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More Than Darkness	By : SaMe Category: M through R > Once Upon A Time In Mexico Views: 4591 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the movie that this fanfiction is written for, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-1
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 6-6
- 7-7
- 8-8
- 9-9
- 10-10
- 11-11
- 12-12
- 13-13
- 14-14
- 15-15
- 16-16
- 17-17
- 18-18
- 19-19
- 20-20
- 21-21
- 22-22
- 23-23
- 24-24
- 25-25
- 26-26
- 27-27
- 28-28
- 29-29
- 30-30
- 31-31
- 32-32
- 33-33
- 34-34
- 35-35
- 36-36
- 37-37
- 38-38
- 39-39
- 40-40
- 41-41
- 42-42
- 43-43
- 44-44
- 45-45
- 46-46
- 47-47
- 48-48
- 49-49
- 50-50
- 51-51
- 52-52
- 53-53
- 54-54
- 55-55
- 56-56
- 57-57
- 58-58
- 59-59
- 60-60
- 61-61
- 62-62
- 63-63
- 64-64
- 65-65
- 66-66
- 67-67
- 68-68
- 69-69
- 70-70
- 71-71
- 72-72
- 73-73
- 74-74
- 75-75
- 76-76
- 77-77
- 78-78
- 79-79
- 80-80
- 81-81
- 82-82
- 83-83
- 84-84
- 85-85
- 86-86
- 87-87
- 88-88
- 89-89
- 14
- 15
- 16
This is a crossover smutty story featuring the character of
Tess/Salida ie Tess' Voice in Neon Dasies' OUATIM fics on ff.net, More Than
Eyes Alone Can See, and More Than Life,
and Sands/Jeffrey from Merrie's OUATIM fic on ff.net, Darkness Rising. This story
will make some sense, probably, if you read it without having read either of
our stories, but it'll make a hell of a lot more if you just read them. They're
all worth reading, we promise. Anyway, on with the show.
Rated for what has happened, and what might happen. We�re really not quite sure ourselves. On with the story.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

�What time is it
you bastard?� Jeffrey asked as Sands rode a cab silently back to their hotel.
�It�s a little
after ten, and fuck you too buddy,� the cab driver said with a sneer.
Sands rolled his
eyes. �At least whisper if you�re going
to talk to me out loud, will you?� he whispered to him.
Jeffrey scowled. �Ten o�clock,
well that�s just fucking perfect you bastard,� he sneered. �I hope you had your fucking fun because if
you think I�m letting you do this again tomorrow you�ve got another fucking
thing coming.�
�Oh fuck you. I�m going home now, aren�t I? You�ll get to see your precious vixen all you
fucking want.�
�Don�t fucking give
me that bullshit. You knew bet could have called.
�Sunrise?
You still awake?� Sands called out
softly after peeking his head into the open door of her and Jeffrey�s bedroom.
�Vixen?� Jeffrey
asked in a similarly hesitant voice, moving into the bedroom. He saw Salida sitting there quietly and frowned.
�Oh. You�re still awake. I told you she�d still be fucking awake,� he
muttered under his breath to Sands.
�Look, I�m sorry I�m
home late, alright? But we�re here now.�
He waited for Salida to respond, but she
wasn�t talking. �Sunrise?
Say something?�
�How about you�re a
fucking inconsiderate bastard?� Salida
didn�t look away from the TV, but her fingers started drumming on her crossed
arms.
Sands winced. �Ok, I probably deserved that, fine. Yes, I�m inconsiderate. I could have called and I didn�t. I�m sorry you�re upset, but I�m not going to
regret the day I had today. A day that,
in all fairness to Jeffrey and I, included coming home to see you around lunch
time. You weren�t here. But fine, I should have fucking called or something,
alright? I�m sorry,� he said with a
shrug.
Salida appreciated
the apology, but she wasn�t done playing yet.
So for the moment, she ignored that he�d said anything. �For all I knew, you were both arrested. In the hospital. Dead.�
She let her voice break on the last word, and threw herself down on the
bed, sobbing hysterically. This is fun, she thought as she hugged
the pillow closer to her face.
�Oh fuck, sunrise,
don�t cry,� Sands said with a bit of begging in his voice. �And I suppose you want me to deal with this?� he addressed Jeffrey, gesturing
to the sobbing Salida. Jeffrey was
sullenly silent. �Great, now you�re both fucking pissed at me. As per usual, I suppose,� Sands said, rubbing
a hand across his face wearily. I don�t fucking have the energy to deal with
this right now. He seriously
considered just getting up and going to bed, but that would create more
problems than it would solve, so he stayed. �We�re not in the hospital, arrested, or dead,
sunrise. As a matter of fact, I didn�t
even do anything today that could get me arrested,� he said, somewhat surprised
at himself. �Now granted, that�s not
your point, but I felt I should bring it up.� He moved to sit at the foot of the bed, not
wanting to look at her as she cried, but unable to look away either. �Also, if I had been arrested, I would have
called you. I don�t know � well I didn�t know � anyone else in this
godforsaken city.� As soon as the words
were out of his mouth, he cursed to himself. He hadn�t really wanted them to know about
Aida. Fuck.
Immediately Salida
stopped her sobbing and sat bolt upright in the bed. Sands jumped back, afraid she was going to
attack him, but she was simply staring at him, head cocked to one side.
Salida watched him
watch her uncertainly for some time before asking impatiently, �So? Where you going to give me more than
that? I assume you met a girl, and if
you didn�t do anything worth getting arrested, that must mean that she�s still
alive. What�s she like? Does she know about your �secret double life�? How does she feel about it if she does?� As she spoke, a wicked grin grew on her face,
and as the dismay spread across Sands� own face, she started laughing and
flopped down on the mattress. �Oh, you
should have seen your face, cowboy.�
�Very funny,
sunrise. See me laughing,� Sands said,
slumping to the ground and leaning against the side of the bed.
�You are laughing,
Sands,� Salida pointed out, still giggling.
�That�s not me,
that�s fucking Jeffrey. He thinks you�re
a fucking riot. I don�t, however.� He turned his head to the side slowly and
addressed Salida. �Are you going to
leave me be if I said that I wasn�t going to tell you about her?�
�No,� Salida said
without hesitation.
�And now I�m fucking
curious too,� Jeffrey added, leaning his head against the bed. �If I�m going to fucking come home as fucking
exhausted as I feel right now, the least you could do is tell me the name of
the girl that you, and consequently me, are fucking.�
�Sorry, lover. You�re not fucking her any more than Sands is
fucking me.�
Jeffrey frowned a
bit at the notion of Sands fucking his wife, but held his tongue, while Sands
said, �Her name is Aida, alright? I met
her while coming out of the hotel after we stopped by to see you, sunrise. Actually, I nearly ran her over,� he said
with a short laugh.
�And?� Salida was just like any other woman and
needed details. �What does she look
like? What did you spend the day doing? Is she nice?
Do you like her, or like like
her?� Why did she feel as if she should
be giving a manicure or something?
�She�s even smaller
than you, she�s got red hair, and she�s still alive. And that�s all you�re getting out of me. So you can save your interrogation for some
other time, sunrise,� Sands said, his eyes closed as he leaned his head against
the edge of the bed.
�Wanna bet?� There was no reply. �Sands?�
Salida moved until she could look over the edge of the bed. �Did you fall asleep on me, Sands?� Still no answer. Fine. Switching her attention to her husband,
Salida asked, �Jeffrey?� Again, no
answer from the sleeping body on the floor.
This is just perfect. I hope that redhead appreciates what she got
tonight, because I�m sure as hell not getting any. Giving it one last try, she laid her hand on
Jeffrey�s shoulder. �Lover? If you don�t wake up, I�m going to go to
sleep and let you get stiff and sore there on the floor.� But her threat had no effect.
Shaking her head,
Salida got up and went to the wardrobe, getting out a spare blanket and a spare
pillow. She brought them back to the
bed, placed the pillow on the floor, then managed to lower her husband to lie
on it. She look off his shoes and socks,
then covered him with the blanket. She
kissed his temple and whispered, �Sleep well, lover,� then got back into bed
herself. There was no way she was
sleeping on the floor when the bed was available.

******************************

�Fuck,� Jeffrey muttered sleepily, opening his eyes a number
of hours later. Something wasn�t right.
. . . �What the fuck? Where the fuck am I?� he muttered, sitting up
suddenly. That turned out to be a
mistake however, and he sank back down onto the pillow with a wince. an>Han>His entire back and neck was stiff and
painful. �Sands, you fucking bastard. You fell asleep, didn�t you?� Sands seemed to be still sleeping, however,
for he gave no answer. �Ok, let�s
fucking try this again,� he said, steeling himself. He climbed quickly to his feet before he could
chicken out, gritting his teeth the entire time. Once he had fully straightened his back he
felt a little better, but it was still something like having hot pokers shoved
through your spine. �Oh, you fucker, I
didn�t even get my hour,� Jeffrey moaned, looking down at Salida�s sleeping
body upon the bed. �Well, we�re going to
change that. But first. . . .�
He removed the rest
of Sands� clothing slowly and left them in a rumpled pile and shuffled his way
to the bathroom like Frankenstein�s monster with his straight-backed walk. He reached the shower an indeterminate number
of minutes later and stepped into the stall, turning the water on to nearly
scalding and sighing as it hit his sore body. Vixen�ll
appreciate this as well. I doubt she
wants me smelling like some fucking other woman. He and Sands had a lot to discuss today; that
was just one part. He didn�t necessarily
care to know who Sands fucked, but he could tell in Sands� voice that this girl
� whatever her name was � was different. That and
she�s not dead, he said so himself. Remember that. Jeffrey thought on this fact for a short while
longer as he finished his shower. He put
all thoughts of Sands and his new girl out his mind as he dried himself off and
toweled off his hair, making his way back into the bedroom.
Salida was woken up
by the scent of a freshly washed body and a pair of arms wrapping around her
body while a soft kiss was pressed on her neck.
She murmured and snuggled back against the warm body behind her, but struggled
not to wake up. This was too nice a
feeling to spoil it by waking up right away.
Jeffrey smiled and
shook his head at Salida�s unwillingness to wake up. He�d let her sleep for a little while longer,
but not . . . unmolested. He reached
around her back and pulled her close to his chest, fondling her left breast
slowly underneath her t-shirt. While he
did that, he continued kissing her neck as slowly and as gently as he could
manage. He didn�t want her waking up . .
. yet.
�Jeffrey. . .�
Salida murmured her husband�s name softly, arching against him before trying to
roll onto her back. He didn�t let her,
slipping an arm around her waist to pull her back against him. She squirmed for a moment, but eventually
relaxed, a small smile working its way onto her face as he continued waking
her.
Smirking, Jeffrey
intensified his movements slightly, pinching at Salida�s nipple and biting and
sucking on her ear. �Vixen,� he
whispered softly. an>Han>He suddenly didn�t
feel like being patient anymore and wanted her to wake up.
�What time is it?� she asked groggily. Of course, that didn�t stop her body from
melting against him or her hand from slipping down to rest over the one at her
waist.
Jeffrey lifted his
head up to look at the clock. �Still
early. I guess I just couldn�t sleep on
the fucking floor anymore.� He leaned
over and placed a few soft kisses on her neck. �Good morning, vixen.�
�Sorry about that,�
she breathed. �But you�re too big for me
to move.� She tried to turn towards him,
but he wouldn�t let her. �Lover . . .�
she whined softly.
�Don�t worry about
it. I�m alright. What if I want to just hold you here for
awhile? What would you say to that? I didn�t get to fucking see you hardly at
all, vixen,� he muttered into her neck.
�You�re not �just
holding� me,� she pointed out, but she didn�t try turning around again. �I missed you,� she murmured. �But I did get some stuff actually done
yesterday. It�s amazing what one can
accomplish when one�s amazingly sexy husband isn�t around to distract one.�
�Touch�. I missed you too,� he admitted slowly. �And what fun would not having your amazingly
sexy husband around be, vixen? What kind
of stuff did you get done? Did you find
us all a place to live yet?� he asked, burying his nose in her hair.
�Yeah, I did. It�s not an apartment, but I decided that
would be better anyway. I went ahead and
signed the lease papers. You don�t mind,
do you?� This was very nice; lying in
bed, still half-asleep, her husband�s arms around her, talking about mundane
domestic things.
�No, I don�t mind,
vixen. We needed somewhere else to
live. I�m sure wherever you picked is
fine. Especially considering all the
fucking looking around you made us do.
At least, you better fucking have after all that. You�re a hard taskmaster, vixen,� Jeffrey
said with an utterly blank face, but Salida could hear the smile in his
voice.
�Mmm. Remind S�� she stopped herself before saying
his name, afraid of waking him. �� your
friend of that when I hit him up for money later today. Either he lets me buy furniture myself, or I
drag him around to fifty different department stores.�
�My friend,�
Jeffrey snorted. �Does this
mean I can let go now? You can roll over
now if I want now too,� Jeffrey said with a wink.
Kissing him
passionately, she pulled away several moments later to whisper, �Just tell me
what you want, lover, and I�ll do it.�
�Sit up on the bed,�
he instructed. When she did, he went on.
�Lift up your arms.� When she did, he pulled her shirt up and over
her head. �Much better,� he sighed,
leaning over to kiss a bare shoulder, her collarbone, and the tops of her
breasts before he pulled away and unhooked and removed her bra, throwing it
across the room. an>�an>�Alright, you can lie
back down now, vixen,� he said with a small smile as she did as he asked. With her continued assistance he was able to
remove her shorts and panties until she lay before him completely naked and
beautiful. �You know, as much as I like
having you cater to my every whim and will, I�ll admit I kind of miss your . .
. playfulness vixen,� he said with a smile, somewhat surprised at himself.
�I aim to please,�
she whispered, before launching herself off the bed and into his arms, knocking
him flat on his back as her lips attacked his.
She growled playfully, batting at his hands as he tried to touch her. If he wanted playful, she was more than happy
to give it to him. Let him try to subdue
her . . . they�d both enjoy it.
�That�s my vixen,�
he murmured in-between kisses. In all
honesty he preferred a woman who would fight back � up to a point � than
subservient little misses, but he was rather irritated that she wasn�t letting
him touch her, especially after all he had just done for her, so he fought. He didn�t mind that she was taking charge
though . . . for now. Actually, the �for
now� took a lot less time than he intended, as he grew annoyed enough with her
stubbornness to allow him to touch her and flipped them both on the bed so that
he was back on top. �I do like your
fucking playfulness, vixen. I�m not
going to deny it,� he said, pulling away so that he could talk to her, �but
keeping me from fucking touching you is where I draw the line,� he said, slowly
running his hands over every inch of flesh he could reach. �I could never get enough of fucking touching
you, vixen, and I�m certainly not going to now,� he said, leaning down to
recapture her mouth again.
She certainly wasn�t
going to complain about having his hands traveling over her in an increasingly
frantic pace. Touches that had started
as cherishing and almost reverent were quickly turning provocative and
demanding. More than willing to give her
senses over to them, she arched up into those hands, thanking whoever was
responsible for making them so large and nimble.
After what he�d
done for her, Salida wasn�t surprised when Jeffrey took the time to make her
moan and writhe under him. It was her
punishment, and it was one she was glad both to receive and to allow him. So she gleefully parted her lips and let him
take her over, moaning into his mouth as he groped at her body, his hands
zeroing in on her breasts. She shrieked
when his devilish hands pinched the inside of her thighs hard enough to leave
bruises, nipping at him in retribution.
She was more than ready for him to finish things, but apparently he was
still enjoying punishing her too much.
Jeffrey only laughed at Salida�s nips in
return for what he was doing to her. He
didn�t allow them to stop him, however. He
was having entirely too much fun for that. And in truth, he enjoyed her little bites. He moved his hands away from her nipples and
onto her breasts themselves, still caressing quickly, but no longer arousing
quite as much. He wasn�t done having his
own fun yet. And he wouldn�t be until
either his patience ran out, which was likely, or she stopped him herself. Either way he�d get what he wanted, so he was
more than content to keep up his play for as long as he could. He slowed down his kissing even as hinds nds
sped up, turning their mouths� frenzied motions into something slow and more
than a little sensual. He moved his
mouth to her neck and shoulders, keeping up that slow pace while his hands
continued to torment her body. He
smirked when Salida moaned particularly loudly. �I love to hear you like this, vixen. Each syllable out of your mouth makes me
harder and harder. Do you feel it?� he
asked, running his length along her stomach and in-between her legs, but not
penetrating her. He could hold out a
little while longer. Well, he thought he
could, at any rate.
�Not as much as I
would if you�d just fuck me already,� she groaned. He was making her feel decidedly . . .
impatient. �Do you know how it feels,
lover? Do you know what it�s like for me
to feel my body, my mind, my very self
give way to you? I was so fucking
independent before you came along, but now I never even stand a chance. All you have to do is look at me with those
chocolate, bedroom eyes of yours, and all I can do is tease you until you throw
me on the nearest piece of furniture and slam into me until I totally lose it.� Her head was tossing on the pillows and she�d
give anything to have him inside her. �Do
. . . do you want to hear what you do to me, lover?�
�Yes,� Jeffrey
hissed, immediately wishing he hadn�t. His
will was teetering on the brink, and he was very close to giving her exactly what
she wanted. He had a feeling that
whatever she had to say to him would push him over that brink, and he wouldn�t
be able to do anything else but bury himself inside of her as far as he could
and thrust into her until they were both satisfied. �Tell me, vixen. I want to know.�
Oh god, he was
going to make her come before he even entered her. �The moment you start t-touching me, my body
surrenders. Sometimes even before
that. Sometimes all it takes is a look
and I can feel myself melting . . . growing wet . . . my body surrendering to
what I know is coming. My chest grows
tight . . . I can feel myself swelling inside my skin until every part of me is
so sensitive that your every touch sends �� she gasped as he parted her legs
widely, setting between them for the time being. he doesn�t wake up, we�ve got all the time in the world.� Looking over at the alarm clock, taking note
that it was only a quarter past six, she continued. �Please, I don�t want to lose you to him yet.� God, she�d missed him more than she�d
realized; she didn�t want to leave his arms.
Out of sight, out of mind, she
supposed, and at the moment, he was very much in her sight and mind. �Don�t leave me yet. I don�t care what we do, just don�t fall
asleep.�
�Alright, vixen,�
he said softly, willing himself out of the sleepy daze he had been falling
into. It wasn�t that he was still tired
necessarily; it�s that he was , co, content and utterly relaxed and it made him
want to fall asleep in her arms. �And
don�t worry about . . . him, yet. It�s still early, and he usually sleeps in
late. He says mornings don�t agree with
him,� he muttered into her shoulder. �Talk
to me vixen. I don�t care what you
fucking talk about, just talk to me. Tell
me what the house is like. And feel free
to smack me if I drift off,� he said with a soft chuckle. �Just, don�t expect me to move or anything. Eventually I�ll have to, I know, but not yet,�
he muttered, opening his eyes and turning his head to look at her.
She didn�t want him
to move . . . she didn�t want him to leave her.
But she knew that he was going to have to eventually � at least for
today � and that made this time alone and together in each other�s arms all the
more precious and bittersweet.
Shifting her head a
bit so it rested on Jeffrey�s shoulder, she started talking. �I like the house. It�s on a quiet little dead end, just outside
the French Quarter and within walking distance of several clubs and bars. It has a fence � much to my chagrin � but it�s
iron. The house is small, but there�s
two floors, and three bedrooms, so we get one, he gets one, and the third can be whatever we want it to be. I�ve actually got some ideas about that, but
I want to test the waters before I share them.�
She turned her head and rubbed her nose against his in reassurance,
knowing very well his stance on secrets.
�It�s a surprise, so don�t get your nose out of joint, lover.� Relaxing as she started to visualize her
subject, and as she felt Jeffrey�s eyes on her, she went on: �New paint �
inside and out � new carpeting. It�s
unfurnished � � she made a face, �� but it came with utilities, so we�ve got a
fridge, and a stove, and an oven, and a microwave, and a dishwasher, and a
washing machine, and a dryer.� She
rattled off the list with a small smile, know Jeffrey probably couldn�t care
less. �There�s a small, overgrown garden
in the back, but I�d like to fix it up.
All in all, I�m content. And I
hope to have all the furniture shopping done today. And tomorrow, when things start to resemble �normal�
again, we can. . .� she trailed off as Jeffrey tensed slightly in her
arms. �What? What is it?�
Something about her last sentence had made him uncomfortable.
�Call me fucking
pessimistic if you like vixen, but who�s to say there will be a fucking normal
again? You heard Sa-him,� Jeffrey amended quickly, keeping to her statement
about not saying his name in fear that he might take notice and wake up. �I don�t know anything about this girl he met,
and I don�t fucking like it. You think I
don�t like it when you keep secrets? Well
just think how I fucking feel when he
keeps fucking secrets,� Jeffrey said irritably. �I don�t know this girl, Aida, or whatever the
hell her name is, I don�t know why she�s still alive, and I don�t like it. She could cause problems. Fuck, she�s causing problems right now and he
only just met her.�
�You�re a fucking
pessimist,� she whispered. �And whether
she means anything or not, we�ll deal with it.
Talk to him. If she isn�t
anything more important than a distraction, do whatever you think is best, be
it letting this play out or killing her.
If it�s something more . . .� she shrugged, �then we�ll deal with that
somehow. But it�s not something I want
to think about at the moment. It�s a waste
of time and of mental resources. All you
need to know is I�ll be here whatever the outcome. I won�t let some redheaded . . . normie . . . steal this from me. From us.�
�Normie? What the hell does that mean?� asked Jeffrey.
�You know, someone
different from us. A �normal�
person. Someone who�s supposed to exist, not someone who just .
. . does . . . like we do.�
�Fine, I�m a
pessimist. I won�t talk about it any
more today,� Jeffrey promised, lifting his head up to kiss the corner of her mouth
softly before letting it fall back down upon the bed. �The house sounds fucking nice, I guess,�
Jeffrey said with a shrug. �I don�t know
about the garden, but whatever floats your fucking boat, vixen,� he said with a
smirk. �If you really want to spend all
that time out in the fucking heat � and believe me, it�ll get fucking hot here
sooner than you think � pulling weeds I�ll leave you to it. Just don�t expect me to help,� he said, his
smirk widening into a grin.
�What? You don�t want to see me outside, wearing
next to nothing, covered in sweat from the heat and humidity while all our
neighbors are at work and we have the freedom and privacy to whatever our
licentious little hearts desire? Are you
telling me that you wouldn�t want to come out and join me under those
circumstances?�
She knew him too
well. �We�ll see, vixen,� he said, not
willing to just give in and fall into the role she knew he would. Of course he would come out to see her if she
was scantily clad and sweaty; he could do nothing else. But he didn�t have to come out and say that he
would. He�d take small victories over
her in their constant playful warring, and after scoring the major hit on him
that she just had, he needed all the points he could get. �You�ll have to take me to see it soon. And that brings up another point. One of us has got to get a fucking car sooner
or later. I�m getting tired of riding in
taxis and taking the fucking trolley,� he muttered.
Salida
groaned. �There�s no way you�re getting
me to go car shopping. You and Sands can
handle that one.� Then she realized how
unlikely it was that they�d be able to do any such thing without arguing enough
to scare scores of people. �Fine. I take it back. I�ll
go car shopping with Sands, and hopefully that will be enough of a compromise
on both parties. There�s no way I�m
going to have to spring you from jail because some car salesman thought you
were drunk.�
Jeffrey laughed at
that, causing both of their bodies to shake. �Touch�,� he said with a laugh. �Fine, you two can go car shopping. I�ll keep my comments down to polite whispers,�
he said with a smirk. �But there will be
comments on what he picks out, otherwise I can tell you exactly what he�ll
want; it�ll be fast, expensive, and black,� he said with a roll of his eyes. �He can be so fucking predictable sometimes. Now, granted the fact that we might share the
same body might have something to do with why I know him so well, but I think
he really is that fucking predictable.�
�You�re more than
willing to think the worst of him, though,� she pointed out. �People change. Perhaps not always radically, but enough to
still surprise you sometimes. Look at
you.� She brushed a lock of hair out of
his face. �Once a fucking sexy bachelor
who killed every woman that fell into his bed, and now, a fucking sexy married
man. A small change because you still
enjoy killing people, but enough of one that you threw your alter ego for a
loop.�
Jeffrey didn�t know
what to say to that. She was right. Who was he to say that Sands couldn�t change? �Fine, you have a fucking point. If I can change then so can he, I guess. Whatever,� he said absently. �And maybe I am willing to think the worst of
him,� he admitted grudgingly. �He does
the same, I�m sure. It�s not a fucking
excuse, it�s a fact. But no, you�re
fucking right. Maybe he can change. I won�t believe it until I see it, but maybe
he can,� he muttered. He laughed then,
holding her tightly. �And I did throw
him for a fucking loop, didn�t I?�
�Mmm-hmm,� she
purred. �Something for which I am very
thankful.� She leaned over to kiss him,
pausing when he seemed to change in some indefinable way. He was still holding her, but the set of his
face had changed stly.tly. �So much for
sleeping in,� she mumbled.
�Fuck,� Sands
muttered, not moving. �Are you two doing
what I fucking think you�re doing? Never
mind, I fucking know you two are
doing what I fucking think you�re doing,� Sands said, completely aware of just
how . . . intimate his position with Salida was at the moment. �Well this is an interesting dilemma. Not a totally unexpected one, granted, but
fuck me if I�m not surprised. Sorry, bad
choice of words. How do you propose we
solve this? And don�t tell me to back to
sleep, because I�m much too fucking awake for that to be possible now.�
Salida blushed
bright red, remembering just how intimately their bodies were joined, and
laughed disbelievingly. �Sands, if you
don�t �turn your back� now, I�m going to do a lot more de the than just
breaking your finger. And if you want to
get any action of your own today, I suggest you not push me.�
�I�m going, I�m
going,� Sands assured her, feeling somewhat inexplicably embarrassed himself. It wasn�t every day that you woke up to find
yourself fucking another man�s wife. He
greatly wanted to make a comment of some kind. He didn�t know what it would be, but it would
guarantee a reaction out of sunrise � most likely a bad one � but he wisely
held his tongue. �And good fucking
morning to the both of you too,� he grumbled, and left.
The couple quickly
parted, both regretting that they had to, and resenting Sands for making
them. Salida rolled herself in the
blankets and buried her still flaming face in a pillow. �Could his fucking timing have been any
worse?� she mumbled.
�No,� Jeffrey
declared. �Well, actually it could have,
but I really don�t want to fucking think about that right now. Sorry vixen, that shouldn�t have fucking
happened. I should have fucking noticed
he was waking up,� he bent an arm over his face, blocking out the light. He then laughed, but it wasn�t a happy sound. �You might be amused to know that he was
feeling almost embarrassed as I�m sure you look right now.�
�Go fuck yourself,�
she muttered. She was in a bad mood
because she�d been interrupted while she was with her husband, and because now
that Sands was awake, he�d be leaving.
Not to mention she was humiliated to be caught in that position.
�Don�t fucking take
this out on me. I didn�t fucking ask
Sands to wake up, now did I?� he asked, pulling his arm off of his face and
sitting up on the bed to look at her. �I�m
sorry you�re fucking embarrassed but there�s nothing I can fucking do about
that. This would have happened sooner or
later and you fucking know it, vixen.�
�No, I didn�t
realize that, thank you very much.
Whenever I�m around you my common sense seems to melt away, so this
particular scenario has never appeared outside my nightmares.� She knew this wasn�t his fault, but that didn�t
make the embarrassment go away. �And I�d
appreciate it if you didn�t lecture me,� she snapped, getting up and slamming
the door behind her as she went into the bathroom to take a shower.
There was no way in
hell Jeffrey was just going to let that stand. He got up off the bed and strode purposefully
behind his fuming wife, barging in through the bathroom door which she had been
seconds away from locking. �I wasn�t
done talking yet, vixen. So if you think
you can just walk away, you�re sorely mistaken. I�m fucking sorry Sands interrupted, I�m
fucking sorry we have a fucking third wheel with us no matter where we go. But there is nothing I can fucking do about
it. You fucking knew that when you
married me and you sure as hell know about it now.� He started pacing back and forth along the
tile angrily as he talked, completely unaware or at least not caring that he
was still completely naked. �And fine, I
won�t fucking lecture you. But don�t you
dare blame this on me. I didn�t ask for
any of this and fuck you if you think I did. And since we�re being so honest with one another, why don�t I lay all the fucking cards on
the table? You�re the one who made the deal with Sands. Not me. You�re
the one who said he should be treated like a fucking adult and have time alone
to himself, not me. I�m sorry you�re
fucking pissed at me because Sands is going to take advantage of that deal, but
it�s not my fucking fault!�
Before she could
stop herself, she slapped Jeffrey across the face. Then, trembling with anger, she all but
screamed: �I�m not fucking blaming
you for anything, you insensitive
lout! Before you jump the fucking gun,
maybe you should take into consideration that I�m embarrassed and humiliated
and that I need the chance to calm down before you start pointing the
finger! And if that�s how you really
feel, why don�t you just leave me the hell alone!?� As soon as the words were out of her moth,
she regretted them, but she wasn�t going to back down unless she had too. She wasn�t going to be pushed around, and she
wasn�t going to let him get away with laying all the blame for this on her
feet.
-CRACK!-
The sound echoed off the hard bathroom tiles for almost a full minute
before it had fully sunk in what had just happened. I
fucking slapped her. I can�t believe I
fucking slapped her. �I�� The
words caught in his throat. Jeffrey just
stood there, his left arm still tense, staring at the blazing red handprint
across the right side of Salida�s face and the thin trail of blood that
trickled out of a corner of her lip. He
no longer felt angry. He no longer felt
anything. I fucking slapped her, he thought to himself again. He couldn�t say the words aloud, because if he
did, they would somehow make what had just happened so much more real than the
physical evidence on her face did, and he couldn�t deal with that right now. He hadn�t even realized that he was backing
away from her until his back hit the wall and he stood there dumbfounded before
sinking down to the floor.
�I don�t know why I
did that,� he said at last, not looking at her. Not able
to look at her. He had never hit a woman
before. He had killed them time and time
again, but he had never actually hit a living, breathing woman before and
knowing that he now had made him feel sick. Is this
guilt? he asked himself slowly, unable to give himself the answer he
sought. He had nothing to compare tsenssensation with; he had never felt guilt. But he imagined that this was probably pretty
fucking similar to what guilt must feel like. He could feel Sands stirring restlessly in the
back of his brain but he didn�t care. He
couldn�t stop seeing the look on Salida�s face as he . . . slapped her. She had every fucking right to her rage now,
and he vowed to himself that he wouldn�t fight it, no matter what she said or
did. He merely sat there, looking at her
feet as he waited for her to say something; anything.
Salida merely sunk
on the floor as her own legs had folded on her, a hand on the side of her face,
trying to cool the fire there. Fire that
was quickly being replaced by numbness.
She couldn�t believe she�d hit him . . . or that he�d actually hit her back
. . . but she wasn�t going to rail at him for it. If the look on his face was anything to judge
by, then he was already beating himself up over it. She�d let it pass this time . . . but if it ever happened again, she�d let him have
it.
Swallowing hard,
she said in a barely audible voice, �We both lost control. Didn�t we?�
This was the first time that they�d ever really fought, and she found that she didn�t like it at all. After a lifetime of fighting, she was ready
to stop. �I�m sorry,� she whispered,
willing to make the first concession. �I
should have explained why I was leaving.�
�I shouldn�t have
hit you. I can�t believe I fucking hit
you,� Jeffrey said slowly, still unable to put the whole horrible tableau out
of his mind. It was set to loop and he
couldn�t fucking stop it. �Lost control?
Yeah, that�s one way to fucking put it,�
he said with a bitter laugh. Jeffrey was
about to say more when he closed his eyes with a grimace and muttered. �Sands is back.�
�You don�t sound
all that happy to see�� Sands cut himself off as he took in Salida�s battered
state and knew immediately what must have happened. �Oh nice one, asshole. Add assault and battery charges to the list,
why the fuck not? Knocked the wifey for
a good one I see, I applaud you,� Sands said dryly. �Nice fucking job.�
�Shut the hell up,
Sands, unless you want to find yourself sleeping away the next week!
You don�t know what you�re fucking talking about, and it�s not something
that you n�t n�t done yourself.� Salida
immediately jumped to her husband�s defense.
�I don�t fucking
hit women. Kill them, sure, when the
mood strikes me, but hit? Never. I didn�t think Jeffrey did either until now. What did you fucking say to him to set him
off?� Sands was unfazed by Salida�s threat, and now he simply wanted to know
what had happened.
�You fucking hit me, Sands. The night we fucking met. I�m sorry if you�ve forgotten, but I was
wearing that bruise for a week and it�s none of your damn business what
happened between us.�
�Sorry,� he
muttered, somewhat chastened. Since he
didn�t have anything else to say to that he simply remained wisely quiet.
�What time were you
planning on leaving?� Salida asked after several long, uncomfortable moments of
silence.
�I was going out
for breakfast, but you and Jeffrey can have time to talk if you want. I wasn�t planning on going out to until around
noon to meet . . . Aida . . . but it
might be better for everyone if I just went back to fucking sleep, huh?� he
said with a sarcastic drawl. �It�s much too fucking early to be awake anyway.�
He left them alone without further ceremony.
Salida sat in
disbelief for a moment, shocked that he'd left without a fuss. Then, remembering the reason she was on the
cold floor in the first place, she pulled herself across the tile towards her
husband, freezing when he shrunk from her.
�Lover?� she asked in puzzled whisper.
Why was he moving away from her?
Why wasn�t he saying anything?
�I fucking hit you,�
he said again slowly, still not looking at her. He didn�t bother rubbing at his own stinging
face where she had inflicted her own slap; he deserved the pain. �Oh God, I really did it. I hit you. I was so angry with you that I should probably
consider myself fucking lucky all I did was just hit you, but I can�t. Why did I do that? Why did I hit you?� he asked himself. �The only woman I�ve ever loved and I fucking
hit her. I fucking hurt her.� It was clear he
wasn�t speaking to anyone but himself any longer.
�Jeffrey, I�m
alright.� Salida was getting
worried. He was taking this rather
hard. Harder than she was. �It doesn�t even hurt.� It would later, but right now that entire
side of her face was simply numb. She
moved closer, her hands reaching out to brush against arm and shoulder. �Talk to me,� she whispered. �I love you.
I�ll listen.� He shuddered under
her hands.
�I hurt you. I didn�t even think about it, I just did it. I just reached up my fucking hand, and. . .�
he trailed off. �God, I can still hear
the fucking sound of it echoing in my fucking head.� He looked at her for the fist time then, his
eyes wide. �Is this guilt? Tell me, I want to fucking know. If it is, you can fucking keep it. I don�t want it. I don�t want � I didn�t want to hurt you. I shout I choose to love you.
And this doesn�t change that.� She didn�t know what to do. She didn�t.
�And . . . and if you can�t believe that, then I don�t know how to help
you,� she whispered.
Deciding it�d be
best to leave him to his thoughts since there was nothing else she could say to
convincm, sm, she locked the door � making it clear he was to stay put for the
time being � and went ahead and climbed into the shower, turning on the
water. But first she warned him, �Don�t
you dare move from that spot, lover.� If he couldn�t solve this on his own, she was
going to have to kick his ass out of this trance that was hurting her so much.
�I�ve got nowhere
else to go,� Jeffrey said to himself since she obviously wouldn�t be able to
hear him over the roar of the water. It�s not that fucking easy, he thought
to himself. He leaned back against the
cold tile, hugging himself and shivering, trying not to think about the warm
shower with his even warmer naked wife inside. Don�t
think about her. You don�t deserve to be
with her now after what you just did. God what was this guilt, and why was it making
him fucking feel like this? He didn�t
even fucking know if what he was feeling was guilt, but what else could it be? What else could make him feel fucking unfit to
even look at his own fucking wife for Christ�s sake? How was he supposed to deal with this? How could
he deal with this?
He had never known
guilt. Not until now. He had killed time and time again; he knew it
was wrong, and yet he didn�t care. He
couldn�t be made to care. He still
couldn�t. If he was truly feeling guilt
for the first time, it wasn�t all encompassing. He didn�t feel anything for the dozens of
people he had killed. They were gone,
they no longer mattered. If he hadn�t
killed them, something or someone else would have eventually. So why was he feeling guilt now? Because
of her. Because you hit her. You hurt her. He couldn�t work this out on his own. He didn�t know if he ever would. He felt empty and hollow inside, and the only
person who could cure that was the person he couldn�t stand to be around
because of what he had done. He had hurt
her without a second thought. And what
was worse, he knew he would do it again. No matter how mhe the tried to convince
himself otherwise, he knew that he would and could hurt her again if he had to. He didn�t want to, but it wasn�t a matter of
what he wanted. It was a matter of what
he had done, and would do. He was so
caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn�t noticed Salida turn off the water
and step out of the shower until she was already standing next to him.
�Get up,� she said
tonelessly, wrapping a towel around her dripping body. She was taking a risk, but there was only one
way she could think of to make him believe that she still loved him and wanted
to be with him.
Jeffrey looked up
at her with an almost pitiable look on his face but did as she asked without
comment. �Don�t do that again,�
he practically pleaded with her softly. �I thought you had really fucking . . . left
me,� he said slowly, not able to face her for different reasons than guilt. �I thought I had fucking lost you and I fucking
hated it.�
�You weren�t going
to let go of that until I �punished� you, Jeffrey,� she said in a voice near
tears. �And it hurt. It hurt that I wasn�t enough to make you feel better. It hurt that you wouldn�t believe that I love
you enough to forgive you. I didn�t know
how else to make you snap out of it, and I was afraid of what would happen if I
didn�t. an>San>So yes, I decided to make you
think I left. But did I?� She was trembling now from the force of her
words. �I�m right here. No matter how much you think I might leave
you, I won�t. Not willingly. I . . .
love . . . you,� she enunciated slowly.
�Let me prove it. Let me do
whatever it takes to prove it.�
�Alright,� Jeffrey
said softly. One word filled with all
the emotion, guilt and heartache he possessed within him at the moment. He loved her. More than anything he had ever known. He didn�t move, but he would have given
anything to touch her, to hold her, and to be held. But he couldn�t move. His feet were rooto tho the ground and all he
could do was stare at her.
Salida once again
saw his difficulty, and she was more than willing to fix it. �I love you,� she murmured, taking him by the
hand and leading him back the bedroom. �I
love you,� she whispered, making him lie down on the bed as she pushed the
restraints out of the way. �I love you
more than I can say,� she pleaded with him, hoping he believed her, lying down
beside him and pulling him into her arms, holding him tightly. �You�re mine,
and I refuse to let you doubt that. You can doubt anything else you want, but not
that. I won�t let you doubt me.�
�I�m so sorry,
vixen,� he moaned into her neck. �So
very fucking sorry. I know you�re not
mad, I understand that, I think, but I need to say it anyway. I�m sorry. I didn�t mean to hurt you. s'> I fucking love you more than anything else in
this entire fucking world and if I never hurt you again it will be too fucking
soon,� he eredered, burying his face in her hair and reveling in her touch. He didn�t like to admit it to himself, but he
needed this. He needed her touch. He needed her.
More than he had words to describe. He pulled away from her neck and looked at her
for a moment with pain-filled eyes before leaning down to kiss her with a
mixture of passion and pure desperation. �I am yours,� he said, breathlessly when he
finally ended the desperate kiss. Jeffrey obligingly let her go, and she
quickly climbed into a t-shirt and a pair of boxer shorts before returning to
him, closing her own eyes in contentment as he half laid on top of her, his
arms around her and his head resting on her shoulder. She let her arms stoke his back slowly and
sweetly, lulling him to sleep.
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More Than Darkness