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Heaven in His Eyes	By : Auska Category: 1 through F > Four Brothers Views: 1172 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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~Heaven in His Eyes~

By: Aerys Krystie.
oOo
Jeremiah had been the one to tell him that Jack’s brain activity had picked up in the last few days and that he was attempting to move his limbs. However, it seemed that some part of him was still locked away in the coma as he had yet to open his eyes. The spark of hope he felt died abruptly when he heard that Jack still hadn’t opened his eyes. What was he meant to do? How could any of them bring their little brother back from what was meant to be certain death?
The paramedics had almost declared Jack dead on the scene, but he coughed up more blood and his eyes opened. At first, everyone just kind of stared at him; none believing what they were seeing and hearing. It didn’t take the paramedics long to begin compressions and take him away. Bobby wanted to go with him, just to make sure nothing bad happened to him again. Unfortunately, the police were there as well and he knew they needed to answer the questions.
The next day, they got the news that Jack had slipped into a coma. Bobby knew that wasn’t a good thing, despite Jack still being alive. He focused on what was currently happening around him, such as the deal with Victor Sweet. He was itching for the chance to kick the shit out of that man and he did. After the hell Victor put him and his family through, Bobby felt he’d gone easy on him. He should have taken him to some remote shack in the middle of nowhere and left him to bleed out, which would call out the animals drawn to blood and they would eat him alive.
After getting the shit beaten out of him by the cops, Bobby lost himself in the repairs of the house. When Jack woke up, he would need to come back to a restored home. He kept an eye on the kids playing street hockey, knowing how rough they could get, if his days of playing in front of the Mercer house were anything to go by. These kids seemed a lot less violent than him, but it made him feel…something as he watched them. Maybe it reminded him of the simple times in life, before his mother and baby brother were taken from him. Maybe it was because hockey was the one thing that really brought his family together, before it was fractured.
He was working on the bricks when Jeremiah told him about the increased brain activity. It had taken six weeks for that to happen. Now, it appeared that Jack might not wake up, again. He had yet to see his brother at the hospital, not wanting to be reminded of his failure as a brother. He could almost hear Ma’s voice scolding him and telling him that he hadn’t failed, as Jackie was still alive. No. He might be alive, but he sure as fuck wasn’t living and that was a failure of him as a big brother.
Every night he would sit in Ma’s room, his back to the bed as he used to do when he was younger and just talk to her. She rarely said anything and would just listen to his troubles, as a teen and as a young adult. Bobby never really sought her out for advice, but just for a non-judgmental presence that he could talk to. She was the only one that knew everything about him. She knew what he’d done for his brothers in the past and what he would do for them in the future. She knew he carried the heavy burden of being the punisher in the house, as she couldn’t bring herself to raise a hand or her voice against her boys in anger.
Without her calming presence in the house, the boys were explosive. Without Jack’s calming presence in the house, the boys were a little less explosive, mostly because of the guilt that clung to them. All of them felt the guilt and shame of not being able to help Jack. Angel and Jeremiah knew that Bobby felt it worse, as he would with any of them, but Jack was the little brother; the one that had to be protected by his big brothers, even though he really didn’t need it. None of them had done their job that day, but it was Bobby’s responsibility to know where his brothers were at all times.
As he walked around the house at night, Bobby would often hear Angel talking to Sofi about the earlier days of when Jack arrived. He would laugh; the sound bittersweet as he recalled the way Jack had been such a scared little kid when he was brought home. “And still, Bobby always knew what to say to him to make him feel better.” Not anymore, Bobby would think sullenly and move on downstairs.
He looked around at the bullet holes in the walls. Their first priority had been to fix all the windows and walls. Thankfully, only the living room needed fixing up. The police had taken all the spent bullets from the walls and they had slapped plaster over them, which looked out of place against the warm colors of the walls. He didn’t want to change anything in the house, but the sofa and TV had been replaced. Jerry had demanded that they get a sofa that had a bed, in case Jack was unable to tackle the stairs immediately.
Bobby sat on the sofa, tilting his head back. Jerry was working hard to get his dream up and running again, without Sweet there to shut him down. Bobby was looking forward to that. True to his word, Jerry said that he and Angel had jobs waiting for them once the repairs on the house were done. However, when Jack got back, someone would need to be with him. It didn’t surprise him when Angel and Jeremiah told him that he should be the one to help Jack.
Clearly, they forgot what happened the last time he attempted to help Jack. His body took four bullets! How could they think he was fit enough to watch bacon, let alone their recovering brother? Ma had only been dead for a little over a week and already he was sending her company. Keeping his brothers safe was always the first priority for him, but he’d failed so badly already.
Sighing, Bobby stood up and left the house. He needed to blow off some steam. As he was down the street, he didn’t hear the phone ringing. It was left to Angel to answer and be told that Jack had opened his eyes, but that there was a problem. Angel didn’t remember much else of the conversation once he learned what the problem was. He just remembered breathing ‘oh fuck’ and then hanging up. That was going to kill Bobby.
oOo
Angel took to avoiding Bobby, which made the oldest Mercer raise an eyebrow. Somehow, every time he wanted to get Angel alone, someone would show up and the conversation would change. Bobby just needed to know what he’d done to piss off or hurt Angel to the point that he refused to be alone in the same room as him. His little brother thought he was good at hiding his emotions, by keeping that blank face, but they always seemed to forget that Bobby had taught them how to shield their emotions.
The only one that hadn’t bothered to hide what he was feeling was Jack. All three of them knew he was going to be nothing like them. He was the musician, the feeler and the poet of the family. That didn’t mean he couldn’t deal out a mean punch, as Jerry found out when he threatened Jack to destroy one of his vinyls. That was the first time Jack ever got physical with them. Jack definitely preferred to use his words, as he was sly with them and could twist just about anything around to benefit him and leave his arguer feeling like a complete moron.
Jeremiah tended to hide his true feelings behind the façade of thought. If someone pissed him off, his eyes would go soft, as though he was thinking about something. If someone hurt him, his eyes would go soft and he’d pretend to be thinking about something. He tried not to get physical, preferring to keep his attacks as stealth based as possible. He was just as underhanded as Bobby, but Bobby sometimes didn’t see the revenge coming. He soon learned to look for the signs.
Angel had been the most difficult for Bobby to work with. He hadn’t been like Jeremiah, who was already hiding his true emotions. Angel seemed to forget that when he was brought to Mercer house, he was just as emotional as Jack was. That was the first time that Bobby had to work with someone like that. Angel preferred to keep to himself for days on end, until he felt comfortable around his new brothers. Under Bobby’s watchful eye, he quickly learned to hide his emotions, but he would always be surprised whenever Bobby knew exactly what he was thinking and feeling.
Thanks to Angel, Bobby knew how to handle Jack. He knew that he had to be gentler in his approach and far more so than he had been with Angel. Unlike Jack, Angel had expressed his anger of what happened to him in the past, while Jack kept it all inside. Angel was a lot like Bobby in that sense, except his anger was quieter and a lot colder. Angel, Jeremiah and Jack knew that if Bobby was angry and quiet that it was a nuclear explosion about to happen. Angel and Jeremiah would duck for cover, while Jack tried to keep Bobby calm.
Oddly enough, as Angel and Jerry watched the two of them, they noticed that regardless of how angry Bobby was, he never raised his hand to Jack. They knew that if they were in the room, the fists would be flying and Bobby in a blind rage meant nothing was off-limits. If death occurred, it occurred. There was only twice that the blind rage had happened and the three others knew what set him off only once. The second time was a mystery to them and was the only time Bobby had touched Jack, shoving him away. It took all three of them to physically restrain him, which was no easy feat. Bobby had thrown them off him like they petals.
So Bobby decided to use his brain for once. He phoned Jeremiah. “Why’s Angel avoidin’ me?”
Jeremiah sighed, but didn’t speak for a long while. Bobby closed his eyes, expecting to hear the news that Jack had died while in the coma. That didn’t make sense, though. Angel would’ve told him something that important, regardless of how Bobby reacted to it. They knew he needed to know about Jack’s state and if he died, he needed to see his baby brother one more time.
“There’s a small…complication with Jack,” Jerry finally said and Bobby lowered the phone for a moment, composing himself. “He’s awake, but…”
“But what, Jerry?” Bobby demanded, feeling his anger spiking at his brother’s dithering. It would just be faster for them to tell him.
“He doesn’t remember anythin’, man.”
Bobby felt the world slowing and stopping around as those words sank in. “Wait, anythin’ as in the shootout or anythin’ as in…everythin’?”
Jerry exhaled shakily. “As in everythin’. The doctors are workin’ with him, but all he seems to remember is that his name’s Jack Mercer. He don’t know how he got in the hospital and…”
Bobby growled as Jerry trailed off again. “Stop doin’ that, Jerry! Just fuckin’ tell me what’s goin’ on!”
“He woke up sayin’ ya name, man. When he was asked about who Bobby was, he said he didn’t know. They said our names and he’d never heard of us, man. We’re complete strangers to him.”
Bobby was about to say something stupid, until he noticed something in Jeremiah’s voice. He was lying. He honestly had no idea why his brothers thought they could get away with that. Hell, he was the one that taught them how to lie convincingly, mostly because it was a skill all of them would need as Mercers. He sighed and tried to figure out which part his brother was lying about and decided it was all a lie, just to be safe.
“Wanna try not bullshittin’ me this time?”
Jeremiah exhaled sharply. “I’ll be around for dinner. Until then, stay away from Angel. I don’t need you to punch me out again.”
“It wouldn’t happen if ya didn’t fuckin’ lie to me, Jerry! Just tell me now or I’ll show up at work and cause such a scene that’ll have everyone questionin’ not only ya sexuality, but ya fuckin’ sanity too!” Bobby smirked coldly when he heard Jeremiah flinch over the phone.
“You are the only one he don’t remember,” Jeremiah finally said and Bobby’s eyes widened.
Bobby thanked Jeremiah for telling him and hung up, staring at nothing and unsure of where he was. Somehow, he made his way into Ma’s room and stayed there for the next two days. He couldn’t bring himself to believe that Jack had forgotten him. He’d done everything he could to help and protect that little fairy and that was the thanks he got for saving him?
All he could hear every time he tried to sleep was Jack screaming his name, begging for him to help him, pleading for him to save him. He eventually got there. Jack was alive, though. He was finally living again and that was all that Bobby ever wanted. He prayed for Jack to open his eyes and be the same as he was. He just wanted Jack back home, where he could keep an eye on him and protect him. However, if Jack didn’t know him from a bar of soap, how was he going to achieve that?
On the third day, Bobby left the bedroom and showered. He dressed in his usual attire of a sweatshirt and jeans and headed to the hospital. He parked and stared at the building. That was the first time he would be visiting Jack. He got out of the car slowly, not taking his eyes off the building. It filled him with dread, knowing that Jack wouldn’t recognize him. He wanted to know what he’d done that would make Jack want to forget him.
He found out what room he was in and headed for it. He wasn’t surprised when he was stopped by a doctor that wanted to ask him a few questions. Bobby barely paid any attention to him, looking through the window and watching as Jack laughed and smiled with Angel and Sofi. He remembered La Vida Loca but not his own brother? That stung more than knowing he wasn’t remembered. He’d been in Jack’s life longer and made a far bigger impact than she had.
As he watched his brother, Jack suddenly looked at him and tilted his head. He turned back to Angel and asked something. Angel nodded, taking a drink of water, which was spat out as Jack something. After he’d finished coughing, Angel got an incredulous expression on his face as he looked at Bobby and then back to Jack. Bobby didn’t have to be in the room to hear what Angel was saying. It was clear that Jack said something that took him by surprise and he wanted to make sure Jack knew what he was saying.
“I’ve been told that you’re aware he doesn’t remember you?” the doctor asked for clarification and Bobby glanced at him, nodding. “We aren’t sure how strong his mind is, so we ask that you don’t strain it for him.”
Bobby nodded again and the doctor stood to the side. He suddenly realized why Angel had been avoiding him. It seemed obvious that he’d been visiting Jack and trying to jog his memory. He wondered suddenly if there was any point to him being there. If Jack didn’t remember him with all the stories that Angel told him, how could he expect his presence to do anything aside from make him uneasy?
Before he could turn to walk away, Angel ran to the door. If he could read his brothers so easily, he knew they could read him just as well. “Bobby, he wants to meet ya, man.”
Bobby shook his head, refusing to look at Jack. He could feel his baby brother’s eyes on him, pleading for him to enter the room so they could get the mess straightened out. He didn’t want to know why Jack forgot him. He didn’t want to see the blank gaze as Bobby brought up memories that Jack probably didn’t have. He mumbled something to Angel about it being too soon for him to see his failure and left.
Waiting by the elevator bank, Bobby rolled his eyes as Angel’s hand landed on his shoulder. He spun around and punched his brother. Angel rubbed his jaw and stood up, swaying slightly. He shook his head, glared at Bobby and followed him into the lift. Before he could lay into him about being a coward, two nurses got in after them. So, Bobby figured he’d gotten out of a lecture, but Angel seemed to have other ideas.
“He’s ya fuckin’ brother, man!” Angel hissed as they stood behind the nurses.
“And he don’t fuckin’ remember me, either. Why would I wanna sit in a room with someone who don’t know me and talk about shit he don’t remember?” Bobby shook his head and ignored the way the nurses glanced back at them uneasily. “I failed him, Angel.”
“You didn’t fail him, bro.” Angel sighed and ran his hands over his head. “You saved him, Bobby. You know that he can’t deny any order from ya, so he made sure he breathed. Ya can’t ask for anythin’ better than that, man.”
“I can, actually,” Bobby stated and punched the side of the elevator. He still ignored the nurses that jumped at the bang. “I can ask that the little fairy fuckin’ remembers me!”
“Sir, are you—?”
“Don’t touch me,” Bobby warned and the nurse raised an eyebrow and grabbed his wrist. He growled and pulled it back. She seemed to finally get the message and nodded, trying to stand as far as possible from him. “I tried talkin’ to Ma about failin’ her…”
“Bobby, man, ya gotta stop seein’ it as a failure! He’s alive and he’s awake now! And he thinks he’s done somethin’ wrong because you won’t see him!”
With a sigh, Bobby finally looked at Angel and saw that his face was carefully guarded. “What did he say that had ya spittin’ ya drink out, man?” He smirked when Angel’s widened and he looked down.
“He…Ah…He was a little disappointed that y’all are brothers. I told him it don’t matter because we’re adopted, but he didn’t seem happy with that.”
Bobby raised an eyebrow, trying to understand what Angel was saying. His eyes finally widened and he actually felt a blush creeping onto his face. He cleared his throat and looked down, placing a hand over his face as he tried to calm down. He never thought that his baby brother would think that way of him. However, he was grateful that he could blame the amnesia. Without a doubt, if Jack remembered their relationship, he wouldn’t be disappointed in knowing he couldn’t fuck his brother.
“If I agree to see him, will ya get off my fuckin’ back about it?”
“That’s all we want, man. The docs say that if he spends time with ya, his memory might come back. And ain’t that what ya want?”
Bobby nodded as the elevator doors opened. He frowned as he realized there were more than just the two nurses in the compartment and wondered how many had heard about his little brother finding him attractive. He watched as the numbers climbed up again and glanced at Angel. He wanted him to stay in the room with them, as he wasn’t sure how Jack would handle being alone in the room with him.
Just as he was about to bring it up, Angel said that he needed to get Sofi back as it was her brother’s birthday. Bobby just nodded, figuring something would’ve come up to leave him alone with Jack, because clearly he hadn’t been punished enough by whatever deity he’d pissed off. He stepped out of the elevator with Angel and made his way back to the room
As soon as the door opened, Jack’s face went from excitement to confusion to shyness in a matter of seconds. It was actually quite interesting. When Bobby walked in, the shyness took over and he lowered his head, reminding Bobby of the scared eleven year old that came to live with them. He’d known Jack for nearly half of his life and it still stung that he wasn’t remembered.
Angel and Sofi left, saying they’d be around tomorrow to see him and Bobby stood at the foot of the bed, hands in the pockets of his jeans. He had absolutely no idea how to start off a conversation with Jack, especially as he was expecting him to have his memory. Jack didn’t seem too keen on talking to him, either, as he stared at the blanket and idly plucked at a thread.
“So, ya disappointed I’m ya brother, huh?”
Jack’s head ducked even more and Bobby smirked as he saw the flush on his pale skin. “I asked Angel not tell you that. I know you already hate me for not remembering you…I didn’t wanna give you another reason to hate me.”
Bobby sighed and pulled his hands out of his pockets, the smirk dropping from his face. “I don’t hate ya, Jackie. I’m worried about why it’s only me that ya forgot. What do you see when ya think of how you learned to skate?”
Jack looked up and stared at Bobby, the blush dying off. “I learned to skate?”
Bobby frowned, but nodded slowly, before he began pacing by the foot of the bed. He wondered, for a brief moment, how frustrating it must be for Jack to know he had three brothers, but only remembered two. “Do you remember when ya first arrived home?”
Jack flinched and nodded. Bobby paused when he saw tears in his eyes. “I remember your voice telling me that you’ll fight off the monsters, but I don’t remember you ever being there. Every time I think about it, I only seen Angel and Jerry in the living room, wrestling. Then out of nowhere, your voice appears in my ear. I didn’t know who it belonged to, until I heard you speak.”
He slumped back on the pillows and Bobby wondered if he should leave. Jack looked exhausted. He watched as his baby brother gritted his teeth and sat up, moving his right shoulder. He had no idea what condition the wounds were in, as that hadn’t been the most important thing to him. Knowing his brother had amnesia seemed to drive everything else from his mind.
“I remember everything in my life, except when it’s just you and me, apparently. Or if the others come in, you’re not there or you’re replaced with Angel or Jerry.” Jack sighed and lowered his eyes. “I woke up saying your name, but I have no idea who the fuck you are.”
“I ain’t gonna force ya to remember me, Jackie. Do ya remember my voice sayin’ anythin’ else?”
Jack looked up with a slight frown, but nodded slowly. “Yeah…You wanted me to breathe, but it wasn’t during the shootout at home.”
“Pickup game when you were thirteen. Some fucks pushed ya into the glass, which knocked the wind outta ya.” Bobby shrugged, grateful that Jack at least remembered something about him. “You don’t need to force it, Jack. You did go through a very traumatic experience.” He headed for the door.
“Bobby,” Jack called and Bobby stopped, turning back to him. “You said somethin’ else to me, the day I came home. What was it?”
Bobby smirked and went up to Jack. “Mercers don’t beg, ya little fairy.” He placed his hand on the nape of Jack’s neck, seeing a spark of familiarity in his blue eyes. “You don’t have to be scared, anymore,” he whispered to Jack and massaged his neck with his thumb. “Ya got us to fight off the monsters, now.”
Jack lowered his eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks. “I remember you sayin’ that so clearly! Why can’t I see you sayin’ it?” He pulled back and wiped his eyes, glaring at the wall in front of him.
“I don’t know, Jackie. I wish I did.” Bobby ruffled his hair. “You know I love ya, right?”
Jack’s head snapped to him and he forced a smile. Bobby was taken back to the day of the funeral and pulled back, heading for the door. When Jack didn’t call for him, he left and went back home. It didn’t hurt any less, but he did check his knuckles. They were a little bruised, but he’d done worse to them. He placed a pack of frozen peas on them as he stared into the dining room, wondering what he was going to do about Jack.
He grew frustrated when he realized there really wasn’t anything he could do. He supposed he could show Jack the photographs that Ma had taken of them as they were growing up, but all that’d do would upset Jack. Bobby sighed and threw the peas back into the freezer, glaring at the counter. Why would his mind single out one person to forget, but remember everything he said? He would never understand how the mind worked and it seemed that the doctors weren’t too sure about it, either.
Bobby lowered his eyes, realizing just how much it stung that Jack didn’t remember him. He’d done everything he could think of keep Jack safe while he was growing up with them. He even taught him how to defend himself against the bullies of the school. Bobby would be damned if someone took out a Mercer. He also remembered the way he’d run off when Jack—
Shaking his head violently, Bobby sat down and refused to think about it. He still couldn’t believe that he’d just leaned forward and kissed his baby brother. He hadn’t even thought about it. He was so used to kissing the cuts, scrapes and bruises of his brothers that it became second nature, especially since Ma had to do it so often with him. He sighed softly, forgetting about that day. He needed to focus on a way to get Jack to remember him that didn’t involve just showing up there, every day and hoping for the best.
The strongest demon in Hell is called Hope, Ma had said once and Bobby couldn’t agree more.
oOo
He remembered when the nightmares seemed to be physical, as he would fall out of his bed, too scared and dazed to move. Once he realized what had happened, Jack would slowly get to his feet and look around the room that had slowly become familiar to him over the last few months. That particular nightmare had been one that he’d never experienced before, but that wasn’t what had him wincing in pain. He managed to sprain his left wrist from the fall.
Unsure of what to do, Jack remembered that he didn’t tell anyone about it, figuring they wouldn’t believe him. He had worn long sleeved shirts and jackets to hide the swelling and slight bruising, refusing to meet anyone’s eye as they questioned him about his attire. He figured that the following night they would have steak and salad for dinner. Even in the Mercer home he couldn’t catch a break when he just wanted to nurse an injury. He had stared down at his plate, the hunger unbearable.
Bobby had stared at him as he picked at the salad, asking if he was a vegetarian as he ate the salad. Jack shook his head and Evelyn had told him to eat the steak to get some iron and protein. Jack just shook his head again and pushed the plate away, saying he wasn’t hungry. He gazed down the tabletop, running a finger along the grain of the wood and ignoring the way everyone looked at him. Evelyn had told everyone to go back to their meals and that Bobby and Jack could do the dishes that night.
Jack had wanted to run away after dinner, unsure how they would react to him hurting himself. He didn’t want them to think he did it on purpose to make them look bad. However, instead of doing the dishes, Bobby had sat Jack on a chair in the kitchen and crouched down in front of him. He remembered the way he tried to shy away from Bobby’s probing eyes. He had no idea how his oldest brother made him feel that way, considering he didn’t say or do anything. Evelyn had the same effect on him.
Bobby had stood and gone to the fridge. He returned with a dish towel wrapped around ice and placed it on Jack’s wrist. “How’d ya manage that, ya little fairy?”
“I didn’t mean to,” Jack had protested quietly. “I didn’t do it on purpose.”
“Whoa, calm down, all right? I didn’t say you did it on purpose. I wanna know how it happened,” Bobby said and Jack pulled back a little.
“I…fell out of bed,” he had whispered and kept his eyes down as Bobby laughed. “It felt like he grabbed me.”
Bobby fell silent instantly, regarding Jack seriously. “Nightmare?” he asked and placed a hand on Jack’s shoulder, close to his neck when the child nodded. “What did I tell ya, six month ago?”
“I have big brothers to fight off the monsters,” Jack replied robotically and tried to move away from the hand. “You can’t help when the monsters are in my head.”
“That’s the best place we can help ya, Jackie,” Bobby said softly and Jack’s head snapped up at the nickname that only Evelyn used on him. “We’re ya big brothers. We’re stronger than them. Don’t forget that.”
Jack lowered his eyes again, nodding slowly. He jumped as the cold dish towel touched his wrist and glanced up as Bobby ruffled his hair and said he’d do the dishes alone, as long as Jack kept him company. He did. He listened attentively as Bobby talked about hockey, in great length. That didn’t bother Jack, though as he was starting to find the gruff, Detroit-thick voice rather soothing, especially as hockey was something Bobby was clearly passionate about.
oOo
With a soft groan, Jack opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling of the hospital room. His head was pounding out some heavy metal tune and his mouth was dry as dust. He tried to sit up and hissed as his shoulder protested the movement. He really wished that would heal, as it was a huge inconvenience. He glanced over at the chair that was beside his bed, smiling as he saw Jeremiah in it. Though, he was curious as to why his brother was in the room. It wasn’t like he was still in the coma.
With a shake of his head, Jack reached for the cup of water and frowned as it moved back a couple of inches. Shaking his head and figuring he was seeing things, he moved forward and reached for it again. Once again, it moved out of his reach and fell to the floor. The water spilled out and splashed onto Jeremiah’s shoes, though he was still oblivious to it. He was asleep and Jack was surprised the noise didn’t wake him.
His eyes were drawn to a deep shadow by the door, which seemed to move. Jack blinked and tilted his head slightly. His eyes widened as the shadow stepped forward and took on the shape of his father. His mouth opened to scream, but no sound came out. His voice refused to work as his ankle was grabbed and he was yanked down the bed. His eyes filled with involuntary tears as he saw the sadistic smirk on his father’s face and the words that said he would live with him again, forever and ever.
Jack finally found his voice and screamed. He screamed the one name that seemed to bring him any comfort, especially as he felt hands on his shoulders, which he thrashed away from, continuing to scream for Bobby. He continued to scream for the brother he didn’t remember, but the one he knew would always be by his side if he needed anything.
The hands were back on his shoulder, shaking him. All he saw was his father’s taunting smirk, telling him that Bobby wasn’t there to save him, just as he hadn’t been there to protect him in the past. Jack refused to listen to his father’s words. He knew that Bobby would be there for him, simply because he was stronger than the nightmares. All of his brothers were stronger. So why was he still screaming for Bobby to save him? Why wasn’t he there?
“Open ya fuckin’ eyes, you little fairy,” Bobby ordered and Jack blinked, looking around the room.
Two nurses were standing behind Bobby, their faces filled with worry and Bobby was shaking his head, as though he couldn’t believe what just happened. Jack searched the corners and shadows, waiting for his father to step out and rip it away from him. However, Bobby grabbed his jaw and forced him to maintain eye contact, as though to prove he was real and that whatever just happened wouldn’t happen again.
“You focus on me, Jackie. Don’t think ’bout nothin’ else. You focus on me,” Bobby said and Jack nodded slowly, staring into the eyes of his oldest brother. He found that the stern gleam was relaxing him. “Nightmare?”
Again, Jack nodded slowly, trying to recall the memory he knew was just off to the side in his mind. Bobby had said something similar to him at one stage. He’d just dreamed of it and it was gone. He was growing annoyed with that and pulled his jaw free from Bobby’s strong grip. Bobby sighed softly and collapsed in the chair, rubbing his eyes with a hand, while one of the nurses left the room and the other made sure that Jack was fine with an unknown person in the room, which earned her a glare from Bobby.
“He’s my brother,” Jack snapped and glared at the nurse at well. The nurse raised an eyebrow, but checked his vitals, noting that his heartrate was returning to normal and left the room. “How long you been here for?”
“They called me at home ten minutes ago, sayin’ they couldn’t get ya to wake up from a night terror,” Bobby explained and Jack tilted his head. “It’s like half-two in the mornin’, man.”
Jack flinched and ran his left hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, man. I didn’t think they’d call you in for a night terror,” he murmured and closed his eyes, feeling like hell for waking Bobby up and because he didn’t feel as though he slept.
“They probably wouldn’t’ve, if you hadn’t been screamin’ my name, as though I was the one that was torturin’ ya, somehow.” Bobby tilted his head back for a moment, inhaling deeply. He leveled his head and gazed at Jack with soft eyes. “Did you wanna talk ’bout it?”
“We’re here for ya, Jackie. If you ever need to talk about them, don’t be scared. Okay?” He could hear Bobby’s voice so clearly saying those words, but for the life of him, he couldn’t think of when it happened. He couldn’t see Bobby’s face or where they were when they were said. He lowered his eyes, trying to bring the memory forward so he could remember something about his oldest brother, aside from how gorgeous he looked when his hair was messed up from sleep and the fact that his jeans were barely done up.
With a frown, Jack looked at his left wrist. He could remember not eating dinner, because he had sprained it. He knew that someone had asked him if he was a vegetarian and he assumed it was Angel or Jeremiah, as their mouths moved in time with the words, but it was Bobby’s voice that came out. He did the dishes with Jeremiah that night and he had placed the dish towel of ice on his wrist.
“There a problem with ya hand?”
Jack blinked and looked at Bobby, feeling his body react to the gentle gaze on him. He quickly looked down at the blanket, fighting off the heat that was pooling in his groin. “Just remembering the time I sprained my wrist when I fell out of my bed.”
Bobby laughed and Jack tried not to flinch at the sound. “Fuck, I forgot about that,” he said as he calmed down and grinned at Jack. “Shit, you even have the same look on ya face as ya did that night.”
Jack’s eyes snapped to Bobby, confusion settling on his face. He saw the mirth disappear from Bobby’s eyes as he realized that Jack didn’t remember it was him in the kitchen with him that night. “I thought it was Jerry with me, doing the dishes.”
Bobby swallowed and set his jaw, settling back in the chair. “It doesn’t matter, ya little fairy. Just get some sleep, so I can as well.”
“I’m sorry,” Jack whispered and tugged at the blanket covering his legs. “I…” He trailed off, unsure of what to say to make his brother feel better about himself.
“It doesn’t matter, Cracker Jack.” Bobby tried to sound unaffected by the situation, but Jack picked up that he was hurt. He wasn’t as good as he thought he was when it came to hiding his emotions. “Get some sleep. I’ll keep the nightmares away.”
Jack watched as Bobby rested his temple on his knuckles, closing his eyes. He settled down on the bed and kept his head facing Bobby, scared that if he looked away his brother would disappear. He wondered if he had ever run to Bobby for his protection, but he didn’t want to ask. It was clear his brother was dead tired, but he’d shown up to protect Jack, even though he technically didn’t have to.
With a smile, Jack closed his eyes and hoped that tomorrow would be a better day, despite the one thought that kept running through his mind. Who are you, Bobby Mercer? He doubted he’d ever get an answer for that.
I didn't plan on this bein' a multi-chapter story, so the chapter might take some time before they're posted. If ya enjoyed it, be sure to leave a review if ya please.
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Heaven in His Eyes