him since.

“But of course I couldn’t say anything to anyone because of who he is. I came out of that marriage with the money from my books and my sanity, that’s it. But if he should ever find out where I am then I don’t know what my chances will be, that’s why it has to be kept a secret. At least he knows nothing of you guys.”

“Why would you say that?”

“Because that’s the kind of person I’m dealing with, he’s not mafia or anything but he would rather see me dead than know I’m still out there somewhere with the opportunity to let the cat out of the bag.”

“What did you eventually cite in your divorce petition?”

“Irreconcilable differences!”

“Oh my god! Look Claire, this man can’t be allowed to get away with what he’s done.”

“He already has as far as I’m concerned and all I want to do now is lay low and try to forget about that part of my life.”

“None of this would’ve happened if,”

Claire cut her off, “if John had stuck by me instead of making me go off to University like that, on my own.”

“I wasn’t going to say that and he had his reasons at the time, not that I agreed with any of them. What I was going to say was … if I had been around, I mean, I know ultimately it would have been your decision to still go ahead and marry the son of a bitch but I would never have let him get away with what he’s done to you.”

“But who are they going to believe, he is such a charmer, everyone believes he is so different from what he actually is, including his umpteen mistresses. I just can’t believe that I have been so stupid to have been reeled in by his nice suits and his money. To be honest, I probably deserved everything I got, poor little rich girl.”

“Claire, don’t beat yourself up over it. He is obviously an evil bastard who doesn’t deserve the credit you’re giving him. But don’t you think you owe it to his next victim to tell someone about what he did?”

“What do you mean next victim?”

“This is what I mean,” Allison handed Claire the magazine she had been reading when Claire had first arrived, after opening it at the appropriate page. “He’s getting married again.”

“Oh, god. What am I going to do?”

“You’re going to have to think about it, but talk to me first, yeah?”
“Of course, can I keep this for a bit,” Claire asked, referring to the article.

“Sure!” Allison nodded. She then noticed her daughter standing in front of her and the still lamenting Claire, “What are you doing up, missy?”

“I thought I heard a car, mommy … maybe I was wrong,” Alex looked sad, “Who’s this?”

“This is mommy’s friend, the one that I was talking about with your father earlier on, this is Claire.”

“Nice to meet you", Alex stuck out her hand.

Claire took it, “nice to meet you,” she said, brightening, “not like your brother are you?”

“No, he’s shy, I’m not.” Alex turned quickly, “see told you mommy, car had stopped,” she ran up the path that Claire had earlier walked down. “Uncle Brian, Auntie Julia, Uncle John, who are you?” Claire and Allison heard her scream as she ran further up the hill.

“Do you want to fix your face before they get here?” Allison asked of Claire, smiling warmly.

“I think I’d better had.” Claire confessed, her sniffling now all but stopped.

“Ok, go in through the back door, second door on the right is a bathroom, I better go and greet them.” Allison stood and rushed up the hill after her daughter.

Claire had just made it through the back door when she heard Allison say her greetings to everyone. ‘This could be a long night,’ she thought before finding her way into the bathroom, ‘hopefully there will plenty for me to do to keep busy and out of everyone’s way.” And with that she was in the solitude of the bathroom making herself ready for the evening ahead.
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Shadows of the Past