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Reviews for The Goblin Kings Women

By : SilkenPetal
  • From ANON - sinthetikangel on May 11, 2009
    I like it so far. I think he should toy with Sarah but in the end chooses her. Or at least makes her his head mistress or wife. Well done!
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  • From Tay on March 23, 2009
    Oooh, this story is really good! You sooo need to update I want to see what happens next!!
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  • From DreamsofCemtaurs on January 11, 2008
    Oh please tell me your gona update this....
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  • From ANON - Mageblood on October 20, 2006
    I love your story and the direction it seems to be heading in. The dreams of past and unconsciously straying back to her old self, added with his dressier to seemingly want more that just her body. It sounds really good!!!!!

    So loads of inspiration to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • From ANON - Tsukashi on October 04, 2006
    This story is awesome! Beautifully told thus far, I look forward to future installments.

    Woman is singular, Women is plural, but you use Women all the time, even when talking only about one woman. There are some other typo's and small grammatical mistakes like that.

    Also, you jump around viewpoints in the same paragraph. You use "I" and "she" when referring to Sarah, and you do this in a few places. You should pick one way & stick with that version - it is less confusing all around.

    You may think of having a beta look this over for you. Fixing those errors would take this from a good story and make it a great story. Keep up the good work!
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  • From ANON - turtlerad on September 30, 2006
    For a rough draft, I though that Ch.3 was really good. If this is what you can write when you are uninspired, I can't wait to read what you can write when you are inspired.
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  • From ANON - Cryllin on September 28, 2006
    wow!!! i love this story! your writing is just amazing. please, give us more chapters!

    - Cryllin
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  • From ANON - Lelia Carico on July 18, 2006
    please continue this story
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  • From ANON - TheGirlWhoLovesHim on October 23, 2005
    damn...Jareth totally played Sara...this is really good.
    Finally that bitch gets what she deserves...
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  • From ANON - kittykat60304 on October 05, 2005
    Please write more. I love your writing and it is such a good piece. I look forward to more.
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  • From oxcab on September 24, 2005
    update soon I really like your story and please don't make Jareth bald ^_^
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  • From ANON - Anon on September 24, 2005
    I really like what you have so far, it seems pretty true to how the characters would have acted.
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  • From ANON - Aquis on September 23, 2005
    aah..I was really confused there at the begining of the chapter. but now it makes sense. I like your take on this challenge, It's very good. keep writing :)
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  • From ANON - TheShadowCat on September 22, 2005
    Again, you went from third person to first person perspective. This time in the middle of a paragraph. This is *very* confusing. Also, the plural of woman is women. Please note the differance.
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  • From ANON - gingersnap1993 on September 21, 2005
    OOO|OH...nice. Is he really so insecure that he had to manufacture memories for Sarah? I can just imagine what she'd do if she were to find out. He may or may not love her, but there is no doubting his wanting her.
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