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Forbidden Longing	By : PyramidHead316 Category: Star Wars (All) > General Views: 4286 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: George Lucas owned Star Wars, which is now owned by Disney. This is merely a work of fan fiction. We make no profit off of this fic.

Chapter List
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Chapter 2: Shocking Revelations
The Council debriefing was mostly cut and dry when they returned to Coruscant that evening. The Council praised Obi-Wan and mostly ignored Anakin, which was nothing unusual. Anakin’s ways of doing things were always maverick-like and against the grain, which was why he was usually deemed reckless and unpredictable. Anakin wasn’t stupid and he knew the Council didn’t trust him. He could especially sense strong dislike and distrust coming from Master Windu, Master Jill, and Master Gallia. But he wasn’t about to let the Council bring his spirits down tonight. It had been three long months since he’d seen his angel, and he was finally going home to her.
Just shortly after the war began, due to the sizeable losses on Geonosis, the Jedi Council had decided to house many of their Knights outside the temple. To Anakin, it was the smartest thing they had ever done. All the Jedi in one place just made it too easy to attack them in large numbers. In fact, it had been Obi-Wan’s idea in the first place. He had convinced the Masters with no small amount of effort to spread them out for a greater defense. They agreed with him, as they usually did and implemented the idea immediately. Obi-Wan had his own and Anakin did also, though he had spent a total of maybe three hours in that apartment. He would go in the general direction of his building to make it appear that it was his real destination. Then, he would carefully maneuver his way to 500 Republica and to his real home with Padme. Had Anakin ever suggested the idea of spreading them out, the Council would have dismissed the idea without a second thought. But coming from Obi-Wan, the idea held much more weight and consideration. Obi-Wan’s voice broke Anakin’s concentration.
“Anakin, would you care to join me at Dex’s for a drink?” Obi-Wan asked.
Anakin was hesitant. Really, all he wanted to do was get home to Padme. However, he didn’t want it to seem like he had somewhere to be. Obi-Wan being suspicious of him was the last thing he needed.
“Sure, Master,” he answered. They took Anakin’s speeder, as Obi-Wan was usually the heavier drinker between the two of them. His Master preferred strong drinks, preferably Corellian whiskey or Andarian brandy. Anakin had never developed much of a taste for the strong drinks that his Master liked. He figured that Padme had spoiled him with the fine Nabooan red wine they would often share together when he was home.
~*~
At Dex’s, Obi-Wan ordered Corellian whiskey and Anakin stuck to jawa juice. After his Master tipped several back, Anakin decided that it time to take him home. Once they arrived home, Anakin insisted on helping Obi-Wan inside, seeing as he thought his Master was drunk. However, Obi-Wan was still plenty sober and just beginning to feel a buzz. Obi-Wan Kenobi’s ability to hold his liquor was legendary, but Anakin always liked to play it safe. As Anakin helped Obi-Wan out of the speeder, Obi-Wan was about to protest and tell Anakin that he was perfectly sober. But when Anakin’s arm went around his shoulders, the words left him. He decided that he would play along and let Anakin help him.
Obi-Wan glanced over at his former Padawan and studied his profile for a moment, noticing how full and enticing his lips were. How many people in the galaxy fantasized about kissing that exquisite mouth? And now Obi-Wan was among them. But were his feelings unrequited? Anakin gave no indication of sharing the issue his Master was struggling with. In fact, Obi-Wan had little idea as to what type of person Anakin found attractive, save for the childish infatuation he possibly had for Senator Amidala.
Under normal circumstances that might have sufficed as proof Anakin was not interested in males. But Obi-Wan was now aware of how suddenly and unexpectedly attraction could strike. How was he to know whether Anakin harbored any feelings for him, unless he found some way to read Anakin’s thoughts? And there was only one sure way to test that.
“Anakin?”
“What?”
Before either of them knew what was happening, Obi-Wan’s lips were on Anakin’s. Anakin’s lips were soft and smooth under Obi-Wan’s...and Force, he tasted so good. It ended all too quickly though for Obi-Wan, as Anakin pushed him away.
“Master, what are you doing?” Anakin exclaimed. Obi-Wan winced as he saw his Padawan wipe his mouth with the back of his gloved hand.
Obi-Wan had no answer to that. He made as if to stumble, hoping to draw away Anakin’s attention from his faux-pas. The gamble worked. Anakin caught him before he sank to his knees, shaking his head at his former Master’s apparent disorientation.
“You’re drunk, Master,” Anakin told him. Obi-Wan hid his disappointment and allowed himself to led to the couch. Nothing…he thought despondently. No reluctance that turned into eager willingness, no frenzied rush that led Anakin to kiss him back; only a startled demand of what in the Force he thought he was doing. Anakin didn’t care. He simply thought his Master was intoxicated and acting as such.
Obi-Wan should have expected this. He should have been prepared for a negative response. Indeed, he should have wanted it, so that he could focus on driving away this disturbing attraction to his old Padawan. And yet, he felt strangely disheartened by Anakin’s rejection.
“I need to go Master, will you be okay?” Anakin asked. Obi-Wan wanted to scream no, but instead he nodded.
“Of course Anakin, I’ll be fine,” Obi-Wan replied. Anakin nodded and quickly left. Obi-Wan wondered where he could be off to in such a hurry. Anakin thought that he was drunk, but what would he have done if he knew Obi-Wan was sober and knew exactly what he had done? Not being able to shake his curiosity about his former Padawan’s whereabouts, Obi-Wan quickly headed out to his speeder.
~*~
He masked his presence in the Force so well that not even Master Yoda would have been able to sense him following. He followed Anakin for several blocks over the city until they reached the exclusive residential area known as 500 Republica. And when he saw Anakin’s speeder fly up to the veranda of a certain Naboo senator’s apartment, Obi-Wan felt his stomach lurch. In the back of his mind, he had suspected this. But suspecting was it was one thing. Seeing Anakin fly to see Senator Amidala behind his back was something completely different, and Obi-Wan already feared the worst.
Still, he had to be sure and see for himself before he jumped to any conclusions. He parked his speeder out of sight and stepped out onto the ledge of the building. He made his way around to Amidala’s veranda, making sure he carefully masked himself in the Force where he would watch and listen...
~*~
Padme gasped, as she saw Anakin’s speeder land. A bright smile broke out on her face, as she dropped the data pad she was reading and rushed out to greet her husband.
“Ani!” she cried in excitement. Anakin smiled brightly, as he caught her in his arms and spun her around. Their lips locked in a passionate kiss and Anakin finally set her back on her feet.
Obi-Wan’s locked his shields down tight, despite the churning and storming emotions inside him. He wanted to believe that they were only together for physical reasons...but in the back of his mind knew different. And as he continued to spy on them, he would find out their relationship was far deeper than physical attraction.
“I missed you so much. There were whispers...that you’d been killed...” Padme trailed off, as Anakin kissed her again.
“I’m all right angel, I’m all right. I have leave for two months Padme, two months! The war has slackened thanks to our latest victory,” Anakin said happily.
“Two months? Oh Ani, how wonderful,” she replied, as she hugged him tightly.
“How I missed you my love. Every night, I would think of you and you kept me going out there. I lived to come back to you,” Anakin told her, as they stepped inside together. Obi-Wan felt the need to wretch, as he watched them hold each other and kiss each other with passion for what seemed like forever. Anakin’s lips traveled down her neck and her eyes were lidded with desire, as he sent soft chills of delight down her spine.
Obi-Wan was beyond angry, so what possessed him to creep around outside the bedroom window where Anakin had carried Padme to, he would never know. Lucky for him, the window was open, as the night air was refreshingly nice, albeit artificial on Coruscant this time of year. His eyes blazed in anger at the words he heard his former Padawan utter next.
“I love you Padme...so much,” Anakin said, as he continued to passionately kiss her, while undressing her.
“I...I love you too Ani,” she moaned, as his hands slid over her naked body in exploration. Locked in a passionate embrace, they tumbled to the bed, kissing, caressing, and stroking each other. Anakin’s head dipped down and took one of her pert nipples in his mouth, eliciting a cry of ecstasy from her. Padme arched her back, as he suckled her breasts, causing her to writhe underneath him.
“I...I need you Ani!” Padme cried. Anakin moved up to capture her lips in a hard kiss, as he slid inside her. His gentle rhythm quickly picked up in intensity, until they were finally rocking together in a sensual, rapid pace. Padme emitted soft cries of passion as Anakin thrust deep inside her over and over again.
“Ani...oooh Ani!” she panted, as he made love to her.
“Angel...sweet angel...” he moaned, as he held her trembling form in his arms. Her cries became more desperate, as she finally came. Her climax triggered his own and he spilled inside her. He collapsed beside her, after his release finished and he pulled her tightly into his arms. She snuggled against him, their slick skin gliding together. Entwined in each other’s arms, they bathed in the afterglow of their lovemaking.
Outside their bedroom window, Obi-Wan was ablaze at the whole revolting scenario. He watched with smoldering eyes as their ‘activities’ played out before his sight, and now he was at a loss on what to do. This was more than infatuation, more than a purely physical coupling. This was attachment and it made him sick to his stomach. And much to his own shock, only part of that disgust was centered solely on Anakin breaking the code and lying to his face about it.
Anger and jealousy were not emotions that Obi-Wan was used to feeling, so now that they were burning inside him, he was unsure as to what to do with them. He slowly and quietly made his way back to his speeder and headed for his apartment...
~*~
It wasn’t supposed to go this way, Obi-Wan reflected miserably. He was sitting alone in the living room of his small apartment. The lights were off, but he felt no desire to go to bed. There was too much running through his mind for him to fall asleep now.
How did this happen? He had everything planned out. All the meditation he had done on the way back to Coruscant hadn’t done him much good. On the contrary, it had left him more confused than before. The Force seemed reluctant to yield any answers to his dilemma. Instead he ended up with another question to ponder: What if Anakin felt the same? Obi-Wan was the last person anyone would expect to form an attraction to another Jedi, and he knew his Padawan was a far more passionate person than he was. Wasn’t it possible he too was in the same situation? If he wasn’t, wouldn’t it be best to know for sure one way or another before Obi-Wan tried to clamp down on these feelings for Anakin?
And so, Obi-Wan decided to find out one way or another. The code was strict on emotional attachment, but there was nothing in the rules that said Jedi had to be celibate. If he and Anakin did share a mutual attraction to each other, there was nothing standing in the way of them acting on that attraction, save for Obi-Wan’s own conscience. As Luminara Unduli was fond of saying, the rules did leave room for flexibility. So long as they kept it purely physical, the Council would do nothing to call them on it. There wasn’t even a need for them to know.
Thus Obi-Wan decided to forego seeking counsel from another Jedi in favor of a drink with Anakin. He wasn’t sure how he would probe into Anakin’s feelings, but he resolved to solve that issue on the way. He was sure something would come to him and it did in the form of that all-too-brief kiss. But now Obi-Wan realized he wasn’t prepared at all for the possibility of Anakin rejecting him. Because deep inside, the idea of Anakin returning his affections excited him as soon as it occurred to him. He couldn’t deny it – there was a part of him that savored the idea of throwing caution to the wind and engaging in a fling with his former Padawan.
Except…most likely that idea had never once occurred to Anakin himself, and now Obi-Wan was left totally unprepared for the sting of that rejection.
And he sure as hell wasn’t prepared for what happened afterwards.
He couldn’t get the images out of his mind. His own Padawan locked in a passionate embrace with Amidala, touching each other, undressing each other and ‘making love’ to each other on her bed. It made him sick. Rarely had Obi-Wan felt so nauseated in response to seeing two people together before, and that nausea was mixed with rage. Bad enough Anakin was disgusted by his affections. But now this? How dare they? He thought with no small amount of outrage. How dare they do this behind my back?!
Anakin was supposed to be a Jedi! And he was a Jedi because Obi-Wan had stood up for him to the Council when no one else would. He had poured countless hours of training into this boy. He had devoted his entire life to training him as a Jedi the way his late Master wanted because he believed in the boy’s potential for greatness. And this was the way Anakin thanked him – by pursuing some woman behind his back? A politician, no less! And Padme? What the hell was she thinking by allowing this? She had to realize that Anakin was a Jedi and Jedi weren’t allowed to form attachments for a reason. And yet, here she was happily engaged in a relationship with him. It wouldn’t be so bad if they were just in it for the physical aspect, but Obi-Wan clearly heard them say it wasn’t so. They loved each other.
He was enraged. And though he knew Jedi were supposed to indulge such dark emotions, he saw no point in trying to will away that anger. What good would it do? It wouldn’t change the fact that his Padawan and that senator were involved in an illicit relationship, and it wouldn’t change the fact that thirteen years of training Anakin had just gone down entirely down the drain. Obi-Wan would have to report his Padawan’s transgression to the Council, and when he did, it would mean the end of Anakin’s career as a Jedi. All because of Amidala and Anakin’s own stupidity in letting himself fall for someone Obi-Wan warned him about time and time again.
She seduced him away from me!
Obi-Wan was briefly startled by the thought. Seduced him? He had no claim on Anakin besides their friendship. Yet, he had to admit that was what it felt like. Anakin was fine until Padme came along. Yes, he thought about her too often for Obi-Wan’s liking, but he never went to the extent of pursuing her before. Now he had and it would cost Obi-Wan a man he’d considered a truly great friend, almost like the younger brother he never had.
He wasn’t wrong, Obi-Wan realized. He and Anakin may not have been lovers, but Padme was still taking Anakin away from him.
Obi-Wan was at a loss on what to do. No amount of meditation was going to help with this and sleep was clearly not going to come easily tonight. He looked towards the bedroom. Briefly his thoughts shifted towards the bottle of expensive Corellian brandy he kept in a cabinet there. It had been a gift from Bail Organa, who insisted Obi-Wan take it despite the Jedi mandate on accepting presents or rewards. Obi-Wan had been saving it for some potential celebration, rare as those were in his life.
He dismissed the idea. Getting drunk wasn’t going to solve anything. In fact, it might only make things worse. Emotional turbulence and alcohol were a bad combination, especially if the bearer of that turbulence possessed a lightsaber.
“Blast it!” Obi-Wan smashed his hand against the sofa. He couldn’t sleep and he couldn’t stop thinking about what happened. That left only one option.
Obi-Wan stood up from the couch and went into his bedroom. Moments later he emerged with the key to what was supposed to be Anakin’s home.
He was going to Anakin’s apartment. He would stay the night there and try to get some sleep. And when his Padawan returned, they were going to have a long talk, just the two of them.
A very long talk indeed.
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Forbidden Longing