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Reviews for Tempting Twi'lek

By : darthtrex
  • From RogueFlamer on July 12, 2005
    I can't help but say that this is a great story. I enjoy the fact that you turned it into a continuing fanfic instead of making it a one short.
    You did amasingly well for a first time writing a sex scene. It was light and following, which works wonders with your writing style. I found little to no errors throughout the story (tho dancing around happily at having my two favorite characters beating around the bush didn't help ^^;)
    There is one problem I caught in chapter six that I feel I need to address. As most people know, General Grevious was weezing and coughing throughout his time in Episode III. Most people think it's just in his character, but it's not. People who watched the Clone Wars (yes, that odd cartoon, it really does fill you in on stuff between Episode II and III) will know that he wasn't always weezing. Mace Windo crushed his chest on a last attempt to stop General Grevious from capturing Palpitine. This was a day or two (or less) before Episode III, so he didn't get around to repairing himself, hence why he was weezing and coughing throughout the movie.
    Just a little timbit for you. Otherwise, it's a great story and I'd love to read more when you have the time to update. ^o^
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  • From ANON - Blood Prince on July 12, 2005
    Oh, I sense a cool battle scene coming on. Update soon, how are Obi and Aayla going keep their relationship working when they get back to the temple?
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  • From ANON - Blood Prince on July 11, 2005
    Good you updated, this was a good chapter. I was half expecting Plo Koon to do a dramatic jedi entarnce on them...anyways very enjoyable so please keep writing
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  • From ANON - wes on July 11, 2005
    yes this is definatly better than the other scene
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  • From ANON - Phantom on July 11, 2005
    Very well done.

    The sex scenes have been good, and the story is interesting.
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  • From ANON - kayladie on July 11, 2005
    Hey, I like this a LOT! I don't normally read Obi-Wan fics, but the pairing sounded too interesting to pass up. For your first sex scene ever, you did very well! And I thought the actual sex scene between two people who are undoubtedly virgins was very well done. I liked the bit with the bra, very amusing.

    I also like that you're adding a plot to it. PWP is okay sometimes, but I'm a big believer in Porn WITH Plot, LOL.

    You know, I really hope that the bad guys weren't monitoring Obi-Wan and Aayla's cell, or they're gonna be really embarrassed!

    More soon!
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  • From ANON - Blood Prince on July 09, 2005
    Hey this is really good, it's hard to find a plot based fic like this. I really enjoed the whole thing and can't wait for more. The sex scene was good and tied in well with the plot, I hope you update soon
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  • From ANON - wes on July 08, 2005
    pwp would have been better hint hint
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  • From ANON - Phantom on July 08, 2005
    I like it, very interesting chapter
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  • From ANON - Anon on July 05, 2005
    MORE SEX MORE SEX MORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEX MORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEXMORE SEX MORE SEX!
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  • From ANON - Phantom on July 05, 2005
    That was a good chapter, you don't have to worry.
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  • From ANON - wes on July 05, 2005
    you did well with that chapter though it would have been nice to have had obi return the favor maybe next chap anyway I don’t now why every one is worried there sex chapters aren’t good chances are if you like though sound of something others will too
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  • From ANON - Laurachan (not logged in) on July 05, 2005
    well, that was hot...
    Aayla is really naughty! Leaving poor Obi-wan like that... mwahahahah!!

    keep writing, please.
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  • From ANON - mesa on July 05, 2005
    HURRY UP! bring on the SEX!!
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  • From ANON - Rena on July 05, 2005
    Nicely done!
    I havent seen many fics about Aayla (one other to be precise), so its good to see her getting some attention.
    And I agree with Phantom, a long story is better than a quick PWP.

    Good writing so far! Keep it up ^.^
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