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June 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I love the story so far, but it's a little hard to read... Try breaking the paragraphs up a bit, especially during conversations (sometimes it's hard to tell who's speaking).
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June 6, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I really want to read this and I'm sure it's really good, but the huge blocks of paragraphs makes it impossible. Could you format a little?
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June 6, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Hehehe. He had it coming. All around good chapter, only thing to complain about is the slightly block-ish paragraphs, but other than that its great! I can't wait for more
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June 6, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Glee! Must have more!
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June 5, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Not bad. Good job on keeping Aayla alive. Also, it seems like you have some interesting twists planned, I can't wait to read more.
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June 4, 2005 at 12:00 AM
You do realize that if you do not update this soon, I will resort to hunting you down and stealing your computer, okay?
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May 31, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Of course there was going to be a romance between them. How sweet. I am digging the details and I can picture everything happening quite well. I am looking forward to the club and what more is to happen. This emblem Aayla gave Tavin sounds awesome. Lucifer reminds me of some people I know. lol Keep up the good work!
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May 31, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Great story! UPDATE SOON!
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May 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
well you would assume wrong, Tavin is his own person. I will have updates for you in at least the next few days. if not a bit longer, im kind of stumped on chapter three.
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May 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I must say I am glad to see a writer who is willing to bring on Aayla, and her 'death'. I was a great fan of her character, and sad to see her die in such an un-heroic way. As for the story, I have no major problems with it, in fact It is quite good, I look forward to further chapters